Dear Coach's Corner
Propagandhi Lyrics

Dear, Ron MacLean
The start of the letter addressed to the Host of Hockey Night in Canada's Coach's Corner segment

Dear, Coach's Corner
The letter is also addressed to the segment itself

I'm writing in order
The purpose of the letter being written

For someone to explain
Asking for an explanation to be given

To my niece, the distinction
The intended recipient of the explanation

Between these mandatory pre-game group rites of submission
The specific activity being questioned

And the rallies at Nuremburg
A comparison being drawn between the activity and a well-known historical event

Specifically the function
The purpose being served

The ritual serves in conjunction
The additional function of the activity

With what everybody knows
A commonly understood fact

Is in the end a kid's game
The actual nature of the activity itself

I'm just appealing to your sense of fair play
A plea for fairness and honesty in response to the question being asked

When I say
Introducing an explanation for the question posed

She's puzzled by
An explanation of the questioner's situation

This incessant pressure
The problem being faced

For her to not defy
The requirement being made

Collective will
The authority behind the requirement

Yellow-ribboned lapels
A specific aspect of the requirement

As the soldiers inexplicably rappel
Further explanation of the aspect

Down from the arena rafters
Location and source of the activity

If not so insane
A commentary on the absurdity of the activity

Would be grounds for screaming laughter
An expression of the ridiculousness of the activity

Dear, Ron MacLean
Reintroduction of the host being addressed

I wouldn't bother with these questions
Acknowledgement of the seriousness of the questioning

If I didn't sense some spiritual connection
A personal admission of investment in the activity

We may not be the same
A statement of differences

But it's not like we're from different planets
A recognition of shared experiences

we both love this game so much
A shared passion for the activity

we can hardly fucking stand it
The intensity of the passion

Alberta-born, prairie-raised
A personal background for the writer

Ain't a sheet of ice north of Fargo I ain't played
A hyperbolic statement about the breadth of personal experience

From Penhold to the Gatineau
More locations of personal experience

Every fond memory of childhood that I know
The personal significance of the activity

Is somehow connected
A link being made

To the culture of this game, I can't just let it go
The passion and attachment being felt for the activity

I guess it comes down to
The introspective moment when personal opinion is being shaped

What kind of world you want
The consideration of a life philosophy

To live in
The general concept being considered

If diversity is disagreement
An example being provided

Disagreement is treason
The consequences of that example

Well, don't be surprised if we find ourselves reaping
A warning of possible outcomes

A strange and bitter fruit
The negative outcome being warned against

That sad old man beside you
An individual who may contribute to that outcome

Keeps feeding to young minds as virtue
The negative influence being exerted

It takes a village to raise a child
A well-known concept being introduced

A flag to raze the children
A disturbing call to action

Til they're nothing more than ballast for fulfilling
The purpose of that call to action

A madman's dream
The unattainable nature of that purpose

Of a paradise
The ideal being sought

Complexity reduced to black and white
A dissatisfaction with the complexity of life

How do I
Returning to the personal struggle of the author

Protect her from
This specific question being asked by the author