Demons
Merkules Lyrics

I've been falling asleep with all of my demons
His inner demons are haunting him, and he can't get a break from them even when he's asleep.

They've been haunting my dreams and I can't think straight cause they won't stop screaming
The demons in his dreams are causing him to lose focus and clarity, and they won't let him rest.

They keep talking to me but I can't tell em shit cause they can't keep a secret
His demons are constantly talking to him, but he can't confide in them because they can't be trusted.

What the fuck am I to do?
He feels helpless and overwhelmed by his demons, and he doesn't know how to deal with them.

When there's nothing left
He feels like he's reached his breaking point and has nothing left to give.

I don't want to feel shit
He's tired of feeling pain and wants to numb himself from it.

Someone must've hit a kill switch
He feels like someone or something has turned off his emotions.

They don't ask about the problems that I deal with
People around him don't understand or care about the personal issues he's facing.

Fuck all of this money
He doesn't care about the fame or fortune that comes with his success.

I keep having these flashbacks
He's haunted by memories of his past mistakes or traumatic events.

They remind me of my problems
The flashbacks trigger his issues and make him feel overwhelmed.

I know it's probably my last chance to change em
He's afraid that he won't have another opportunity to fix his mistakes or move forward from his issues.

But even if I do it my past can't erase it
He knows that even if he tries to fix things, the consequences of his past actions will still exist.

My demons tend to get the best
His demons have the power to control and overwhelm him.

Tell me when I get depressed
He's looking for someone to help him and notice when he's struggling.

I've been stabbed in the back with a chainsaw
He's been hurt and betrayed in a very painful and violent way.

Even if I do it my past can't erase it
He knows that even if he tries to fix things, the consequences of his past actions will still exist.

They recognize me cause they see me on the internet
People know him because of his internet presence and success.

They think I owe em something
Some people believe he has a debt to pay or something to prove because of his fame.

I can't deal with all the disrespect
He's tired of people disrespecting him and not seeing him as a person.

Sick to my stomach
He feels physically ill and nauseous because of the stress and pressure he's experiencing.

When I feel it I just disconnect
When he feels overwhelmed, he removes himself from the situation or disconnects emotionally.

Acting like I'm happy starts to feel like it's my day job
He's tired of pretending to be happy and forcing a public persona.

But just as long as there's a purpose to it all
As long as he has a reason or goal, he'll keep pushing forward despite the difficulties.

I'll keep touring, working hard, writing verses to these songs
He's committed to creating music and performing even when it's emotionally difficult for him.

Far from perfect, every person has their flaws
He recognizes that he's not perfect and that everyone has their own issues to deal with.

And mine is I'm an addict still searching for a cause
He struggles with addiction and is trying to find a reason or source for his problems.

I know they judge me for mistakes that I've made
He's aware that people criticize or judge him for his past mistakes.

Since I've gained all this fame
His fame and success have made him a target for criticism and scrutiny.

Shit just ain't been the same
His life has been changed and impacted in negative ways by his fame and success.

I came in the game to pave a lane for my name
He wanted to make a name for himself and succeed in the music industry.

And it's painful to say it puts restraints on my brain
His success and public image put pressure on him and limit his personal choices.

I know its worth it cause I get to tell my story
Despite the difficulties, he believes it's worth it to be able to share his music and personal experiences with others.

I'm at a point where the industry can't ignore me
He's reached a level of success where he can't be overlooked or ignored in the music industry.

I never had the mainstream media to endorse me
He didn't have mainstream support or recognition when he started his music career.

I did this all by being myself and y'all are corny
He achieved success by being authentic and true to himself, and he thinks others are fake or inauthentic.

So every kid thats listening to this song I hope you find a message I've written within it all
He wants his music to have a positive impact and offer guidance or inspiration to his listeners.

If no one's ever there to help pick you up when you fall
He recognizes that sometimes people don't have support or help when they need it the most.

I promise you're not alone
He wants his listeners to know that they're not alone in their struggles.

Play this shit and just hit the wall
He wants people to release their emotions and frustrations when they listen to his music.

I know you're listening for something to relate to
He knows that his listeners are looking for something to connect with and understand.

I know the feeling like the whole world hates you
He understands the feeling of being unwanted or unloved by those around you.

You thought it was a phase so you pretend you're in a great mood
He knows that sometimes people fake happiness or positivity to hide their true emotions.

I know it hurts to see reflections of yourself
Seeing his own flaws and mistakes can be painful and difficult.

Cause the person that you see is not like everybody else
His struggles and issues are unique and different from what others might be going through.

So you try and you try but it never seems to help
Even when he tries to fix things or improve his situation, it doesn't always work out.

So you questioning your worth cause you're so fed up with the guilt
He feels guilty and ashamed of his past mistakes, which impacts his self-worth and self-esteem.

But you're not the only one who's going through regret
He wants his listeners to know that others are going through similar issues and regretting their mistakes.

You're not the only one that no one seems to get
He understands the feeling of not being understood or supported by others.

You're not the only one who's so close to the edge
He knows that others are also struggling and on the brink of breaking down.

And if you slip it's over for you so you cope with it instead
He recognizes the severity of his struggles and how he needs to find ways to cope and manage it himself.

I can promise you that nobody is perfect
He wants his listeners to know that everyone has flaws and imperfections.

And you overthink the little shit you always so concerned with
He knows that people can get caught up in minor details and overthink things, causing unnecessary stress and anxiety.

So you lock yourself inside every night and close the curtains
He understands the tendency to isolate oneself and withdraw from others.

And you're screaming out loud but its like no one even heard it
He feels like his cries for help or attention are going unheard or unnoticed by others.

So much anxiety inside you don't know what to do
He understands the overwhelming feeling of anxiety and being unsure of how to handle it.

Been lied to so much you don't think you even want the truth
He's been deceived or betrayed so many times that he's become disillusioned and doesn't trust the truth.

But next time I see all my demons, it's on site
He's determined to face his demons and overcome them, no matter how difficult it may be.

Next time I see all my demons, it's on site yeah
He's ready to confront and defeat his personal struggles and move forward with his life.