I'm Not Okay
Pasteldrip Lyrics


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Feel my eyes sink back in ma' skull
No drug could play me a fool
I'm so tired of waistin' my time
When there's no one here by my side
Just when I thought everything's fine
Something's gotta get on my mind
Keep my head held high they said
But these voices say I'm better off dead
Benzos in my head
I'm doin' fine, but not invincible
Got no recollection bout the things that happened years ago
I could use a sign baby, hope it ain't impossible, if I could save a life
It'd be nothing but to feel
My eyes sink back in ma' skull
No one can escape this hell hole
I'm so tired of waistin' my time
When there's no one here by my side
Wishin' I could see all my friends
Wishin' I could just play pretend




Keep my head held high they said
But these voices say I'm better off dead

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of Pasteldrip's song "I'm Not Okay" delve into the struggles and inner turmoil that the artist is experiencing. The opening lines, "Feel my eyes sink back in ma' skull / No drug could play me a fool" suggest a sense of exhaustion and weariness. The artist feels overwhelmed by life and is possibly hinting at the idea that substances cannot provide an escape or solution.


The song continues with the artist expressing frustration about wasting time and feeling alone. They thought everything was fine, but something has now gotten on their mind, causing inner turmoil. The conflicting voices in their head represent a battle between societal expectations of staying strong and holding one's head high, contrasted with the voices that suggest they would be better off dead. This internal struggle is further highlighted by the reference to benzodiazepines (benzos) in their head, implying a desire for numbness or relief from the emotional pain they are experiencing.


The artist also reflects on the past and the loss of memory regarding events that occurred years ago. They express a longing for a sign or some form of hope, possibly indicating a desire for a positive change or a sense of purpose. The line "If I could save a life, it'd be nothing but to feel" suggests that they may be searching for a meaningful connection or a way to feel alive again.


Overall, the lyrics of "I'm Not Okay" address themes of exhaustion, isolation, and internal struggles with mental health. It offers a glimpse into the artist's emotional state and their longing for something more.


Line by Line Meaning

Feel my eyes sink back in ma' skull
I feel overwhelmed and exhausted, as if the weight of the world is weighing down on me.


No drug could play me a fool
I cannot be deceived or influenced by any substance, as I am aware of the illusion and its consequences.


I'm so tired of waistin' my time
I am exhausted from spending my time frivolously and without purpose.


When there's no one here by my side
I feel lonely and abandoned, yearning for someone to be with me and offer support.


Just when I thought everything's fine
Just when I believed that my life was finally going well and everything was in order.


Something's gotta get on my mind
Something is troubling me, preoccupying my thoughts and causing distress.


Keep my head held high they said
People advised me to remain strong and confident, despite my struggles.


But these voices say I'm better off dead
Nevertheless, the internal voices within me insist that I would be better off ending my life.


Benzos in my head
Thoughts of taking benzodiazepines or other substances to numb my mind and emotions.


I'm doin' fine, but not invincible
I may seem okay on the surface, but I am far from invincible and still vulnerable.


Got no recollection bout the things that happened years ago
I have no memory or clear understanding of past events that occurred years ago, creating a sense of detachment from my own history.


I could use a sign baby, hope it ain't impossible, if I could save a life
I long for a sign or indication that things can get better, hoping to have the ability to positively impact someone else's life.


It'd be nothing but to feel
The most significant thing for me would be to experience genuine emotions and connection.


No one can escape this hell hole
Everyone is trapped in this dreadful and oppressive situation, unable to find a way out.


Wishin' I could see all my friends
I yearn to be reunited with all my friends and experience the joy and support that their presence brings.


Wishin' I could just play pretend
I desire to escape the harsh realities of life and temporarily pretend that everything is perfect.




Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid
Written by: Jacob Murphree

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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