If I Really Love You
Lexi Jayde Lyrics

Yesterday you told me that you wanna be alone
Yesterday you confided in me that you needed space and time to be by yourself

I could hear the distance in your voice over the phone
Your voice sounded distant over the phone, as if you were pulling away emotionally

You don't say 'I love you' back
You refrain from expressing your love for me in the same way that I do for you

Or let your feelings show
You keep your emotions hidden and don't open up to me

You used to be so good at that
You had no trouble expressing your love and being vulnerable before

But now I never know
I can't tell how you feel or where we stand anymore

I wish you would hold me
I crave physical affection and closeness from you

I wish you would tell me how you feel
I want you to communicate your emotions and thoughts to me honestly

Want you to show me
I need you to demonstrate your love and commitment to me in tangible ways

If anything left in this is real
I question whether our love is still genuine and if it can withstand our current struggles

'Cause, maybe, I'm afraid to
Perhaps, I'm scared to face the reality of losing you or seeing you move on without me

See you dancing on your own
Visualizing you happy and enjoying life without me hurts and makes me question our connection

If I really love you
If my love for you is sincere and selfless

I'll let you go
I'll allow you the freedom to pursue what you need and want, even if that means we part ways

Midnight drives in your old sweatshirts never felt so cold
Memories of our intimate moments together no longer bring me warmth and comfort, rather they feel distant and unfamiliar

And I still hear the stupid songs you showed me everywhere I go
The songs you shared with me have become a painful reminder of our current distance and discordance

I can taste the hesitation running from your lips
I sense your reluctance to speak openly about your feelings and desire to withdraw from our relationship

I can feel it in my bones they're breaking
I sense deep emotional pain and weariness that is affecting me physically

We can't end like this
The unsatisfying and hurtful state of our relationship cannot continue like this

Moments wrapped around romance
Our love has been full of passionate and tender moments

That end with bare sunrises and goodbyes
However, those happy moments have been overshadowed by sad and difficult breakups

Romance so fragile and rare
Our love feels like a precious and vulnerable thing that is hard to come by

That I wonder if it would have the same taste
I question whether our relationship would feel as sweet and special without the ups and downs

If not such a delicacy
If it were not so unique and precious

But I'd still devour you
Despite the challenges, I would still eagerly consume and cherish our love

As I lay here with cold years of wavering emotions
I struggle with many years of emotional ups and downs, which have left me feeling numb and uncertain

And pressed desires of explosions
I have strong desires and passions that I feel are bottled up and smothered

That retreat into dormitory
These desires and emotions seem to withdraw into a state of inactivity and apathy

I wonder are we goin' to fight together
I question whether we will be able to work together to overcome our problems and save our relationship

Or are we two twin souls
Or are we two kindred spirits

Fighting each other for a lifetime?
Bound together in conflict and strife for the rest of our days