Forgive
Proof feat. 50 cent Lyrics

Barely raised by my dysfunctional fam
I grew up in a dysfunctional family and had a difficult childhood

Here I stand as a dysfunctional man
As a result of my difficult childhood, I am now a dysfunctional adult

Quick-tempered, short-fused, and pissed at God
I have a short temper and am angry at God for the challenges I have faced

Demons pullin' at my soul 'til it's ripped apart
I feel like I am being pulled in different directions and am struggling to find peace within myself

Secret's out momma that fire I started it
I am confessing that I caused a fire that I previously kept a secret

Fuck the fireman logic of the closet by the wire shit
I don't care about the consequences of my actions and reject any notion of keeping things a secret

What's positive about a father that bust nuts then wussed up
I see nothing positive about a father who is absent and doesn't take responsibility for his children

And a momma that don't show her son enough love
I feel like my mother didn't show me enough love and support growing up

Shit, that's why I run from my first son
I am avoiding my responsibility as a father to my first child

And force these chicken head bitches to get abortions
I am pressuring women I have relationships with to get abortions so that I can avoid being a father again

I'm married to game, my mistress is fame
I am fully committed to the entertainment industry and prioritize fame over other aspects of my life

My girl Paq the closest, she know I ain't gon' change
My girlfriend knows me well and accepts that I won't change

Go insane in a world evil as ours
The world we live in is full of evil and it can drive a person to madness

I done shot at houses, people and cars
I have engaged in violent and destructive behavior

The deeper the scars, the worst is the history
The more scars I have, the more difficult my past has been

God you ain't gotta forgive me, just don't forget me, you hear me?
I am asking for God's acknowledgement and remembrance, even if he cannot forgive me

Can't seem to get away from them courtin' fees
I am struggling with financial responsibilities, such as court fees

Embroidery, on my hood across my heart disorderly
I wear clothing decorated with symbols that may not represent me positively

Breakin' in houses of people who ain't got more than me
I have engaged in criminal activities such as breaking into homes of people who are not much better off than I am

Accordingly, I move in error
I often make mistakes and poor decisions

Gotta face the fact though I can't fool this mirror
I am realizing that I must confront my own flaws and can't pretend to be someone I'm not

Neglected my daughter and tryin' to blame on how I was brought up
I have neglected my responsibilities as a father to my daughter and am attempting to make excuses for my behavior

Like I'm a product of this environment, why ain't I shot up?
I see the negative aspects of my environment as a factor in my behavior and am questioning why I haven't turned out worse

Got up today like, "Why you let me breathe again?"
I am questioning why I have been given another chance at life

And with each breath I feel death is creepin' in
I am afraid of death and feel like it is approaching

Thinkin' sinners are winners and I'ma finish last
I believe that those who engage in sinful behavior are ultimately successful and I am destined to fail

My pen and pad record my life as each minute pass
I use writing as a way to document my life

Passin minutes, I shook sin and shook drugs
I am trying to distance myself from sinful behavior and drug use

I did right by you but still you took Bugz
I did my best to live a good life but someone close to me still died

Then caught me in adultery, fought me
I was caught cheating on my partner and there were consequences

For not knowin' through the dark streets you walked me, talked to me
I am acknowledging that God has been there for me, even when I didn't realize it

It's the risk that's a rush so rush my wrists in the cuffs
I feel like the thrill of taking risks is worth the potential consequences

It's like a fight for yo' attention and love
I feel like I am competing for attention and love from others

Speakin' of Bugz, give me a hint from above
I am asking for guidance from God for someone who has died

If he not you know I wanna be sent when I'm done
If my friend is not with God, I hope to be with him in the afterlife

Kid outta wedlock so my lady's frontin'
I have a child who was born outside of marriage and it is causing issues in my relationship

A positive anything is better than a negative nothin'
I believe that even a small positive thing is better than nothing positive at all

Just because the reverend listen, don't mean he care
Just because someone listens to my problems doesn't mean they truly care about me

Pops on crack with a sufferin' past
My father had a history of drug addiction and had a difficult life

I dream in black and white, the world color me bad
I have negative views about the world and struggle with optimism

Other than sad, painful and stress
My life is characterized by sadness, pain and stress

Life is good with the webs that, tangle with death
My life is often filled with danger and risk

Control the border, control the school
I am advocating for stricter border control and suggesting that it will also improve education

I have sinned amongst men and my soul is yours, yours
I am acknowledging my sins and asking God for forgiveness