The Stenographer
Relient K Lyrics

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I got in a fight with the stenographer
Afterwards she read me like a book.
I had tried to get along with her
But my temperament was quickly overlooked.

On the weekends we can
Sneak into this courtroom
And you'll offer me some sort of bargain plea.

Yeah, Smith and Weston Jr. was a son of a gun
He pressed his nose up to my head.
Yeah, I was sweatin' bullets but I dodged the one
That was not as much sweat as was lead.

Oh, I still love you!
Oh, I still love you
Although I know that you want me dead.
And when I turn my other cheek
I will beg and I'll plead
That this time you might just kiss it instead.

Cause this is my story
And like the glue on the binding,
I'm sticking to it.
If you wanna implore me
To change my tune,
Well I just won't do it.

Cause this is my story
And like the glue on the binding,
I'm sticking to it.
If you wanna implore me

To change my tune,
Well I just won't do it.

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of Relient K's song "The Stenographer" tell the story of a fight between the singer and the stenographer, with whom he had tried to get along. The stenographer reads him like a book, indicating that she has a deep understanding of his character and temperament, and that their differences might have been more apparent to her than to him. The singer continues to speak about the stenographer in the past tense, indicating that the fight may have ended their relationship.

The singer offers a glimpse into their past relationship, mentioning that they would sneak into a courtroom on weekends and make some sort of bargain plea. The line "Smith and Weston Jr. was a son of a gun, he pressed his nose up to my head" suggests that the singer was in some danger due to their shady dealings. However, he still loves the stenographer, despite knowing that she may want him dead. He even begs her to kiss his other cheek, indicating an unwillingness to give up on their relationship.

Line by Line Meaning

I got in a fight with the stenographer
I had a disagreement with the court reporter

Afterwards she read me like a book.
She easily figured me out after the argument.

I had tried to get along with her
I attempted to have a good working relationship with her.

But my temperament was quickly overlooked.
My behavior wasn't taken into consideration.

On the weekends we can
During our free time we have the opportunity to

Sneak into this courtroom
Enter the courtroom secretly

And you'll offer me some sort of bargain plea.
You'll propose a deal to me.

Yeah, Smith and Weston Jr. was a son of a gun
Smith and Weston Jr. was a real troublemaker.

He pressed his nose up to my head.
He threatened me directly.

Yeah, I was sweatin' bullets but I dodged the one
I was terrified but I avoided harm.

That was not as much sweat as was lead.
The fear was as heavy as a bullet.