"There’s like 5,000 lyrics in this song. It’s all of my personality and everything that was going on in my life at the time. The first verse and the first chorus were actually written for Trying [the Apple TV+ comedy; Peters wrote the Season 2 soundtrack], but it wasn’t the vibe for it, so I took it back. This song is chaotic and bitchy and passive-aggressive and really flawed."
—via Apple Music
I’m Trying
Maisie Peters Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Boy and a girl broke up, yeah, it's two a penny
And I been tryna make a big step forward
Saw you, it was awkward
Nothing like I thought would happen happened
I was so in love
And that don't come off in the wash
'Cause you're seeing someone pretty
And I hate her guts, so
I'll be telling you she's nice on the bus home
We were bad but we're gonna be good
It didn't work like I thought it would
And I resent you just a little if I'm honest
But one of us has gotta try to keep a promise
And I swore that I'd swallow my pride
And you swore you would do better this time
Well, I might be bitter and twisted
And broken and petty and lying
But at least I'm trying
At least I'm trying
At least I'm trying
Three shots, lemon drops
One for being lost and alone in your early twenties
One for being obsessed with someone who puts you secondary
One for calling guys with guitars in a cemetery
Just me?
Okay, if I'm being frank
I want a sorry but I'll settle for a handshake
'Cause I'm the baby
But I'm gonna be the bigger man, babe
So many blank slates I could build a whole fucking house
We were bad but we're gonna be good
It didn't work like I thought it would
And I resent you just a little if I'm honest
But one of us has gotta try to keep a promise
And I swore that I'd swallow my pride
And you swore you would do better this time
Well, I might be bitter and twisted
And broken and petty and lying
But at least I'm trying
At least I'm trying
Not friends
No, we're somewhere in between
'Cause you're awful and I miss you
And I killed you in my dream last night
Even then you didn't care
It's a low when even in my dreams you still don't want me there
Got friends
Got at least a healthy five
Yeah, some people think I'm funny, baby
Don't look so surprised
We think that your girlfriend is a bore
But we're nice to her in public
'Cause we're grown up and mature
Not friends
'Cause when I asked you on the train why you hurt me
And you couldn't really actually explain, I cried
Then I told you it was cool
God! You haven't changed at all
We were bad but we're gonna be good
It didn't work like I thought it would
And I resent you just a little if I'm honest
But one of us has gotta try to keep a promise
And I swore that I'd swallow my pride
And you swore you would do better this time
Well, I might be bitter and twisted
And broken and petty and lying
And you might be awful like all of the time, yeah
It's almost inspiring
But at least I'm trying
At least I'm trying
At least I'm trying
Maisie Peters's song "I'm Trying" delves into the aftermath of a breakup and the emotional journey of trying to move on from a failed relationship. The lyrics capture the vulnerability and resentment felt by the singer as they navigate the complexities of their emotions.
The song begins with the acknowledgment that breakups are a common occurrence, but the pain and longing still linger. The singer had hoped to take a big step forward in their life, but when they unexpectedly encounter their former partner, the situation becomes awkward. The subsequent lines express the lingering love that hasn't faded away, even though the singer wishes it would. They admit to feeling bitter towards the person's new love interest and even pretend to compliment her when they talk on the bus. This showcases a mix of jealousy, hurt, and attempts at maturity.
The chorus emphasizes the desire for growth and improvement. Both parties in the relationship had envisioned a better outcome, but it didn't happen as expected. Despite feeling resentment and pettiness, the singer is determined to try and keep the promise they made to themselves. They swallow their pride while acknowledging their own flaws and attempt to move forward.
The second verse explores the singer's coping mechanisms. They turn to alcohol to dull the pain and distract themselves from their feelings of being lost and alone. They also mention being obsessed with someone who doesn't prioritize them. The reference to calling guys with guitars in a cemetery suggests a futile attempt to find solace in people who might share their pain. The singer admits that all they really want is an apology or a simple gesture of reconciliation, but they are willing to settle for a simple handshake. They strive to be the bigger person, despite feeling the weight of their emotions.
The bridge reveals the conflicting emotions of the singer. They acknowledge the limbo they're in with their former partner, not quite friends but more than strangers. They admit to missing the person despite acknowledging their flaws and even dream of killing them as a representation of their deeply rooted hurt. Despite this, they still long for a place in the person's life. The singer has found solace in the support of their friends and their own sense of humor, but they still carry the pain of the unresolved feelings.
Overall, "I'm Trying" captures the struggles of navigating through the aftermath of a breakup. It portrays the conflicting emotions, the desire for growth, and the continuous effort to move forward despite the pain and resentment.
Line by Line Meaning
Boy and a girl broke up, yeah, it's two a penny
A common occurrence, two people in a relationship ended their connection
And I been tryna make a big step forward
I have been attempting to move forward in my life
Saw you, it was awkward
When I saw you, the situation felt uncomfortable
Nothing like I thought would happen happened
Unexpected events took place, far from what I had imagined
I was so in love
I had deep feelings of affection towards you
And that don't come off in the wash
Those feelings cannot easily be erased or forgotten
Kinda hope it does though
Although, I somewhat wish it could be washed away
'Cause you're seeing someone pretty
Because you are involved with someone attractive
And I hate her guts, so
I strongly dislike her
I'll be telling you she's nice on the bus home
On my way home, I will pretend that I think she is pleasant
We were bad but we're gonna be good
Our past relationship may have had issues, but we will improve
It didn't work like I thought it would
Our relationship did not unfold as I had anticipated
And I resent you just a little if I'm honest
To be truthful, I hold some slight anger towards you
But one of us has gotta try to keep a promise
One of us must make an effort to fulfill a commitment
And I swore that I'd swallow my pride
I made a promise to suppress my ego
And you swore you would do better this time
You made a commitment to improve in our relationship
Well, I might be bitter and twisted
I may feel resentful and distorted
And broken and petty and lying
I am emotionally damaged, childish, and dishonest
But at least I'm trying
Nevertheless, I am making an effort
Three shots, lemon drops
Consuming three alcoholic drinks called lemon drops
One for being lost and alone in your early twenties
One drink symbolizes feeling directionless and isolated in your early twenties
One for being obsessed with someone who puts you secondary
Another drink represents being fixated on someone who prioritizes you less
One for calling guys with guitars in a cemetery
An additional drink signifies the act of contacting musicians at a graveyard
Just me?
Am I the only one who has done this?
Okay, if I'm being frank
Alright, to be completely honest
I want a sorry but I'll settle for a handshake
I desire an apology, but I will accept a friendly gesture
'Cause I'm the baby
Because I am the one who seeks validation and care
But I'm gonna be the bigger man, babe
However, I will choose to be more mature, my dear
So many blank slates I could build a whole fucking house
I have numerous opportunities to start anew and create a strong foundation
Not friends
We are not friends
No, we're somewhere in between
Rather, we exist in a state between friendship and something else
'Cause you're awful and I miss you
Because you are terrible, yet I still long for your presence
And I killed you in my dream last night
In my dream last night, I imagined causing your demise
Even then you didn't care
Even in that imaginary situation, you showed no concern
It's a low when even in my dreams you still don't want me there
It is disheartening that even in my dreams, you reject my presence
Got friends
I have friends
Got at least a healthy five
I have at least a solid group of five close friends
Yeah, some people think I'm funny, baby
Yes, some individuals find me humorous, darling
Don't look so surprised
Do not appear shocked by this
We think that your girlfriend is a bore
We find your girlfriend uninteresting
But we're nice to her in public
However, we maintain a polite facade when interacting with her in public
'Cause we're grown up and mature
Because we are adult and mature individuals
Not friends
We are not friends
'Cause when I asked you on the train why you hurt me
Because when I inquired about why you caused me pain on the train
And you couldn't really actually explain, I cried
And you were unable to offer a valid explanation, which resulted in me crying
Then I told you it was cool
Afterward, I reassured you that everything was fine
God! You haven't changed at all
Goodness! You have not undergone any transformation
And you might be awful like all of the time, yeah
And you may be terrible consistently, yes
It's almost inspiring
It is nearly impressive
But at least I'm trying
Nevertheless, I am making an effort
At least I'm trying
At the very least, I am attempting
At least I'm trying
At the very least, I am making an effort
Lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Universal Music Publishing Group
Written by: Joe Rubel, Maisie Hannah Peters
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
AGGABAO, John Uriel V.
Not friends
No, we're somewhere in between
'Cause you're awful and I miss you and I killed you in my dream last night
Even then you didn't care
It's a low when even in my dreams you still don't want me there
Got friends, got at least a healthy five
Yeah, some people think I'm funny, baby, don't look so surprised (Some people think I'm funny!)
FUCKING LOVE THIS BRIDGE
Aaliyah Patel
How does she write lyrics THIS WELL?! Love how all her songs are relatable and savage at the same time! I live for the british humour and sarcasm she incorporates into her songs so well. God Maisie- I cant pick a fave song from this album- they’re all bops!
Oceanside Tunes
With a tad help from the great Ed Sheeran. Amazing writing on the album by both of them (and others including Snow Patrol)
Maura
"Even in my dreams you still don't want me there" hit so hard and then came, "some people think I´m funny, baby don't look so surprised" and mended me with a smile. <3
Risako
You forgot still.
Christina Miller
I don't know if people understand how hard a song like this is to sing well. It's difficult to be fast AND articulate and not run out of breath as well as bounce around so much with the notes without being sharp or flat
geegeezlouis86
This bridge is Swiftian and I'm obsessed with the emotion in "you couldn't actually explain"
Tali W
😍😍😍
𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑖𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑔𝑜 🪐
yaaass im a swiftie too and i love that this reminds me of Queen Tay a bit
Im Bee
The "at least I'm trying" reminded me of "this is me trying" by Taylor Swift, but the vibe is completely different and I STAN. I love seeing how the same lyric could fit two completely different songs.
Cp.x.20
It's the way that Taylor's "this is me trying' is almost a mourning call, the way she sings it like a last resort before a breakdown, while Maisie sings 'at least I'm trying!' The way you'd snark at a friend while helping them move furniture, or sarcastically snap at someone slacking off 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 it's about the ~vibes~