Drowning
Lucidious Lyrics

I keep calling
I continue to reach out for help

I keep falling down I'm trying to get up
I continue to struggle and try to rise again

Can you save me
I am in desperate need of someone's aid

I don't know if I can do this on my own
I am uncertain if I can handle this situation without assistance

You keep stalling almost every time you go
The person being asked for help is hesitant and not reliable

I don't know if I can even stay afloat
I am unsure if I can keep my head above water

Another night where we disconnect
We are having another evening of being disconnected from each other

Say we do but don't show respect
We claim to have respect but do not actually demonstrate it

I'm drowning out in way too much stress
I am overwhelmed by stress to the point of drowning

Your heart is one that I can't protect
I am unable to protect the heart of the person I care about

Can't take the love that I offer you
The person I care about cannot accept my love

Can't feel affection you offer me
I cannot feel the affection the person I care about offers

It's hard to fight on this battlefield and be the man that I gotta be
It is difficult to be a strong, capable person in the midst of conflict

Then I'm right back with a note pad feeling so mad I've had
I often turn to writing when I am angry and frustrated

Depressed days and I really want my life back
I am struggling with depression and feeling like I have lost control of my life

Heart cold one day I'll need a bypass
My heart has grown cold and I may eventually need medical intervention

I'm living sidetracked
I am living in a state where I am not focused on my goals

Feeling hijacked
I feel like I am being taken over by my negative thoughts and emotions

And I don't get sleep without a nightcap
I struggle to fall asleep without alcohol or some other aid

I'm thinking that I'm on a different flight path
I feel like I am on a different course in life than those around me

I'm numb at the bottom of the bucket with a white flag I don't wanna fight back nah
I feel defeated and hopeless, and do not want to keep fighting anymore

You keep stalling almost every time you go
Again expressing that the person being asked for help is not reliable

I used to believe I had to be
I used to think I had to act a certain way

A perfect person I had to keep
I thought I had to be perfect to be accepted

The real me locked in I could not compete
I kept my true self locked away and hidden

Didn't love myself I was not complete
I did not love myself and felt like something was missing

I drift off into the distance and never listen when you trying to figure out what this is
I often zone out and do not pay attention when someone is trying to communicate with me

I've taken a road I could not have predicted
I am on a path in life that I never could have thought would be mine

Seeking in myself trying to find where bliss is
I am searching within myself to find happiness

Deep in my bones I can feel the trauma
I have experienced deep emotional pain that still affects me

Try to feel good but I'm used to drama
I try to feel happy but am used to being in stressful or dramatic situations

Tend to find peace when I lie in silence
I feel at peace when I am alone with my thoughts

Either that or in a beat when I meet with karma
I also find peace when I feel like justice is being served

I created a war that's filling with broken apologies
I have created conflict in my relationships that is difficult to repair

And if I drift off to the deepest of waters I understand that you can't follow me
I understand that there are some things I am going through that my loved ones cannot fully understand or fix

Will you follow me
Will you still be there for me even when I am going through something difficult

Yeah
Acknowledging the previous line

You reach me
Acknowledging the help that is given

When the waves come crashing down
When life gets tough and everything seems to be falling apart

Pull me under and surround me
Stay by my side and support me even when things are difficult

Will you reach out
Asking for continued help and support during hard times

I guess we don't know where this might go
Admitting uncertainty about the future of a relationship

But I know that we're stuck in a cycle
Acknowledging that there are patterns in the relationship

It feels like we're drifting apart
Feeling like the relationship is becoming distant

An ocean between us in need of a lifeboat
Identifying the distance between the two people and the need for help

But I'll never let go
Affirming commitment and the desire to hold on to the relationship

I'm with you together as long as we're walking this tightrope
As long as we are both committed, we can make it through anything

I'm drowning and nobody ever tries to reach me
Feeling alone and like no one is trying to help

Tide is coming and the waters getting too deep
Saying that the situation is getting worse and harder to handle

Why can't you hear me when I'm screaming that I can't breathe
Asking for someone to listen and take notice of how hard things are right now