Friend Of Mine FT Killa C
Lewn Lyrics


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Its not my fault that i feel this way
Everyday i gotta find a way to heal this pain
And ill walk that line til the end of time
In this life that has never been a friend of mine(x2)

Sick of this Life, sick of fucking breathing
soon as i load the gun up
my ass is fucking leaving
i aint acomplished shit cept for felonious crime
and its all real split when i put it in rhyme
ive been thinkin bout it every since i was a kid
and i dont think anybody care if i did
they can find my body laying in the bed
with the sheets blood red and a bullet in my head
i hate you for hating me
i will accept the sorrows of my family
close my fucking casket and put me in the dirt
seein my daughter cry, really makes it hurt

Its not my fault that i feel this way
Everyday i gotta find a way to heal this pain
And ill walk that line til the end of time
In this life that has never been a friend of mine(x2)

This life of mine's flyin by why am i here alive
why am i among the living when i feel so dead inside
my eyes never dry never will i ever try not to be
a better man and try to have a better life
every night i pray to find a way to make it right
i gotta try to stand and fight i gotta try to see the light
everyday a different struggle every time another sign
everyday i feel im loosing it and running out of time
in my mind i am free i can fly i can see
but reality is battling ive had it be in me
each step a little closer to the ending of the pain
everyday im praying on the heavens take me away
somebody's gotta hear me now im barely hanging on
and its scary thinkin maybe theres no body there at all
with the man up in the mirriors tellin me im outta lies
im gonna end it all like critical and die a thousand times
die a thousand times
its not my fault
its not my fault

Its not my fault that i feel this way
Everyday i gotta find a way to heal this pain
And ill walk that line til the end of time
In this life that has never been a friend of mine(x2)
its not my fault its not my fault
its not my fault its not my fault

its too late now i just wanna take it back
as the scene fades away and the pitch goes black
i cant figure out what to say to my maker
i know he aint impressed with my actions for paper
the killa c shit was great while it lasted
the hatred for myself was what got my ass blasted
i cant remember ever in my life being happy
maybe its because i was way too nasty
i did the best i could but i know it wasnt good enough
maybe i shouldve listened when they hammered us in cuffs
now im burnin in the flame dreamin in the pain
if you let me start over lord it wont be the same

Its not my fault that i feel this way
Everyday i gotta find a way to heal this pain
And ill walk that line til the end of time
In this life that has never been a friend of mine(x2)




its not my fault its not my fault
its not my fault its not my fault

Overall Meaning

The song "Friend of Mine" by Lewn ft Killa C portrays the struggles of a troubled individual who feels like he doesn't belong in this world. The lyrics suggest that the singer of the song has experienced a life full of hardship and pain, leading him to contemplate drastic measures to end his suffering. The lyrics "I hate you for hating me, I will accept the sorrows of my family, close my fucking casket and put me in the dirt" imply that the singer feels abandoned and unloved by the people around him, including his own family. At the end of the song, he expresses a desire to start over, indicating a yearning for a fresh start and a new life.


The lyrics of this song convey the emotional turmoil and mental anguish that many people face in their daily lives. The singer of the song appears to be struggling with depression, self-hatred, and a sense of purposelessness, feelings that resonate with many listeners. The chorus of the song, "In this life that has never been a friend of mine," captures the essence of the singer's struggles and his feelings of alienation from the world around him.


Line by Line Meaning

Its not my fault that i feel this way
I cannot control how I feel


Everyday i gotta find a way to heal this pain
I am in constant pain and struggle to find a way to cope


And ill walk that line til the end of time
I will keep trying no matter how difficult it may be


In this life that has never been a friend of mine(x2)
My life has been a constant battle and struggle


Sick of this Life, sick of fucking breathing
I feel overwhelmed with the difficulties of life


soon as i load the gun up my ass is fucking leaving
I am contemplating suicide


i aint accomplished shit except for felonious crime
I regret the mistakes and crimes I have committed


and its all real split when i put it in rhyme
I express my emotions and struggles through my music


ive been thinkin bout it every since i was a kid
These thoughts of pain and suicide have plagued me since childhood


and i dont think anybody care if i did
I feel like no one cares about my struggles


they can find my body laying in the bed with the sheets blood red and a bullet in my head
I have a specific plan for how to take my own life


i hate you for hating me
I am angry at those who judge me and bring negativity into my life


i will accept the sorrows of my family
I feel guilty for the pain I may cause my loved ones if I go through with suicide


close my fucking casket and put me in the dirt
I have accepted death and am ready to die


seein my daughter cry, really makes it hurt
The thought of causing pain to my loved ones, especially my daughter, hurts me deeply


This life of mine's flyin by why am i here alive
I question the purpose of my existence


why am i among the living when i feel so dead inside
I feel emotionally dead despite being physically alive


my eyes never dry never will i ever try not to be a better man and try to have a better life
I refuse to give up and strive to be a better person despite my struggles


every night i pray to find a way to make it right
I turn to religion and hope for guidance and peace


i gotta try to stand and fight i gotta try to see the light
I am determined to keep fighting and find hope in my struggles


everyday a different struggle every time another sign
My struggles and pain seem to never end


everyday i feel im loosing it and running out of time
My struggle with mental health and depression feels never-ending and overwhelming


in my mind i am free i can fly i can see
In my imagination, I am free from my struggles and pain


but reality is battling ive had it be in me
The reality of my struggles is intense and difficult to handle


each step a little closer to the ending of the pain
I see each day as one step closer to finding peace and being free from pain


everyday im praying on the heavens take me away
I am reaching out for help and hoping for relief from my emotional pain


somebody's gotta hear me now im barely hanging on
I am crying out for help and feel like I am about to break


and its scary thinkin maybe theres no body there at all
I fear being alone in my struggles and not having anyone there to help me


with the man up in the mirriors tellin me im outta lies
I feel like I am constantly lying to myself to cope with my struggles


im gonna end it all like critical and die a thousand times
I feel like my struggles are killing me slowly every single day


its too late now i just wanna take it back
I regret the decisions I have made and want to go back in time to fix them


as the scene fades away and the pitch goes black
I feel like my life is fading away and I am losing control


i cant figure out what to say to my maker
I am unsure of how to reconcile my struggles with my faith


i know he aint impressed with my actions for paper
I fear judgement from a higher power because of the mistakes I have made


the killa c shit was great while it lasted
I reminisce about better times in my life


the hatred for myself was what got my ass blasted
My self-loathing and regret led to the pain and struggles I am currently facing


i cant remember ever in my life being happy
I struggle to remember a time when I was truly happy


maybe its because i was way too nasty
I attribute my struggles to my past mistakes and regrets


i did the best i could but i know it wasnt good enough
I tried my best to overcome my struggles but it feels like it was not enough


maybe i shouldve listened when they hammered us in cuffs
I regret not learning from the consequences of my actions in the past


now im burnin in the flame dreamin in the pain
I feel like I am being consumed by my struggles and pain


if you let me start over lord it wont be the same
I wish for a chance to start over and make things right


its not my fault its not my fault its not my fault its not my fault
I am trying to remind myself that I am not entirely responsible for my struggles




Contributed by Julian N. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Comments from YouTube:

josh :#

i miss lewn

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