Pusher
Kelley James Lyrics
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I’m a stubborn afterthought on a tight rope wire
Volatile as hell, as you can tell, or maybe you can’t
I break promises, I take for granted
I push pain on the rain so it stays like I planned it
I’m a bandit, who’s addicted to change
But you – you’re so innocent
Don’t you get it
I just don’t get it
I just can’t understand
Why you would ever want to be with me
I’m a nightmare, I’m denial
I’m a deep dark secret and your hands on the bible
And you smile because you can’t cry
I’m a sinner, I’m a patho
I’m a vampire, the truth is the light, I’m in the shadows
In a battle, with a demon and the sun
When I leave today no matter what I say
You’ll know it’s for the best then
If the words come out trying to curb your doubt
Please leave them to the west wind
And it will take me away
I’m a pusher, I’m a taker
I’m a trouble talking tyrant and a fight instigator
Wave a flag, get you close and then I’m gonna break ya
I’m a head-case, and I’m headstrong
Right or wrong when the going gets going I’m gone
To where I don’t belong
Danger zone is my home, when I’m all alone
In Kelley James's song "Pusher," the lyrics depict a man who is aware of his flaws as he describes himself as a goblin, a fighter, and a stubborn afterthought on a tightrope wire. He possesses a volatile personality that makes him unpredictable and breaks promises easily, adding that he takes things for granted. He confesses that he's a bandit who's addicted to change. On the other hand, the singer reveals that his partner is innocent and pure, and he wonders how she could stay with someone like him, who is a nightmare, in denial, and an unchanging sinner. He describes the feeling of being in a battle with a demon and the sun, which may represent his struggles with himself.
Furthermore, the singer communicates a sense of sadness and regret, recognizing that he is a pusher and a trouble-talking tyrant who starts fights and builds people up just to break them. He warns his partner not to believe any words he says and to leave them to the west wind when he leaves that day because it is for the best. He presents himself as a head-case, and when things get going, he's gone, but he identifies the danger zone as his home.
Line by Line Meaning
I’m a goblin, I’m a fighter
I am someone who is considered as creepy and fights endlessly for my success.
I’m a stubborn afterthought on a tight rope wire
I'm always ready to hold on to my decisions no matter how risky they are.
Volatile as hell, as you can tell, or maybe you can’t
I have an unpredictable nature which can sometimes be hard to deal with for others.
I break promises, I take for granted
I tend to not keep my promises and take those around me for granted.
I push pain on the rain so it stays like I planned it
I try to control how things pan out and make others bear the consequences even if it means bringing them pain.
I’m a bandit, who’s addicted to change
I'm someone who steals from others and is constantly looking for change.
But you – you’re so innocent
You are someone who is pure and has not been corrupted by the negative aspects of life.
How did you find a man like me
I am surprised that you ended up with a person like me who has so many flaws.
Don’t you get it
Do you not understand?
I just don’t get it
I fail to comprehend.
I just can’t understand
I am unable to understand.
Why you would ever want to be with me
I am questioning why you chose to be with someone like me.
I’m a nightmare, I’m denial
I am someone who causes bad dreams and denies responsibility for my actions.
I’m a deep dark secret and your hands on the bible
I am someone who has something to hide that is so intense that you would swear to secrecy with the highest authority.
And you smile because you can’t cry
You are unable to show your real emotions and therefore you smile to hide them.
I’m a sinner, I’m a patho
I am someone who has committed a sin and is a pathological liar.
I’m a vampire, the truth is the light, I’m in the shadows
I am someone who sucks the energy out of others and only comes into the light when it serves me.
In a battle, with a demon and the sun
I am constantly in a struggle between the evil in me and the desire to be good.
When I leave today no matter what I say
Regardless of what I say when I am leaving today,
You’ll know it’s for the best then
You'll know that it's the right decision after I leave.
If the words come out trying to curb your doubt
If my words are intended to stop you from having doubts,
Please leave them to the west wind
Please ignore them.
And it will take me away
I will be taken away by the wind (metaphorically).
I’m a pusher, I’m a taker
I am someone who is always pushing others and taking things from them.
I’m a trouble talking tyrant and a fight instigator
I am someone who causes trouble by instigating fights and trying to dominate others.
Wave a flag, get you close and then I’m gonna break ya
I pretend to be friendly but once you get close, I'll hurt you.
I’m a head-case, and I’m headstrong
I am mentally unstable and very stubborn.
Right or wrong when the going gets going I’m gone
Regardless of whether I am right or wrong, when the situation gets tough, I'll leave.
To where I don’t belong
I'll go to a place where I do not fit in.
Danger zone is my home, when I’m all alone
I am most comfortable in dangerous situations and that's where I feel secure when by myself.
Contributed by Grayson R. Suggest a correction in the comments below.