Where Is Pevan?
Pevan & Sarah Lyrics
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Dreaming bout how I'm gonna die here
This place has got me down, too many times
If there's a plan for me, the devil signed
I'm not safe, kinda like it anyway
I'm in chains, but I don't need em to stay
I'm having terrors having nightmares
Dreaming bout how I'm gonna die
Bittersweet, my enemies, got 6 degrees of separation now
I know that it's kind of sick, I'm loving it
They wanna see me buried underground
I'm insane, like, I need pain
Only feelin' high when I go down
It's gonna be the death of me, I'll never leave
Home is where the hell is
Maybe I'm overly attached too
This sinking feeling I amuse
Ha ha ha
I'm gonna bite the hand that feeds me
Oh what a way to die
I'm not safe, kinda like it anyway
I'm in chains, but I don't need em to stay
I'm having terrors having nightmares
Dreaming bout how I'm gonna die
Bittersweet, my enemies, got 6 degrees of separation now
I know that it's kind of sick, I'm loving it
They wanna see me buried underground
I'm insane, like, I need pain
Only feelin' high when I go down
It's gonna be the death of me, I'll never leave
Home is where the hell is
I'm insane like, I need pain
Kinda like I hate this fucking town
It's gonna be the death of me
I'll never leave
Home is where the hell is
In Pevan & Sarah's song "Where Is Pevan?", the lyrics paint a vivid picture of internal conflict and emotional turmoil. The opening lines introduce a sense of dread and helplessness, with the imagery of nightmares and terrors encapsulating a profound anxiety about mortality. The singer feels trapped in a suffocating environment that repeatedly brings them down, suggesting a cycle of despair that has robbed them of peace and hope. The lyric “If there’s a plan for me, the devil signed” implies a resignation to fate, as if the singer believes their struggles are beyond their control or perhaps even predetermined, leading to a contemplative mood about the nature of their existence and the inevitability of death. This juxtaposition of fear and acceptance creates a haunting atmosphere, as the singer navigates their feelings of entrapment and foreboding about their life’s trajectory.
As the song progresses, there is a deep exploration of relationships and one's perception of enemies. The phrase “bittersweet, my enemies, got 6 degrees of separation now” suggests a complicated social web where the singer finds interconnectedness with those who may wish them harm. This recognition provides a strange sense of satisfaction, hinting at a darker enjoyment in knowing that others are vying for their downfall. The lyrics reveal a conflicted state of mind, where the singer oscillates between feeling persecuted and delighting in their adversaries’ machinations. This encapsulation of betrayal and connection underscores a theme of alienation, pointing to the human tendency to find solace—even in the negativity surrounding them—during times of distress.
The chorus offers a contrasting sentiment, where the singer acknowledges their discomfort but simultaneously expresses a twisted sense of freedom within it: "I'm not safe, kinda like it anyway." This line highlights a paradoxical relationship with pain and confinement; despite being "in chains," the singer feels an unexpected liberation in recognizing their chains as self-imposed rather than mandatory. This acceptance could signify a turning point, where the acknowledgment of one's struggles leads to an unusual sense of agency. However, the recurring motif of death throughout the song suggests that while the singer grapples with their chains, they are also acutely aware that this acceptance of their circumstances might lead them down a path of self-destruction.
By the end of the song, the intensity of the singer's feelings surfaces through lines that emphasize a painful dependence on chaos: “I need pain” and “home is where the hell is.” This culminates in a realization that their environment—be it physical or emotional—is simultaneously a source of torment and a twisted sense of belonging. The phrase “I’ll never leave” reveals a profound struggle with escapism; even in the midst of suffering, there is an attachment to the very chaos that brings about such distress. Thus, the song unfolds not just as an exposition of fear and nightmares but as a complex narrative that navigates themes of identity, alienation, pain, and the paradoxical bonds that one may form with their darker experiences, reinforcing the idea that sometimes one’s greatest battles are fought within the confines of their own mind.
Line by Line Meaning
I'm having terrors having nightmares
I am experiencing intense fear and distress during my sleep.
Dreaming bout how I'm gonna die here
My dreams are filled with the anxiety of my own mortality in this place.
This place has got me down, too many times
I've been emotionally and mentally drained by my surroundings repeatedly.
If there's a plan for me, the devil signed
If there is a fate meant for me, it feels sinister or cruel, like it was orchestrated by evil.
I'm not safe, kinda like it anyway
I recognize that I'm in danger, yet there is a strange comfort in that unpredictability.
I'm in chains, but I don't need em to stay
I feel trapped by my circumstances, yet I choose to remain despite the limitations.
I'm having terrors having nightmares
Once again, I'm engulfed in fear and troubled sleep.
Dreaming bout how I'm gonna die
The recurring nightmare of facing my own demise haunts me.
Bittersweet, my enemies, got 6 degrees of separation now
My relationships with those who oppose me are complex and distant yet interconnected.
I know that it's kind of sick, I'm loving it
I acknowledge the twisted nature of my emotions, yet I find pleasure in them.
They wanna see me buried underground
My adversaries wish for my downfall and ultimate demise.
I'm insane, like, I need pain
I feel mentally unstable and have a compulsive attraction to suffering.
Only feelin' high when I go down
The only moments I experience euphoria are when I embrace the lows in my life.
It's gonna be the death of me, I'll never leave
This dangerous pattern will lead to my undoing, yet I'm unwilling to escape it.
Home is where the hell is
The place I consider home is actually filled with torment and suffering.
Maybe I'm overly attached too
I might have an unhealthy dependency on the negativity surrounding me.
This sinking feeling I amuse
I entertain the dark feelings of despair that weigh me down.
Ha ha ha
This laughter may be sarcastic, reflecting the absurdity of my situation.
I'm gonna bite the hand that feeds me
I plan to rebel against those who support me, despite their kindness.
Oh what a way to die
What a tragic yet fitting end it would be to turn against my benefactors.
I'm not safe, kinda like it anyway
Acknowledging my vulnerability, yet I strangely find comfort in the chaos.
I'm in chains, but I don't need em to stay
Feeling bound by my situation, yet choosing to endure it without necessity.
I'm having terrors having nightmares
Experiencing the overwhelming dread that disturbs my sleep once more.
Dreaming bout how I'm gonna die
Again plagued by thoughts of my mortality in my dreams.
Bittersweet, my enemies, got 6 degrees of separation now
My foes are now distanced yet intricately linked to my life.
I know that it's kind of sick, I'm loving it
I'm aware of the morbid nature of my feelings, but there's a thrill in it.
They wanna see me buried underground
There are those who hope for my failure and demise.
I'm insane, like, I need pain
Feeling mentally troubled, I find myself drawn to pain.
Only feelin' high when I go down
The only time I feel a rush is when I embrace my lows.
It's gonna be the death of me, I'll never leave
This cycle is destined to destroy me, yet I can't bear to walk away.
Home is where the hell is
The place I call home feels like a source of endless suffering.
I'm insane like, I need pain
I feel mentally unbalanced and have an insatiable need for suffering.
Kinda like I hate this fucking town
I harbor a deep resentment towards my surroundings.
It's gonna be the death of me
This situation or town will ultimately lead to my destruction.
I'll never leave
Despite the toxicity, I feel trapped in this place.
Home is where the hell is
The environment I am in is filled with torment, marking it as my 'home.'
Lyrics © WORDS & MUSIC A DIV OF BIG DEAL MUSIC LLC
Written by: Cyrus Villanueva, Sarah Bodle, Sophie Curtis
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind