God
Jimmy Buffett Lyrics

Well, like to explain to you all before,
I want to clarify something to all of you beforehand,

I ain't no drinkin' man
I am not a person who indulges in drinking alcohol

I tried it once and it got me highly irregular
I attempted drinking once and it caused significant disruption to my bodily functions

And I swore I'd never do it again
And I made a promise to myself that I would never engage in it again

I promised my brother in-law that I'd go up watch his still
I made a commitment to my brother-in-law to keep an eye on his illegal alcohol distillation apparatus

While he went in to town to vote
While he went to the town to participate in the voting process

It was right up on the mountain
The still was situated on the mountain

Where the map said it would be
At the precise location indicated by the map

Friends let me tell you one thing,
My dear friends, allow me to disclose one thing to you

Tho it wasn't no ordinary still
Although it was not an ordinary distillation apparatus

It stood up on that mountainside
It was positioned on that mountainside

Like a hugh golden opal
Resembling a magnificent golden gemstone

God's yeller moon shinin' on the cool clear evenin'
The bright yellow moon, illuminated by God, shining on the serene and clear evening

God's little lanterns twinklin' on and off in the heavens
The small heavenly lights created by God flickering intermittently in the sky

Like I explain'd to you once before I ain't no drinkin' man
As I have previously stated, I am not someone who indulges in drinking alcohol

But temptation got the best of me
However, I succumbed to temptation

And I took a slash
And I consumed a generous amount

That yella whiskey runnin' down my throat like honey dew vine water
The yellow-colored whiskey flowing down my throat like a refreshing stream of honeydew water

And I took another slash, took another'n an another'n an another'n
And I continued to consume more and more, one after another

For you knew I'd downed one whole jug of that shit
Before you knew it, I had finished an entire jug of that alcohol

And commenced to gettin' hot flashes
And then I started experiencing sudden feelings of heat

Goose pimples was runnin' up and down my body
Goosebumps started appearing and disappearing on my body

And a feelin' came over me like somethin' I'd never experienced before
And I felt a sensation that was completely new to me

It was like, like I was in love
It was akin to the feeling of being in love

In love for the first time, with anything that moved
Experiencing love for the first time, towards anything that captured my attention

Animate, inanimate it didn't matter
Whether it was living or non-living, it made no difference

It's like there's a great neon sign flashin' on an' off in my brain sayin' 'Jimmy Buffett there's a great day a comin'
It felt as if there was a prominent neon sign flickering in my brain, conveying the message 'Jimmy Buffett, a fantastic day awaits you'

'Cause I was drunk
Because I was under the influence of alcohol

I wasn't knee crawlin', slip slidin', Reggie Youngin', Commode huggin' drunk
I wasn't excessively intoxicated to the point of crawling on my knees, sliding around, or clinging to the toilet

I was God's own drunk and a fearless man
I was a drunk chosen by God and a fearless individual

And that's when I first saw the bear
And that is when I initially encountered the bear

He was a Kodiak lookin' fella 'bout nineteen feet tall
It was a bear resembling a Kodiak, approximately nineteen feet in height

He rambled up over the hill
He ambled towards me, coming over the hill

Expectin' me to do one of two things, flip or fly, I didn't do either one
Anticipating that I would react in either of two ways, panic or flee, but I did not respond in either manner

It hung him up
It confused and perplexed him

He started sniffin' around my body tryin' to smell fear
He began sniffing around me, attempting to detect any signs of fear

But he ain't gonna smell no fear 'cause I'm God's own drunk and a fearless man
But he won't sense any fear because I am a fearless individual chosen by God and heavily intoxicated

It hung him up
It perplexed and bewildered him

He looked right in my eyes, and my eyes was a lot redder than his was
He gazed directly into my eyes, and my eyes were much redder than his

It hung him up
It confused and bewildered him

So I approached him, I said 'Mr. Bear, I love every hair on your twenty-seven acre body
Therefore, I approached him and expressed, 'Mr. Bear, I have affection for every strand of hair on your immense twenty-seven acre body

I know you got a lot of friends over there on the other side of the hill
I am aware that you have numerous companions residing on the opposite side of the hill

There's ole' rare bear, tall bear, Freddy bear, Kelly bear
There are old rare bear, tall bear, Freddy bear, and Kelly bear

Really bear, smelly the bear, smokey the bear, Pokey the bear
Also, the bear named Really bear, the bear with an unpleasant smell, the bear named Smokey, and the bear named Pokey

I want you to go back over there tonight and tell them I'm feelin' right
Therefore, I request you to return to them tonight and inform them that I am in a good state of mind

You tell them I love each and everyone of them like a brother and a sister
Convey my unconditional love for each and every one of them, treating them as my own siblings

But if they give me any trouble tonight I'm gonna run every God damn one of them off the hill'
However, if they cause any problems tonight, I will forcefully remove each and every one of them from the hill

He took two steps backwards and didn't know what to think
The bear took two steps backward, unsure of how to react

Neither did I but bein' charitable and cautious
I, too, was uncertain, but I decided to approach the situation with kindness and alertness

Well hell I approached him again
With determination, I approached him once more

I said 'Mr. Bear, You know in the eyes of the Lord
I addressed him, saying, 'Mr. Bear, you should know that in the eyes of the Lord

We're both beasts when it comes right down to it
Both of us are considered creatures when you really think about it

So I want you to be my buddy, Buddy bear
Hence, I would like you to become my companion, Buddy bear

So I took ole' buddy bear by his island size paw
Accordingly, I grabbed Buddy bear by his extraordinarily large paw

And I led him over to the still
Then, I guided him towards the distillery

He's a sniffin' around that thing cause he's smellin' somethin' good
He started sniffing around that apparatus because he detected an appealing scent

I gave him one of them jugs of honey dew vine water
I offered him one of those jugs filled with the sweet liquid made from honeydew vine

He downed it up right
He consumed it rapidly and entirely

Looked like one of them damn bears in the circus
He resembled one of those bears performing at the circus

Sippin' sasparilly in the moonlight
Seemingly savoring sarsaparilla under the moonlight

I gave him another'n an another'n an another'n
I proceeded to provide him with more and more

For I knew it he downed eight of them
Before I knew it, he had consumed a total of eight jugs

And commenced to doin' the bear dance
Subsequently, he began performing a dance unique to bears

Two snips, a snort, a fly turn, and a grunt
His dance routine involved two quick movements, followed by a snort, a swift rotation, and a grunt

It was so simple like the jitter bug
The dance was remarkably simple, resembling the movements of the jitterbug

It plum evaded me
The understanding of the dance eluded me completely

We worked ourselves into a tumultuous uproar
We became immersed in a chaotic and noisy commotion

And I was awful tired and went over to the hillside
Feeling extremely exhausted, I walked over to the side of the hill

And I laid down and went to sleep
I laid down and drifted off into a state of slumber

Slept for four hours and dreampt me some tremulous dreams
I slept for a duration of four hours and had unsettling dreams

When I woke up, there was God's yeller moon
Upon awakening, I was greeted by the sight of God's yellow moon

Shinin' on the clear cool evenin'
Radiating its light on the serene and chilly evening

God's little lanterns twinklin' on and off
The small lantern-like objects created by God flickering intermittently

In the heavens
In the celestial realm

My buddy the bear was a missin'
My buddy, the bear, was nowhere to be found

Want to know something else friends and neighbors
Let me share another interesting piece of information, my friends and neighbors

So was that still
The distillery was also gone