Gag Order
Shadowside Lyrics


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Once more I open up the door
A group of people stare
I try to ignore
Overcome by fear

I wear the mask and try to be
Assured, witty and sweet
I choke on my thoughts
All my lines are blocked

A simple answer would suffice
(I hear them whispering)
My mind is rushing, I'm in silence

The storm calls me back home
Nothing to feign
I won't personify again

The storm calls me back home
Nothing to feign
I won't personify again

I look up to the pitch-black sky
Sounds of rain loud outside
Alone I give out
I let myself down

I sing to quieten this shriek
Of nostalgy in me
Wary in my words
All thinking is blurred

I can't express what's in my mind
(Why did I say nothing...?)
No one knows what I hide inside

The storm calls me back home
Nothing to feign
I won't personify again

The storm calls me back home
Nothing to feign
I won't personify again

The storm calls me back home
Nothing to feign
I won't personify again

The storm calls me back home




Nothing to feign
I won't personify again

Overall Meaning

The lyrics to Shadowside's song "Gag Order" describe the feeling of being overwhelmed and silenced by fear and anxiety. The singer opens the door to a group of people who stare at them, causing them to feel overcome by fear. They try to put on a mask of confidence and wit, but their thoughts become blocked and they can't think of anything to say. The singer feels trapped, wishing for a simple answer but unable to express themselves. Instead, they turn to the storm, a metaphor for their inner turmoil, which "calls them back home." They vow not to "personify" again, or try to be someone they're not to please others.


The lyrics convey the pain of feeling trapped and silenced by fear and anxiety. The singer's struggle is relatable to anyone who has experienced social anxiety or felt pressure to fit in. The storm represents a powerful force that calls the singer back to their true self, a reminder that they don't have to pretend to be someone they're not to be accepted. The repeated phrase "nothing to feign, I won't personify again" is a mantra of self-acceptance and self-love, and a reminder not to let fear and anxiety dictate one's behavior.


Line by Line Meaning

Once more I open up the door
I am putting myself out there again


A group of people stare
But people are watching


I try to ignore
I try not to let them affect me


Overcome by fear
But the fear takes over


I wear the mask and try to be
So I put on a facade


Assured, witty and sweet
Projecting confidence and humor


I choke on my thoughts
But inside my mind is racing


All my lines are blocked
And I can't speak or communicate effectively


A simple answer would suffice
I just need to say something


(I hear them whispering)
But I hear them talking behind my back


My mind is rushing, I'm in silence
And it's making it hard for me to think and speak


The storm calls me back home
So I retreat inwardly, where I am safe


Nothing to feign
I am tired of pretending


I won't personify again
I won't put on a false persona anymore


I look up to the pitch-black sky
I am alone and it is dark


Sounds of rain loud outside
The sound of rain is all I can hear


Alone I give out
I succumb to my doubts and fears


I let myself down
And I disappoint myself


I sing to quieten this shriek
So I sing to try to calm myself


Of nostalgy in me
Of the nostalgia and longing inside of me


Wary in my words
But I am still hesitant to speak


All thinking is blurred
And my thoughts are still jumbled and unclear


I can't express what's in my mind
I still can't articulate my feelings


(Why did I say nothing...?)
And I regret keeping silent


No one knows what I hide inside
Because no one can see the true me


The storm calls me back home
So again, I retreat inwardly


Nothing to feign
I won't fake it anymore


I won't personify again
I will be true to myself from now on




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