E.R.N.I.E.
Madness Lyrics


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I am the bringer of your wishes
Your savior from doing work
The washer of your dishes
And you'll still get your midday perk
Estate agent your mansion
And pot of gold
All the home comforts
Before you're getting tired and old

One more try
Try to get what you've never had
Five more bob
For the whole world that can't be bad
We can't all win
Look it's happening
The future's looking not so bleak
A thousand winners every week [x2]

So when you hear me coming
Along halls and up the stairs (E.R.N.I.E.)
In the back of teapots
In the cupboard, under chairs (E.R.N.I.E.)
Forget all your wives tales
Of forecasts and dividends (E.R.N.I.E.)
When E.R.N.I.E. feels vibrations
Only pays out to trusted friends

One more try
Try to get what you've never had
Five more bob
For the whole world that can't be bad
We can't all win
Look it's happening
The future's looking not so bleak
A thousand winners every week [x2]

Congratulations you've just won
A five thousand pound premium bond

Keep your hand on the bottle
And your eyes glued upon the set (E.R.N.I.E.)
When the score cards come up
Could be you for the big one next (E.R.N.I.E.)
Publicity, no thank you
On the front page of the Currant Bun (E.R.N.I.E.)
They think you stink
But in the pub you'll be number one

One more try
Try to get what you've never had
Five more bob
For the whole world that can't be bad
We can't all win
Look it's happening




The future's looking not so bleak
A thousand winners every week [x4]

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of the song E.R.N.I.E by Madness talks about a fictional character named E.R.N.I.E, considered as the bringer of wishes and savior from work. The song portrays E.R.N.I.E as the one who can provide all the comforts in life, such as a mansion, pot of gold, and household help. The song also talks about the concept of winning and the desire to get more in life. The lyrics suggest that winning is not always possible for everyone, and though the future may not look too bright, there's always a possibility of winning something every week.


The song also refers to E.R.N.I.E's physical presence, with the lyrics suggesting that E.R.N.I.E can be found hiding in the back of teapots, in cupboards and under chairs. The lyrics also talk about the hypocrisy of people, as they try to hide their excitement for winning from the public eye, but in reality, they are happy to be the number one in their social circles.


Overall, the song E.R.N.I.E by Madness portrays the desire for a better life, the concept of luck, and the hypocrisy of people who try to maintain a social image regarding their winnings.


Line by Line Meaning

I am the bringer of your wishes
I am the one who can fulfill your every desire


Your savior from doing work
I can save you from having to do any hard work


The washer of your dishes
I can even wash your dirty dishes for you


And you'll still get your midday perk
You can still enjoy your afternoon break, even with all this help


Estate agent your mansion
I can help you find and purchase your dream home


And pot of gold
I can even help you find a pot of gold


All the home comforts
I can provide you with all the comforts of home


Before you're getting tired and old
Before you start feeling old and tired


One more try
Take one more chance


Try to get what you've never had
Try to obtain something you've never had before


Five more bob
Spend an extra five pennies


For the whole world that can't be bad
For an experience that is sure to be amazing


We can't all win
Sadly, not everyone can be a winner


Look it's happening
But right now, someone is winning


The future's looking not so bleak
The future is starting to look hopeful


A thousand winners every week
Every week, there are thousands of winners


When you hear me coming
When you hear the sound of me approaching


Along halls and up the stairs (E.R.N.I.E.)
In and around your home, even in places you wouldn't expect (referring to the machine E.R.N.I.E.)


In the back of teapots
Even hiding in the back of your teapot


In the cupboard, under chairs (E.R.N.I.E.)
Even stashed away in your cupboards and hidden under your chairs


Forget all your wives tales
Put aside any old superstitions


Of forecasts and dividends (E.R.N.I.E.)
Don't worry about making predictions or investments (referring to E.R.N.I.E.)


When E.R.N.I.E. feels vibrations
When E.R.N.I.E. senses movements


Only pays out to trusted friends
It will only give rewards to those it trusts


Congratulations you've just won
Congratulations, you are a winner!


A five thousand pound premium bond
You have won a premium bond worth £5000


Keep your hand on the bottle
Keep your hand on your drink


And your eyes glued upon the set (E.R.N.I.E.)
And keep your eyes focused on the television (referring to E.R.N.I.E.)


When the score cards come up
When the scorecards are shown


Could be you for the big one next (E.R.N.I.E.)
You could be the next big winner (referring to E.R.N.I.E.)


Publicity, no thank you
No thank you to any fame or publicity


On the front page of the Currant Bun (E.R.N.I.E.)
On the front page of a newspaper (referring to E.R.N.I.E.)


They think you stink
They may not like you


But in the pub you'll be number one
But among your friends, you'll be seen as a winner




Lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
Written by: MARK WILLIAM BEDFORD, CHRISTOPHER JOHN FOREMAN, CATHAL JOSEPH SMYTH, DANIEL MARK WOODGATE, MICHAEL BARSON, LEE JAY THOMPSON, GRAHAM MCPHERSON

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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Comments from YouTube:

London 64

I had the enormous pleasure to hear the Band play the whole album live at the House Of Fun Weekender 2016.

ABSOLUTELY Brilliant.

james D

This album was class and still is class ....

Mr Blue

Haven't heard this for years. Absolutely was the best Madness album by far. My mum bought me an "ernie" when I was born in 66. I was going through some of her old stuff(she died over 20 years ago) a few weeks ago and found it.

johnny vito

my favourite madness track ever! brilliant keyboards! love it mush!

The Modster

My favourite Madness Tune always loved it my childhood 👌

Andrew Davis

What can I say brilliant song and band, still brings a smile to my face when life get youth. God bless em go on madness

paul drummyb

First album I bought. Loved and still love it.

smackmyfishup666

Absolutely and 7 are brilliant albums !

Chili Head

This Tune could of been a single!

john vaughan

best album they made - love it - my childhood!

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