How I Feel
La Dispute Lyrics


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I say, "A drink might help me sleep."
I say, "I don’t sleep much at all these days."
I say, "It’s cold. Besides, I’m broken."
Hard as earth, the love of the past.
The worth of the world has frozen still.
Like the sheet of ice collecting on the windshield of my car.
Where I caught my reflection frozen in the glass,
a perfect broken image of the future I’d envisioned in the past–
corrupted by fate now, fractured, and fading away.

Replace, replace, replace,
all I felt promised to me.
To be the one who figured it out,
who knew what to do,
who knew how to feel and
felt that love of the past,
the worth of the world,
just set it ablaze and
thaw me out.

Dim lit in a room dark red, where I said,
“Can’t seem to break off from the way I felt, but
I guess you understand, man.
We had no chance.
I’m tired of fighting with the hand I’ve been dealt.

So, I take the cards they give me
And keep my protest on the inside of my mouth.
If the best I can do ain’t gonna stop what’s coming,
what’s the point in trying to change how the hand plays out?"

Don’t we all just die?
Don't we all? Don't we all?
Don’t we all just die?
Don't we all? Don't we all?
When you looked at the light,
did it hurt your eyes? Did it hurt your eyes?
When you looked at the light,




did it hurt you,
like it hurt me?

Overall Meaning

The lyrics to La Dispute’s song “How I Feel” contain a profound melancholy that is at once contemplative and resigned. The first verse sets the tone for the rest of the song, with the singer expressing a sense of hopelessness in the face of his own struggles. He says that a drink might help him sleep, but notes that he doesn't sleep well these days. He feels that he's broken and that the love of the past is as hard as earth, while the worth of the world has frozen still.


The chorus is an achingly honest expression of the singer's yearning. He says that he once felt promised a future full of love and worth, but that fate has corrupted and fractured that future, leaving him feeling lost and alone. He pleads with someone, anyone to replace the emptiness he feels with love and warmth. The second verse reveals a moment of vulnerability, with the singer confessing that he feels trapped by the hand he’s been dealt. He's tired of fighting and trying to change what’s happening.


The final lines of the song echo the chorus and leave the listener with a sense of shared sorrow. The singer asks if everyone else feels the same way, if they too are tired of fighting and if they too will eventually die. He asks if looking at the light hurts like it hurts him, a poignant reference to the end of life. The song is potent in its expression of loss and grief; it leaves the listener with a sense of shared humanity, an understanding that we all struggle at times and that we all need love and warmth to get through life.


Line by Line Meaning

I say, "A drink might help me sleep."
I think drinking alcohol might be the solution to my insomnia.


I say, "I don’t sleep much at all these days."
I am having trouble sleeping at night.


I say, "It’s cold. Besides, I’m broken."
I am feeling cold and broken inside.


Hard as earth, the love of the past.
The love from the past is as hard as the ground.


The worth of the world has frozen still.
Nothing in the world seems to have any value anymore.


Like the sheet of ice collecting on the windshield of my car.
The world seems cold and lifeless, like the ice on my car.


Where I caught my reflection frozen in the glass, a perfect broken image of the future I’d envisioned in the past–corrupted by fate now, fractured, and fading away.
When I looked at my reflection, I saw a fractured image of my idealized future, which is now slowly fading away due to the vagaries of fate.


Replace, replace, replace, all I felt promised to me.
I keep seeking new experiences to replace what I thought I was promised.


To be the one who figured it out, who knew what to do, who knew how to feel and felt that love of the past, the worth of the world, just set it ablaze and thaw me out.
If I was the one who figured it all out, who knew what to do and how to feel, then I would set fire to everything, in order to feel the warmth of the past again.


Dim lit in a room dark red, where I said, "Can’t seem to break off from the way I felt, but I guess you understand, man. We had no chance. I’m tired of fighting with the hand I’ve been dealt."
In a room with dim lighting, I told someone that I was unable to move on from my past feelings, but they understood. We had no chance to change the situation, and I am exhausted from fighting against my lot.


So, I take the cards they give me And keep my protest on the inside of my mouth. If the best I can do ain’t gonna stop what’s coming, what’s the point in trying to change how the hand plays out?
I accept what life gives me and keep my objections to myself because I know that I can't change what's coming. There is no point in trying to change the outcome, as I am powerless to do so.


Don’t we all just die? Don't we all? Don't we all?
Don't we all eventually meet our end?


When you looked at the light, did it hurt your eyes? Did it hurt your eyes?
When you looked at the light, did it cause you pain?


When you looked at the light, did it hurt you, like it hurt me?
Did the light hurt you emotionally, as it did me?




Contributed by Eva C. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Comments from YouTube:

crAsh

This band will never cease to amaze me.

Sara Packard

One of my favorite La Dispute songs. Total catharsis. 

Jonathan Trevino

Song sounds like they wanted to sound like Touche Amore for the split. If you don't listen to TA I recommend you do. 

Sara Packard

Heh heh, I listen to Touche. Know their whole discography really well, and I saw them in concert last July when they were traveling with Tigers Jaw and Dads and in September on a different tour. 
Thank you though :)

Snuggleumpakis

Jonathan Trevino Well it was a split with them so yeah they tried to mesh well together.

Unhinged_ girl

ugh i will always love la dispute. I always forget about this EP with touché amore 🖤 this song with touché amore screaming is literally everything. They need to make another collab

Yephenpeace

This is one of those bands that I've wanted to see live for so long, but never have. These guys are great.

The Gaming Cathedral

"I say a drink might help me sleep, I say I don't sleep much at all these days, I say it's cold, Besides, I'm broken. Hard as earth the love of the past, The worth of the world has frozen"

Lanna's Missing Link

Got a few songs from Spotify last year but just now finding this album and WOW! La Dispute are just amazing :3

Very Naisu

This song is insanely fun to play on guitar

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