Border
Lewis Del Mar Lyrics


Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴

You're a split identity
A fault line on the border
A disorder
When you pulled out the IV
I spent two days looking for ya
What a horror

What a prison to live in your mind
Like a building that leaves on the lights
What a freedom to feel the outside
Barefoot in a hospital gown
On the train ride

I don't want to be this type of way
I don't want to be this type of way

I'm a split identity
A breath held underwater
A little softer
It's a painful history
How will I tell my daughter
It gets harder

It's a prison to live in your mind
With a child living on the inside
What a freedom to quit keeping time
Fucked up in the hours alone
All my nights

I don't want to be this type of way
I don't want to be this type of way

Am I the sun?
You stared at me in the rear view
Melting under your gaze





No, I don't want to be this type of way

Overall Meaning

In the first verse of "Border" by Lewis Del Mar, the lyrics suggest that the person being addressed is experiencing a split personality disorder. The statement "You're a split identity, a fault line on the border" expresses that the person feels divided and trapped between opposing sides. Removing the IV and leaving a hospital brings up images of escaping containment, but the following line "What a horror" implies that there is a fear of facing the world outside.


The chorus then describes the feeling of being trapped in one's own mind as a prison. The comparison to a building that is always lit, versus the freedom of being fully immersed in the world outside is used to show the desire for a life without constant mental turmoil. The line "On the train ride" could be symbolic of an escape into a new life, yet the repetition of "I don't want to be this type of way" suggests the struggle between wanting to break away and feeling trapped inside.


In the second verse, the singer reveals that they also feel similarly split and trapped. The phrase "A breath held underwater, a little softer" paints a picture of someone trying to keep quiet and not cause trouble. The statement "It's a painful history, how will I tell my daughter, it gets harder" implies a past filled with struggle and trauma that has been internalized and is now affecting future generations.


Overall, "Border" tells a story of two people struggling with internal battles, of trying to escape and break free from their own minds. The lyrics convey a sense of isolation and a desire for freedom, leading to a sense of urgency in the repetition of the phrase "I don't want to be this type of way."


Line by Line Meaning

You're a split identity
You have two distinct personalities that don't always align


A fault line on the border
Your split identity is a source of tension and division


A disorder
Your split identity is a mental illness


When you pulled out the IV
You abandon traditional methods of healing


I spent two days looking for ya
I was worried about your safety and well-being


What a horror
It was a terrible experience for me


It's a prison to live in your mind
Your mind is a place of confinement and restriction


Like a building that leaves on the lights
Your mind is always actively thinking and processing


What a freedom to feel the outside
Being able to escape your own thoughts and feel the world is liberating


Barefoot in a hospital gown
Feeling vulnerable and exposed in unfamiliar territory


On the train ride
Traveling towards a better future


I don't want to be this type of way
I want to change how I am


I'm a split identity
I also struggle with a divided sense of self


A breath held underwater
Feeling submerged and struggling to resurface


A little softer
Trying to be more gentle and compassionate


It's a painful history
My past is filled with trauma and suffering


How will I tell my daughter
I am worried about how my issues will affect my child


It gets harder
Dealing with my mental health becomes increasingly difficult


With a child living on the inside
My inner child and past experiences still haunt me


What a freedom to quit keeping time
Letting go of the past and living in the present is freeing


Fucked up in the hours alone
Struggling to cope with loneliness and isolation


Am I the sun?
Questioning my own self-worth and significance


You stared at me in the rear view
Feeling scrutinized and judged


Melting under your gaze
Feeling uncomfortable and exposed under someone's intense scrutiny


No, I don't want to be this type of way
I want to break free from my mental illness and become a better version of myself




Lyrics ยฉ Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.
Written by: Andrew Maury, Benjamin Griffey, Daniel Noah Miller, Max Lewis Harwood, Stephen Michael Feigenbaum

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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Comments from YouTube:

@Gavin34162

Been struggling with lots of anxiety and depression. This song is incredible. Almost perfect. Your music gives me hope that one day Iโ€™ll be ok. God bless.

@ronaldmadrid8853

Iโ€™ve missed you guys.

@veemarii

i was worried that if yall came back you would lose your sound, but boy was i wrong. this is my favorite song you've ever put out, it amazes me how unique your music is and i am so incredibly happy we get to have more of it! no one is doing it like u guys are, absolutely beautiful

@Pigeon338

Ive lived this exact song. I am a recovered anorexic guy. Yes I am a guy who had anorexia and still struggle with it. Every lyric fills me with memories. Memories of me waking up in the hospital with an IV. Pacing the floors trying to get steps in just to burn the food the gave me. Stays in a psychward. And eventual inpatient treatment at Mcallum Place in St. Louis when I myself live in West Tennessee. I was there a month before my now girlfriend arrived there. We shared kisses and the voice of our struggles. I broke and fixed myself again. I have multiple times since then. She is still my Love, and its been a year October 4th of 2019. Since my life was forever changed and brightened. This song allows me to see the craziness in my ways and rituals. Im grateful for those who have helped me through my journey so far, and im only 18. However, i know that it was only a split identity, a fault line on the border it was a disorder. And i dont wanna be that type of way.

@leonardoflorese5879

This is like something else. Something special.

@groupergirl

why is this the prettiest thing ever??

@doctorzdes

Am I sleeping rn?
Jesus, guys, we need more
I've been waiting for this about 3 years
We love you, but please don't let us without your masterpieces

@istefini

2020 is being saved by this ep

@stacehann7256

Yasss

@kalebkeller766

โค๏ธโค๏ธ this is one of those songs that gives you chills

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