unopened letter
September Stories Lyrics

And dear love
The author addresses their lover and begins their letter.

This is the fifth time that I've written you today
The author emphasizes how much they've been thinking about their lover and how they can't stop writing to them.

Or maybe the sixth, after three they tend to all start to blend together
The author acknowledges that they have lost track of how many letters they've written to their lover as they all seem to blend together in their mind.

Regardless of the number, the meaning still remains
The author makes it clear that the meaning behind all of their letters is still the same.

The ink that I've split onto this sheet is stained with the guilt you carried
The author blames their lover for the guilt that they feel and how it has affected the content of their letters.

From the first week of knowing you
The author implies that their guilt started from the very beginning of their relationship with their lover.

Even those first few words that you uttered out of that entrancing mouth of yours
The author remembers how they were charmed by their lover's words from the beginning.

I took too far to heart
The author admits that they were too invested in their lover's words and that it was a mistake.

But the realization that they had steadily become rotten was far more than withstandable
The author came to the realization that their lover's words were not genuine and that they were bad for them.

No... Convincing myself that what I took for real was just a twisted illusion
The author tries to convince themselves that what they thought was real was just a figment of their imagination.

And that your words could be held with some sense of meaning…
The author tries to hold onto the idea that their lover's words still have some meaning, even though they know they don't.

Was far easier to withstand
The author found it easier to delude themselves into thinking that their lover's words had meaning, instead of facing the truth.

You see, I just wanted to act like I had a perfect life, like we were perfect, like nothing else in the world could be anymore perfect
The author admits to putting on a facade of a perfect life with their lover, despite knowing that it wasn't real.

But I guess I'll never get that
The author accepts that their perfect life with their lover was never going to happen.

And maybe it was my illusion of perfection
The author recognizes that their idea of a perfect life with their lover was just an illusion.

Or how that word was engraved in my brain every time you'd look at me with that relentless stare
The author recalls how their lover's intense gaze made them feel like they were in love.

That haunting, creeping stare that I so loathed
The author now loathes their lover's once alluring gaze.

But I didn't loathe it enough to not let it ensnare me
The author acknowledges that they were still attracted to their lover despite knowing that they were bad for them.

Though I knew of the branches' thorns
The author knew that being with their lover would have painful consequences.

I let it wrap itself around me
The author allowed their lover's influence to take over them.

Drawing blood with every inch that it covered
The author suffered from pain as they let their lover dominate their life.

With every limb that it captured and claimed its own
The author's lover had complete control over them.

I let it creep and crawl its way around me
The author allowed their lover to consume them.

Until I had nothing left to call my own
The author lost their individuality as they let their lover take over.

Which made the cutting of the branches that much harder
The author found it difficult to break free from their lover's grip.

Pieces of me trapped between the thorns
The author experienced pain and trauma as they tried to disentangle themselves from their lover's dominance.

Tearing apart and leaving the hollow being that I like to call a body
The author felt lost and empty after finally breaking free from their lover.

Cause that's all that was left
The author was left with nothing after their relationship with their lover ended.

It's like the lights were on and the water was running
The author was going through the motions of life, but they were not truly living it.

But I couldn't have been any further gone
The author was emotionally and mentally disconnected from their life.

Scared, scraped, and just remnants of what I once was
The author was left feeling vulnerable and broken.

Left to rot and wither as the branches claimed what they thought rightfully there's
The author's lover took advantage of them and left them feeling used and unwanted.

Moving on to the next with no less sympathy than the last
The author's lover was quick to move on to another relationship, showing no remorse for the pain they caused.

For months I tried to hate, tried to resent, tried to forget
The author tried different methods to cope with the pain of their failed relationship.

But I end up laughing instead
The author found that, instead of feeling angry or sad, they now feel a sense of humor and acceptance towards their past.

I know that you're the last person I should want to see, but it's just not that way to me
The author recognizes that their lover is not someone they should be with, but they still have feelings for them.

Because every time I look at the scars you left covering the undersides of my arms
The author has physical reminders of the pain their lover caused, but they still feel a emotional connection to them.

I only see the beauty that once was
The author still sees the good times they shared with their lover.

I only see the times we enjoyed, and not the times that we regret
The author chooses to remember the happy moments with their lover, instead of dwelling on the negative ones.

The times you left me star struck and teary eyed and not broken and alone
The author remembers the moments when their lover made them feel loved and happy, but they ignore the times when they felt lonely and hurt.

Please God I just wish you had poured meaning into the word we call 'love'
The author wishes that their lover had taken their relationship more seriously and had not used the word 'love' so casually.

Made it more than a word, at least that's how it was to me
The author believed that 'love' meant something more significant and powerful than what their lover made it out to be.

Even after I've picked out every last thorn that's dug itself neck deep into my skin
The author has taken the time to recover from their failed relationship, but they still carry emotional scars.

I can't toss them into the flames like every photo from when I once knew you
The author is not ready to completely let go of their past relationship and is still holding onto physical reminders of their lover.

Because the pain it reminds me
The author still experiences emotional pain from their failed relationship, and they are not ready to let go of that pain yet.

I wish I'd known what you had wanted
The author admits that they were not aware of their lover's true intentions and desires.

Wanted all along
The author recognizes that their lover had specific wants and needs that they were not aware of.

Thought you wanted me, my heart on my sleeve
The author believed that their lover wanted them to be completely open and vulnerable.

I had thought wrong
The author recognizes that their beliefs were incorrect and that their lover had different wants and needs than they thought.

I Wish I knew.
The author wishes that they were aware of their lover's true intentions and desires from the beginning of their relationship.