But Not For Me
Natalie Merchant Lyrics


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They're writing songs of love
But not for me.
A lucky star's above
But not for me.

With love to lead the way
I've found more skies of gray
Than any Russian play
Could guarantee.

I was a fool to fall
And get that way
High ho alas and
Also lackaday.

Although I can't dismiss
The memory of his kiss
I guess he's not for me.

I know that love's a game
I'm puzzled all the same
Was I the moth or flame
I'm all at sea.

It all began so well
But what an end.
This time a gal could sure
Use a friend

When every happy plot




Ends in a marriage knot
And there's no knot for me.

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of Natalie Merchant's But Not For Me express a profound sense of loneliness and unrequited love. The song describes the writer's feelings of exclusion and estrangement from the joy of love, represented by the fact that others are writing songs about it, but not for her. While others have a lucky star above, the writer feels lost and alone, unable to find happiness in the same way.


The writer's disillusionment with love is evident in the line, "With love to lead the way, I've found more skies of gray than any Russian play could guarantee." The reference to Russian plays suggests a sense of fatalism and hopelessness, indicating that the writer has lost faith in the idea of romantic love altogether. The phrase "High ho alas and also lackaday" further emphasizes the writer's melancholy and resignation.


The song's message is particularly poignant because it conveys a sense of universality - that many people have experienced the same sense of isolation and disappointment in love. The final lines of the song, "When every happy plot ends in a marriage knot and there's no knot for me," encapsulate this sense of isolation perfectly. The writer feels excluded from the happiness that others seem to find so easily.


Line by Line Meaning

They're writing songs of love
Others are creating romantic music


But not for me.
However, their songs don't relate to my situation


A lucky star's above
Fortune seems to be smiling upon others


But not for me.
But I haven't received any luck


With love to lead the way
Despite being in love


I've found more skies of gray
My life is full of difficulties and sorrows


Than any Russian play
Even Russian tragedies can't compare


Could guarantee.
They don't offer a solution or provide consolation


I was a fool to fall
I made a mistake falling in love


And get that way
Letting myself become vulnerable and emotional


High ho alas and
Expressing disappointment and regret


Also lackaday.
Feeling sorrowful and unfortunate


Although I can't dismiss
Despite my best efforts


The memory of his kiss
I still hold onto the memory of his affection


I guess he's not for me.
But I know he's not suitable for me


I know that love's a game
I understand that romantic relationships can be tricky and can lead to heartbreak


I'm puzzled all the same
Despite knowing this, I'm still confused and uncertain


Was I the moth or flame
Did I fall for him or did he lead me on?


I'm all at sea.
I'm lost and unsure


It all began so well
The relationship started off promising


But what an end.
But unfortunately it ended badly


This time a gal could sure
This time, I could really use


Use a friend
A supportive companion


When every happy plot
Despite every positive movie or story


Ends in a marriage knot
The happy ending revolves around a wedding


And there's no knot for me.
But unfortunately, I'm not part of that happy ending




Lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc.
Written by: GEORGE GERSHWIN, IRA GERSHWIN

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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