Lori McKenna’s first name is actually Lorraine. She is named after the mother she lost when she was only seven, but whose impact on Lori’s life reverberates to this day. In her sixth album, Lorraine, she considers the influence of her mother, who died at roughly the same age Lori is now, as well as her own place in relationship to her husband, family and community. It is her most personal album to date.
On the title track, Lori thinks back to scenes she remembers from her childhood (or thinks she does: “Well I don’t know if this part is true/How memories lie the way they do”) and how they reflect on her mother’s character: hard working, uncomplaining, sacrificing and loving, despite the health challenges that would eventually take her from her family. Lori allows the small details to carry the story. She remembers her mother smiling and dancing to a Judy Garland Carnegie Hall concert recording: “She said her cousin had a balcony seat.” If you lean in closely, you see the portrait of Lorraine taking shape. Her mother found joy in the music and joy that someone close to her had been lucky enough to be there, but no hint of feeling deprived for not experiencing it herself. Lorraine’s place was with her family, and she found contentment there. In the last verse, Lori looks at herself with the hope that she’s worthy of the name she was given, and the recognition that she might just be falling short (“I swear I’ve tried to be worthy of/The name they gave me when I was young/But I ain’t that pretty and I ain’t that brave/My kids have seen me cry/They should have given her name to my sister Marie/That don’t mean a thing to you but it does to me”).
Lori’s unusual combination of professional and personal life, at least in the context of the modern music industry, is well-documented. She grew up in Massachusetts in a musical household. Her father was an excellent singer, and her mother played the piano. Two of her older brothers were songwriters, one of whom (Richard) she considers largely responsible for her career. He accompanied a reluctant Lori to open mic nights and gave her confidence that she was good enough. She began performing her songs in public at age 27, after she and her husband Gene already had three children. She and Gene continue to maintain a happy home in Stoughton, Massachusetts, adding two more children to their full lives. In addition to family, place has an important role in Lori’s songs.
“Buy This Town” almost didn’t make the album. It was written the day after the album was completed, but Lori felt so strongly about the song, she and album producer Barry Dean went back to the studio to record it. It’s a love letter to Stoughton, replete with images of the working class environment and the good, hard-working people that are her neighbors. In the last verse of the song, she writes of a firefighter at the high school football game because his kid is playing. “That’s my neighbor John,” she says, “and his son Lucas is on the football team.” She also speaks about how place plays a role in some of her strongest and most enduring memories. It’s moments like a tearful one at the kitchen sink in the home she shares with Gene that Lori holds most dear (”If I could buy one night, I wouldn’t buy the one you’d think/I’d buy the one when my eyes teared up by the light above the kitchen sink/And you held me tight, and you begged me not to cry/If I could buy the sweetness of one kiss, that’s the one I’d buy/If I could buy one night”). The love of home and community is not some abstraction for Lori. It’s central to who she is.
She eventually became a staple of the Boston folk music scene, where she became friendly with Mary Gauthier. “We were the two old ladies in a sea of young faces,” she jokes. When Gauthier picked up and left for Nashville, she brought Lori’s music to the attention of her publisher. They got her music into the hands of Faith Hill, who fell hard for Lori’s songs. Hill recorded three of them for her album Fireflies. Lori’s way of articulating the love, pain and pathos of domestic life had a huge impact on Hill, and Hill’s very public championing of Lori’s music led other artists to Lori’s songs. Tim McGraw, Carrie Underwood, Alison Krauss, Keith Urban and LeAnn Rimes are among the many that have recorded her songs in recent years.
That Lori is a master at chronicling the small, difficult moments between romantic partners as they navigate their relationships is a big reason her songs have been so popular with other artists. Though she and Gene have a strong and happy marriage, they, like all couples, have their moments when they are not connecting. Lori channels the vulnerability of those moments in songs that give voice to anyone who has felt insecure even in the most committed of relationships. In the lead track of the album, “The Luxury Of Knowing,” the protagonist’s constancy is juxtaposed against her partner’s mercurial nature (“But just when I think you’re a hurricane/You freeze right over and all that rain/Turns to ice and your whole world just starts snowing/And I don’t have the luxury of knowing”), leaving her unable to feel secure in the relationship (“Damn it must be easy/Being in love with someone so blind/Cuz I’ll tell you right now the only thing I really know/Is that you might change your mind”). There are also moments that celebrate the love that accompanies the daily grind. “You Get A Love Song” is a fun romp that reminds us that often there’s no gold star or plaque for just showing up every day for your loved one, but at least for Gene, he gets the starring role in one of his wife’s songs.
The increased acclaim for her song craft led to a record deal with Warner Brothers, who released her 2007 album Unglamorous. Working with Tim McGraw (who co-produced the album), an appearance on Oprah and an opening slot on McGraw and Faith Hill’s Soul2Soul tour were heady experiences, and Lori is grateful for them. “The whole experience was wonderful, and there were several at Warner Brothers that worked so hard for my album,” she says, but there was always a sense that her music and their goals were not going to result in a perfect professional marriage. “Recording in Nashville, as good as the experience has been in many ways, is not exactly the safest way to guard your creative instincts.” Sales levels that would seem astronomical by the standards of the folk community that nurtured her were not enough for a subsequent regime at Warner Brothers, and they parted amicably. “One thing that did come out of that experience was a much deeper confidence in myself as an artist,” says Lori, which was one reason she decided to take the reins back in her professional life. By choice, she has no label and no manager for the first time in her career.
The album closes with a prayer to Lorraine. Lori used to pray to her mother when she was a child: there was a strong sense that Lorraine was watching over her. “I think I made better choices in my life because I felt she was there,” Lori says. “Still Down Here” is a prayer that Lorraine and all the loved ones who leave their earthly burdens behind remember the ones still here on Earth, still in need of their love and guidance. With a daughter so empathetic to the human condition and so loyal and loving to her family and community, one guesses that Lorraine is looking down, very proud.
www.lorimckenna.com
Holy Water
Lori McKenna Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
(recorded live at The Blackthorne Tavern, per liner notes)
by Lori McKenna
Ain't going to sell my soul, well I'm not that dumb
Things are never what they seem.
Down at the cross roads I got better things to sell,
I'm going to sell some of my dreams...
Going to package them up,
Two for a buck,
And with any luck
I'll buy me some Holy Water, gonna to wash me clean,
And that Holy Water is gonna to wash me clean...
Well, I've seen the devil, says he's going to buy me time,
make my dreams come true
I say baby, baby, baby you don't know my kind.
this is what I'm going to do.
Going to package them up,
Two for a buck,
I'm going to sell them cheap and keep the water running.
Gimme some Holy Water, going to wash me clean
And that Holy Water is going to wash me clean...
If you see me with the devil by my side
Well I am guilty by association, I can't lie.
But I can hear their cries and I can hear their screams
I'm going down to the crossroads to sell myself some dreams...
Oh hear me now, hear me now....
I line up with the sinners and wait my time,
saying I'm the one with dreams for sale
Dreams aplenty, two for ten dimes,
buy a lot and they won't fail...
Going to package them up,
Two for a buck,
I'm going to sell them cheap and keep the water running.
Gimme some Holy Water,
You gotta get me some, you gotta get me some
Holy Water, it's going to wash me clean...
And that Holy Water is going to wash me clean...
In Lori McKenna's song Holy Water, the singer finds herself at the crossroads, contemplating selling her dreams in exchange for Holy Water to wash herself clean. She boldly claims that she will not sell her soul but instead will sell her dreams, packaging them up for two dollars a pop. She is determined to keep the water running, as she desperately hopes that the Holy Water will wash away her sins and cleanse her. Even though she has seen the devil and is guilty by association, she is not deterred from her mission of selling her dreams to get what she wants. The singer acknowledges the importance of the Holy Water in her search for redemption, and the song ends with her plea for someone to get her some of that water.
The lyrics of Holy Water are open to interpretation, but it seems that the song is about a person's struggle to resist temptation and finding redemption in religion. The singer is fully aware of the risks of associating with the devil but is willing to take the gamble. In her search for grace, she is willing to sell her dreams and buy Holy Water. The choice to pick dreams over a soul is intriguing, as it suggests that the singer values her aspirations more than her spiritual well-being. She acknowledges her wrongdoing and accepts her punishment despite her desperation to be clean.
Line by Line Meaning
Ain't going to sell my soul, well I'm not that dumb
I am not foolish enough to sell my soul.
Things are never what they seem.
Things are not always as they appear at first glance.
Down at the cross roads I got better things to sell,
I have better things to sell down at the crossroads.
I'm going to sell some of my dreams...
I am going to sell some of my dreams.
Going to package them up,
I am going to package my dreams
Two for a buck,
I will sell two of my dreams for one dollar.
And with any luck
Hopefully,
I'll buy me some Holy Water, gonna to wash me clean,
I will purchase some Holy Water to cleanse me.
Well, I've seen the devil, says he's going to buy me time,
I have seen the devil who offered me some time.
make my dreams come true
He said he would make my dreams come true.
I say baby, baby, baby you don't know my kind.
I told him he did not understand me.
this is what I'm going to do.
I know what I need to do.
I'm going to sell them cheap and keep the water running.
I will sell my dreams inexpensively and keep buying Holy Water.
Gimme some Holy Water, going to wash me clean
Give me Holy Water to clean me.
If you see me with the devil by my side
If you see me with the devil, don't judge me.
Well I am guilty by association, I can't lie.
I am associated with the devil and cannot deny it.
But I can hear their cries and I can hear their screams
I can hear the cries and screams of those in need.
I'm going down to the crossroads to sell myself some dreams...
I am going to the crossroads to sell my dreams.
Oh hear me now, hear me now....
Listen to me carefully.
I line up with the sinners and wait my time,
I stand with the sinners and wait for my turn.
saying I'm the one with dreams for sale
I announce that I am selling dreams.
Dreams aplenty, two for ten dimes,
I have many dreams, two for ten cents.
buy a lot and they won't fail...
Buy many dreams and they will not disappoint.
You gotta get me some, you gotta get me some
You must get me some Holy Water.
Holy Water, it's going to wash me clean...
Holy Water will cleanse me.
And that Holy Water is going to wash me clean...
That Holy Water will cleanse me.
Contributed by Violet Y. Suggest a correction in the comments below.