MacColl began her career in the late 1970s UK punk rock scene, singing backing vocals for Drug Addix. Her UK hits included the 1981 single "There's a Guy Works Down the Chip Shop Swears He's Elvis", a cover of Billy Bragg's "A New England" in 1985, a duet with Shane MacGowan of The Pogues on "Fairytale of New York" in 1987, and a cover of The Kinks' song "Days" in 1989. She was probably most recognizable in the United States as the writer of "They Don't Know" a hit in 1979.
After a break from the music industry for much of the 1990s, several trips to Cuba and Brazil restored MacColl's creative muse, and the world music-inspired (particularly Cuban and other Latin American forms) Tropical Brainstorm, often described as her finest work, was released in 2000.
On 18 December 2000, while swimming in a restricted diving area with her family on a holiday in Cozumel, she was killed in a collision with a powerboat while managing to drag her son out of its path. The boat was owned by Mexican supermarket millionaire Guillermo González Nova (owner of Comercial Mexicana), who was on board with several members of his family. A boathand, José Cen Yam, claimed to have been driving the boat and was found guilty of culpable homicide and, under Mexican law, allowed to pay a fine of 1034 pesos (about USD 90) in lieu of a prison sentence of that many days. However, eyewitnesses contradict Cen Yam's claim to have been driving and also González Nova's claim that the boat was travelling at a speed of only one knot. MacColl's family are campaigning for a judicial review into the events surrounding her death, including an application to the Inter-American Commission on Human Rights. The BBC has featured on several of its channels a documentary by Olivia Lichtenstein, entitled Who Killed Kirsty MacColl?
In 2001, a bench was placed by the southern entrance to London's Soho Square as a memorial to her, after a lyric from one of her most poignant songs: "One day I'll be waiting there/ No empty bench inSoho Square.
Hard to Believe
Kirsty MacColl Lyrics
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And sometimes when you get mad I want to say goodbye
But I know in my heart I could never be the one to leave
It's just that I find love so hard to believe sometimes
I try to understand all the things that you do
But sometimes I wonder why I chose a man like you
'cause you hurt me without even trying so many times
Sometimes I see your eyes on another girl
Then you say you love me more than the whole wide world
So I've learned to close my eyes to it and not read between the lines
It's just that I find love so hard to believe sometimes
Yes I've learned to close my eyes to it
I've reconciled my mind to it
It's just that I find love so hard to believe sometimes
I said that I find love so hard to believe sometimes
The lyrics of Kirsty MacColl's song "Hard to Believe" describe the struggles and doubts that can arise in a relationship. The singer acknowledges that she loves her partner, but their behavior can be confusing and hurtful. She mentions moments when he seems sad or angry, which her emotional empathy is provoked to the point of tears, and how she experiences moments where she wonders why she chose him because he has hurt her unintentionally. The chorus of the song serves as a realization that the struggles in the relationship are not necessarily due to her partner's actions but her own difficulty in believing in love.
The singer goes on to describe how she has learned to ignore some of the things he does, such as staring at other women or saying things that do not make sense to her. She acknowledges that she has closed her eyes to the behavior in order to make their relationship work. The song does, however, end on a rather despondent note, with the singer stating that despite all her efforts, she still finds love hard to believe sometimes.
The lyrics of "Hard to Believe" are complex in that they express both love and doubt. They show that sometimes, even when we think we have found the right person, there can be moments of uncertainty and insecurity. Kirsty MacColl's delivery of the lyrics in her characteristic delicate and breathy style add further layers of fragility to the song. The fact that she wrote this song based on her own experiences adds an element of raw authenticity to the lyrics.
Line by Line Meaning
Sometimes you look so sad that I could cry
There are moments when you appear extremely unhappy, which causes me to feel emotional and want to cry as well.
And sometimes when you get mad I want to say goodbye
At times, when you become angry, I feel like walking away from you and ending our relationship altogether.
But I know in my heart I could never be the one to leave
Despite my feelings of frustration or sadness, I'm aware that I don't have it within myself to be the one to call it quits on us.
It's just that I find love so hard to believe sometimes
The reason for my doubts and uncertainties is simply because I struggle to comprehend what love is and how it works at times.
I try to understand all the things that you do
In my efforts to comprehend how love works, I make an attempt to understand your actions or decisions.
But sometimes I wonder why I chose a man like you
At other moments, I question my own choices, asking myself why I selected you as my partner.
'cause you hurt me without even trying so many times
When you don't make a conscious effort to do so, there are moments when you've harmed me, both physically and emotionally.
I can't help but find love so hard to believe sometimes
As a result of the good and the bad experiences we've shared, I can't shake the feeling that love is a difficult thing to understand and trust in completely.
Sometimes I see your eyes on another girl
On certain occasions, I've caught you glancing at other women in a way that makes me question your commitment to me.
Then you say you love me more than the whole wide world
You often reassure me of your love and devotion, telling me that I mean more to you than anything or anyone else in the world.
So I've learned to close my eyes to it and not read between the lines
To maintain my sense of trust in our relationship, I've trained my mind to dismiss these moments of doubt and not focus on the possibility of infidelity or betrayal.
Yes I've learned to close my eyes to it
I've become adept at ignoring what I perceive as red flags in our relationship and instead choosing to trust in your love for me.
I've reconciled my mind to it
I've come to terms with the fact that our love and relationship is complicated, and I'm choosing to accept it as it is.
It's just that I find love so hard to believe sometimes
Despite all of my doubts and fears, I'm still struggling to come to terms with how love works and how it can impact the course of our lives.
I said that I find love so hard to believe sometimes
To reiterate my ongoing struggle to comprehend and trust in love, I repeat my previous statement that I find it difficult to believe in this abstract concept at certain moments.
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