Bowling for Midgets
Nuclear Rabbit Lyrics


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Roly-Poly dwarves
Rolling all around, knocking over pins, it's a New York sin
Roly-poly dwarves
Jobless by the hordes,
Little people longing to be thrown, employed, somewhat annoyed
Sorry little dwarves

Steroid pumping men
Throw him as far as you can
Soaring through the air
No other sport compares

Suspended by a hook
Awaiting to be flung, mighty warrior throws them one by one
Grubby hobbit bum
Surely a sight to behold, they look quite bold
Sorry little dwarves

Balded bearded athlete
Stubby fingers, shrunken feat
This sport would not be known
If they were fully grown

Infamous New York game
A midget put to shame
Dr. Ruth agrees,
"This sport should not be ceased"

Toss a little man,
Rebounding on the floor like a loony-goony bird you can't ignore
Roly-poly can-can
Enjoy it while you can,
This midget sport will not expand, not it's permanently banned
Sorry, little dwarves

The future it looks grim
Dwarf tossing Tiny Tim




Illegal in fifty states
Unfortunate midget traits

Overall Meaning

The song "Bowling for Midgets" by Nuclear Rabbit is a witty and satirical take on the controversial sport of dwarf tossing. The lyrics describe the participants of the sport, both the little people themselves referred to as "roly-poly dwarves", and the burly men who throw them as "steroid pumping men". The song highlights the absurdity and cruelty of the practice, portraying it as a sin in New York and stating that the dwarves are jobless and longing to be thrown, somewhat annoyed.


The lyrics describe how the dwarves are suspended by a hook and thrown one by one by mighty warriors who are described as throwing them as far as they can, soaring through the air. Despite being a sight to behold and looking quite bold, the dwarves are put to shame in this infamous New York game. The song also portrays the participants of the sport as having odd physical traits, such as a balded bearded athlete and a grubby hobbit bum.


The song takes a humorous and sarcastic tone, driving home the message that dwarf tossing is a cruel and barbaric practice. The lyrics suggest that it should be banned, and leave a grim outlook for the future of these unfortunate individuals.


Line by Line Meaning

Roly-Poly dwarves
Plump little people


Rolling all around, knocking over pins, it's a New York sin
Playing the New York game of bowling for dwarves, rolling them around to knock over pins, is frowned upon


Jobless by the hordes,
The little people being used for this game are often without employment


Little people longing to be thrown, employed, somewhat annoyed
These dwarves wish to be employed, but likely not as objects for this game and are a bit upset about it


Sorry little dwarves
Pity for the situation the little people have been put in


Steroid pumping men
Men taking steroids, likely to enhance their ability to throw the dwarves farther


Throw him as far as you can
They are being thrown as far as possible without regard for their well-being


Soaring through the air
The dwarves being hurled through the air


No other sport compares
This sport is not comparable to any other, for multiple reasons


Suspended by a hook
The dwarves are being held up by a hook, waiting to be launched


Awaiting to be flung, mighty warrior throws them one by one
Ready to be thrown, the one doing the throwing feels like a hero launching these little people one by one


Grubby hobbit bum
Reference to hobbits but applied to the little people being used for the game, making them sound unkempt and dirty


Surely a sight to behold, they look quite bold
Despite the look, it's not necessarily great that they are being thrown in this fashion


Balded bearded athlete
A man likely seen in strength sports, in this case, bald with a beard


Stubby fingers, shrunken feat
His fingers are short and stumpy, and his feet are also small and snubbed


This sport would not be known
The sport of dwarf tossing would not exist if dwarves were average height


If they were fully grown
Applies to the little people, meaning if they were average height, this would not be happening to them


Infamous New York game
The (infamous) game of dwarf tossing in New York


A midget put to shame
The usage of a person with these traits as an object of amusement is shameful


Dr. Ruth agrees, "This sport should not be ceased"
Dr. Ruth, known for discussing sex-related topics, has no opinion on the sport of dwarf tossing continuing


Toss a little man,
Throwing the little people


Rebounding on the floor like a loony-goony bird you can't ignore
After being thrown, the dwarves bounce around on the floor in a way that is hard to ignore


Roly-poly can-can
Similar to a dance but describes the activities of the dwarves being tossed around


Enjoy it while you can,
Possibly, enjoy this sport of dwarf tossing before it becomes illegal or is stopped


This midget sport will not expand, not it's permanently banned
Dwarf tossing is a harmful and dangerous activity, and it is not going to expand, but rather be banned permanently


The future it looks grim
The future of dwarf tossing looks bleak or grim


Dwarf tossing Tiny Tim
A well-known character from a Christmas story and likely used here to introduce the idea of a little person used for sport


Illegal in fifty states
Many states have laws against this activity


Unfortunate midget traits
Calling dwarfism 'unfortunate' and thinking it is okay to use these little people for ugly 'sport' activities like dwarf tossing.




Lyrics © O/B/O APRA AMCOS

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