.
Like most of Biafra's work, Lard's songs are angrily political (the War on Drugs is a particularly common theme) but often have a tinge of humour.
Lard has not officially toured and have only performed live a handful of times, mostly around the San Francisco area (where Jello lives and operates his Alternative Tentacles record label). The band played during Ministry's 1988 tour and throughout their 1989-1990 dates (Jello was a touring member), once in Chicago after wrapping the recording of The Last Temptation Of Reid, once at the conclusion of a Ministry concert in Los Angeles (March 24, 2003), and at the San Francisco (September 26, 2004) and Seattle (September 29, 2004) dates of Ministry's Evil Doer tour. Because its key members are active with other projects, it is unlikely that the band will tour.
Jourgensen stated in 2009 that Lard would make one final album before calling it a day. However, in 2010 Biafra expressed scepticism over whether this would actually happen, saying, "Me and Al have talked about it for years, but we've never been able to nail down a time to try to put it together."
Discography:
1989 - The Power of Lard (EP)
1990 - The Last Temptation of Reid
1990 - I Am Your Clock (vinyl-only EP; included on the CD version of Last Temptation)
1997 - Pure Chewing Satisfaction
2000 - 70's Rock Must Die
I Wanna be a Drug-Sniffing Dog
Lard Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
So I can snort coke all day long
Bite my master when it suits me
Get off on diminished capacity
I wanna be a customs man
Snoop through your stuff 'cause I can
Sneaky peaky pry through your private lives
Weh oh, weh oh ho
Sure beats Alpo
It's the life
It's the stink
It's the attitude
I wanna be a San Francisco cop
So I can speed and run red lights
And sure as Rodney was a King
We got ways to make you sing
We can seize everything
Houses, cars, and life savings
Keep the loot for ourselves
Fake drug charge works every time
I wanna join the Christian coalition
So I can molest my children
None suspect me 'cause I've been saved
'Til my stepdaughter drowns her kids in a lake
Weh oh, weh oh ho
Spare rod, spoil the child
It's the life
It's the stink
Choose your masks
The lyrics to Lard's song "I Wanna be a Drug-Sniffing Dog" contain provocative and controversial content that is intended to criticize certain societal institutions and behaviors. The song's lyrics express an ironic desire to become a drug-sniffing dog, not because of a desire to enforce the law, but so that they can partake in cocaine use all day long. Additionally, the lyrics express a desire to become a customs officer, for the purposes of snooping through people's belongings and violating their privacy. The lyrics also touch on becoming a San Francisco cop, with the intent to break the law by running red lights and using coercive tactics to extract information from suspects.
Line by Line Meaning
I wanna be a drug-sniffing dog
I desire to work as a drug-sniffing dog
So I can snort coke all day long
I will be able to sniff drugs (specifically cocaine) all day long by working as a drug-sniffing dog
Bite my master when it suits me
I will bite my handler when I feel like it, even though I am trained not to
Get off on diminished capacity
I will enjoy the feeling of being less aware and conscious due to drug exposure
I wanna be a customs man
I aspire to work as a customs officer
Snoop through your stuff 'cause I can
I will search through people's belongings without their consent
Sneaky peaky pry through your private lives
I will invade people's privacy and examine their personal lives without their knowledge or permission
Stroke your panties, jackin' off at lunch
I will fondle women's underwear and masturbate during my work break
Weh oh, weh oh ho
Exclamation of satisfaction or pleasure
Sure beats Alpo
Doing these actions is more enjoyable than eating dog food
It's the life
This is the way of living that I desire
It's the stink
Even though it may not seem pleasant, I find these actions appealing
It's the attitude
The behavior and actions involved in doing these things make me feel powerful and in control
I wanna be a San Francisco cop
I aspire to become a police officer in San Francisco
So I can speed and run red lights
I will use my position as a cop to break traffic laws
And sure as Rodney was a King
Similar to the well-known Rodney King incident, I know how to intimidate and get what I want as a cop
We got ways to make you sing
As police, we know how to make people talk and reveal information by using force or threats
We can seize everything
We are able to take away people's homes, cars, and savings through legal procedures
Keep the loot for ourselves
We will take and keep the proceeds of our legal actions for our own benefit
Fake drug charge works every time
We can easily fabricate drug charges to incriminate someone when there's no concrete evidence
I wanna join the Christian coalition
I desire to be a part of the Christian coalition organization
So I can molest my children
I plan to abuse my own children sexually
None suspect me 'cause I've been saved
People won't expect me to do such horrible things since I identify as a saved Christian
Til my stepdaughter drowns her kids in a lake
Eventually, my stepdaughter will commit a terrible act and I'll be implicated in the crime
Weh oh, weh oh ho
Exclamation of satisfaction or pleasure
Spare rod, spoil the child
The saying that advocates discipline or punishment to prevent a child from being too indulged
Choose your masks
Refers to the idea of having to choose which of these unappealing paths to take in order to survive
Contributed by Natalie G. Suggest a correction in the comments below.