Paul Heaton formed The Housemartins in the early 1980s. The Housemartins released a number of singles and two studio albums, London 0 Hull 4 and The People Who Grinned Themselves to Death. Their most famous hit was an a-capella version of the Isley Brothers' Caravan of Love, which was a Christmas number one in the UK.
In 1988, Paul Heaton formed The Beautiful South from the ashes of The Housemartins. The Beautiful South released two top ten singles, Song for Whoever and You Keep It All In, which featured Irish singer Briana Corrigan on vocals. In 1989, the band released an album "Welcome to the Beautiful South" by which time Corrigan had joined the band as a full time member. The band's biggest success to date is the release of the single "A Little Time" in 1991. It reached number 1 on the charts. In 1993 the band released their third album, "0898 Beautiful South".
In 1994, Briana Corrigan left the band and a new female vocalist, Jacqui Abbott, was brought in. During the recording of the band's fourth album "Miaow", Heaton was increasingly irritated with the band and at one time told them to get their act together or he would leave. "Miaow" is some of Heaton's most depressing songwriting (only their fifth studio album, "Blue Is The Colour", is considered sadder). Heaton was going through a break-up with his girlfriend and other problems at the time. After the release of Miaow's third single, "Prettiest Eyes", the record company was worried about the band's sales, so they proposed a greatest hits release to save the band. Heaton hated the idea as he was trying to keep the band as far away from mainstream as possible, but nevertheless, "Carry on up the Charts" was released in December 1994 and it sold overwhelmingly, going platinum and becoming one of the biggest selling albums of all time in the UK.
The band returned to form a number one album, "Blue Is the Colour". Their sixth album, "Quench", also hit the top spot. In 2000, after the release of "Painting It Red", Jacqui Abbott left the band to care for her son. A second compilation album, "Solid Bronze", was released and two more studio albums with a new female vocalist, Alison Wheeler. The first, Gaze, became the first Beautiful South album to fail to reach the top 10, and the band were then dropped by Mercury Records.
The following year (2004), newly signed to Sony, they released the curiously named covers album Goldiggas, Headnodders and Pholk Songs, an eclectic album that featured the Beautiful South's unique take on a wide variety of tracks by the like of ELO, Blue Öyster Cult, John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John, S Club 7, and Rufus Wainwright. Again, despite considerable publicity and promotional TV appearances, the album failed to make the top 10.
2006 saw the release of yet another album of new material, "Superbi." Reviews were generally positive. "Superbi" has more of an alt-country sound (plenty of slide guitar, for example) than previous Beautiful South releases. The album maintains the band's trademark eccentricity, however, featuring a dobro on one song.
On the ITV documentary music series Faith & Music screened 29th October 2006, Paul talks openly and honestly about his atheism and his battle with alcoholism.
Heaton is the father of two daughters, although he has never married.
www.paulheatonmusic.co.uk
10 Lessons In Love
Paul Heaton Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
and they probably won't notice your weight (That's 1)
No one counts the acres in the field
when they're swinging on gate
Distracting their attention is achieved
with a worrying ease
They can't taste the fruit
The scar you conceal
the stretch marks covered up at all times
Won't ever surface if you shag him
and start talking star signs (That's 2)
There's a thousand sweeping statements that you can use
before he reaches the bra
And if he's close to unhooking the truth
whisper "Time at the bar" (That's 3)
If you brush up on History and Science
he'll be able to blag
The "She's too intelligent" or
"She's just a friend we don't shag" (That's 4)
Don't wave him goodbye
Don't say you'll see him around (5 - 6)
Knowing he'll say you were a pig
when he thought you were sound
And if all 10 lessons in love
weighed a stone a piece
You'd be bigger and more beautiful
and hiding men in every crease
Hooking men is easy
losing them is tougher by far
Cause if they're drunk enough to fuck you
then they wont be driving home in their car
So get him in a cab, make him pay
drag him into your flat (That's 7)
Keep him topped up with whatever
got you as far as that (That's 8)
And in the morning when he opens his eyes
let it all hang down (That's 9)
Then time how long it takes him to ask
for a taxi to town
Don't wave him goodbye
Don't say you'll see him around (5 - 6)
Knowing he'll say you were a pig
when he thought you were sound
And if all 10 lessons in love
weighed a stone a piece
You'd be bigger and more beautiful
and hiding men in every crease
One night stands
shouldn't fill themselves with shame
Maybe just a promise next time
to take a steadier aim
Why every guy denies
receiving 1st prize
Like its pumpkin or marrow at fayre
not a human with eyes
Don't wave him goodbye
Don't say you'll see him around (5 - 6)
Knowing he'll say you were a pig
when he thought you were sound
And if all 10 lessons in love
weighed a stone a piece
You'd be bigger and more beautiful
and hiding men in every crease
Trapped by the mob he'll confess
that he stayed the whole night
But only agreed
after putting up a hell of a fight
And if you leave him your e-mail address
it's a pretty safe bet (That's 10)
He'll be hiding his computer
and denying ever using the net
In "10 Lessons in Love," Paul Heaton paints a picture of a woman who is skilled in the art of seduction. The lyrics are a sort of a tongue-in-cheek guide on how to successfully seduce men. The opening lines suggest that if a woman keeps men busy talking, they are less likely to notice her weight. The next line talks about how people swinging on a gate do not count the acres in a field, implying that if a woman keeps a man's attention in other ways, he won't notice her flaws.
The song goes on to suggest various tactics a woman can use to distract a man and keep him interested. These include using sweeping statements, talking about history and science, and pretending to be too intelligent to be interested in sex. The song also suggests that women should not allow men to drive home drunk but should get them a cab, keep them topped up with whatever got them seduced in the first place, and let it all hang down in the morning before sending them on their way.
Overall, the song is a satirical take on seduction and relationships, highlighting some of the absurdities and unspoken rules of the dating game.
Line by Line Meaning
You Keep 'em busy talking
and they probably won't notice your weight (That's 1)
Distracting someone's attention from your appearance is relatively easy. They're unlikely to judge you harshly without scrutiny.
The scar you conceal
the stretch marks covered up at all times
Won't ever surface if you shag him
and start talking star signs (That's 2)
If you're self-conscious about something, you can avoid worrying about it by distracting the person you're with with a conversation about anything else.
There's a thousand sweeping statements that you can use
before he reaches the bra
And if he's close to unhooking the truth
whisper "Time at the bar" (That's 3)
If you want to avoid intimacy, you can distract someone with flattery or conversation and redirect attention away from sex until you're more comfortable.
If you brush up on History and Science
he'll be able to blag
The "She's too intelligent" or
"She's just a friend we don't shag" (That's 4)
If you're worried about being judged or shamed by someone you're with, you can impress them with your knowledge and intelligence to avoid being put down or dismissed.
Don't wave him goodbye
Don't say you'll see him around (5 - 6)
Knowing he'll say you were a pig
when he thought you were sound
If you're concerned about someone talking about you negatively after you've been with them, it's best to avoid prolonged goodbyes or any expectation of seeing them again.
And if all 10 lessons in love
weighed a stone a piece
You'd be bigger and more beautiful
and hiding men in every crease
If you internalize these tips and become adept at avoiding intimacy or negative judgment, you'll have the freedom to engage as much or as little as you like without fear of being judged.
So get him in a cab, make him pay
drag him into your flat (That's 7)
Keep him topped up with whatever
got you as far as that (That's 8)
If you're interested in engaging with someone sexually, it's important to take control of the situation and ensure that you're comfortable and confident. Offer drinks or make other small gestures to keep them at ease.
And in the morning when he opens his eyes
let it all hang down (That's 9)
Then time how long it takes him to ask
for a taxi to town
After a night together, it's important to feel comfortable in your own skin and not be self-conscious. If the person you're with is uncomfortable afterward, they may try to leave quickly or distance themselves.
One night stands
shouldn't fill themselves with shame
Maybe just a promise next time
to take a steadier aim
It's okay to engage with someone sexually and not feel shame or worry about what others might think. If you're interested in continuing to do so, be open about it and don't let societal norms or conventions hold you back.
Trapped by the mob he'll confess
that he stayed the whole night
But only agreed
after putting up a hell of a fight
Men are sometimes defensive or evasive about their sexual or romantic involvements with women because of societal norms and pressure to appear 'masculine' or in control.
And if you leave him your e-mail address
it's a pretty safe bet (That's 10)
He'll be hiding his computer
and denying ever using the net
In the age of technology, some men may be afraid of being caught in any romantic or sexual wrongdoing, and may take steps to hide their behavior or deny ever having engaged with someone online or through social media.
Contributed by Aria I. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
@dionysus101
One of the finest songs of recent times. Lyrics are wonderful...
@Archi-Bald
I love jacqui Abbots voice and Paul Heaton is just a National treasure
@crystalball6358
I love this group and the song!
@rockinrobo84
Still a great tune. I heard that after Jacqui left Dave Hemingway sung her parts during gigs until Alison joined. I would love to see a video of Paul and Dave doing this as a duet. I Imagine it would have been funny. I tried looking to see if there was performances of this on YouTube from around late 2000 or 2001 but couldn't find any.
@crochetandcrashhelmets3505
Love this ❤
@tyronepower3786
Fantastic Brings back great memories
@WillRobinson
4 years later, still broken as shit and hilarious with it
@slash7661
techno version starts at 2:02 ! 😂
@boraboris2008
😹
@andyrharris
Tyres from Spaced would love this part.