There is more than one artist under this name:

1. Spray is a 21st ce… Read Full Bio ↴There is more than one artist under this name:

1. Spray is a 21st century synthpop duo from England, starring Jenny McLaren and Ricardo Autobahn. Following the demise of their previous band, the Cuban Boys (famous for their Hamster Dance record and John Peel sessions), McLaren and Autobahn released the album Living In Neon on Ninthwave Records in the USA, followed by the single I Am Gothic in 2003. A new album, Children of a Laser God, was released in the fall of 2006.
Amongst other projects, Spray have been partially responsible for Glen Campbell's 2002 return to the top of the charts with the Rhinestone Cowboy remake, and the top 40 kids band the Barndance Boys. McLaren has a successful sideline in vocalising club/dance records, and Autobahn in soundtracks and commercials. The band has also had their single I Am Gothic appear in the Xbox game Dance Dance Revolution Ultramix 3.
In 2006, Autobahn co-wrote and produced the UK's Eurovision entry, Teenage Life, with his long-term collaborator Daz Sampson.

2. Spray is a thrash/punk hardcore band from Byron Bay.

3. Spray is a punk/rock band from Slovakia.
4. Spray is your neighborhood's punk band from İzmir, Turkey.

I Am Gothic
Spray Lyrics

Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴

Step inside, candle lights my despairing gloom
I'm just no brooding teen - I'm considered abstruse
It's so sparse being dark, can't you feel my pain?
People are all the same. They isolate my ways

Catch the ghost train to the centre of my heart
(then the dark will rise again)
I am potent, I'm profound

(then the clouds will part)

I am gothic
I am pale
I am scary
I'm insane
I'm a loner
I am cold
I feel special when people don't phone

I am gothic
I am pale
I am scary
I'm insane
I'm a loner

I am cold
I feel special when people don't phone

Overall Meaning

The lyrics to Spray's song "I Am Gothic" depict the feelings of a person who identifies as gothic - a subculture that is often associated with being dark, mysterious, and introspective. The singer describes themselves as someone who is not simply a brooding teenager, but rather, someone who is abstruse and misunderstood. They express their struggle with feeling alone and isolated, as they believe that people do not understand or accept their ways. The use of a candle to light their "despairing gloom" paints a picture of a gloomy atmosphere that typifies the gothic subculture.

The chorus of the song further emphasizes the singer's feelings of being an outcast, by repeating the phrase "I am gothic" several times. The singer's pale, scary, and insane qualities are highlighted, further contributing to their perceived 'otherness'. They describe feeling special when people don't phone, suggesting a desire for solitude and introspection.

The bridge of the song incorporates an image of a ghost train journeying to the center of the singer's heart, and the lifting of clouds, suggesting a hope for clarity and understanding. Overall, the lyrics of the song paint a picture of a complex individual who is struggling with feeling isolated and different from others.

Line by Line Meaning

Step inside, candle lights my despairing gloom
Entering my space, the only source of light is a flickering candle in my dim room filled with hopelessness.

I'm just no brooding teen - I'm considered abstruse
I'm not just a moody adolescent, but rather seen as enigmatic and difficult to understand.

It's so sparse being dark, can't you feel my pain?
Living in darkness is lonely and isolating. Can't you empathize with my suffering?

People are all the same. They isolate my ways
I'm judged and excluded by others for being different and not conforming to societal norms.

Catch the ghost train to the centre of my heart (then the dark will rise again)
Take a journey inside my mind to truly understand me, and the darkness within me will come to light once more.

I am potent, I'm profound (then the clouds will part)
I have a powerful and deep presence, and when understood, clarity will come like clearing skies after a storm.

I am gothic
I embrace a culture and aesthetic of darkness, mourning and mystery.

I am pale
My complexion is pallid, reflecting my love for the macabre rather than a healthy lifestyle.

I am scary
My appearance and demeanor can be frightening to those who are easily unsettled or refuse to understand me.

I'm insane
I may appear unstable or unbalanced due to my unconventional beliefs and lifestyle.

I'm a loner
I prefer solitude to the company of others as they often don't understand me and my interests.

I am cold
I have a certain aloofness and distance due to my darker nature, preferring to keep others at arm's length.

I feel special when people don't phone
Rather than feeling isolated and abandoned, I feel empowered and unique when left to myself.

Contributed by Camilla A. Suggest a correction in the comments below.

To comment on or correct specific content, highlight it

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Comments from YouTube:

The Last Day Breathing In Eternal Snow

3y↑7

I've been listening to this song since it was first posted. I miss these days, I want to cry. I'm a black goth and metalhead guy. The only part of the song I can't sing is the pale part because..well.. I have a brown skin tone, but the song in general is amazing. I was like 15 when I found this song, I will be 26, March 22, 2021.

goth dragonqueen

45w

its not about the color of your skin. yes many of us would love to be paler but its not in the genetics! gothdragonqueen2 Goth streamer for life!😈😈😈😈

The Last Day Breathing In Eternal Snow

45w

@goth dragonqueen It's funny how I was listening to this song again after a couple of years again and then I see this comment. This was one of my first introductions to darker music besides Goth rock, Darkwave and Metal Music.

chocolate12345123

14y

I'm not much of a goth, but I think this song represents us pretty well.

FrightfulAccountant

15y↑1

In certain ways yes. Spray did a very great job on this song. They knew that nowadays, most people listening synthpop, are actualy gothic. And they made a kind of satiric statement of that. I realy like that sort of humor. ^^ If youngsters should find inspiration or even a message in this song, then I might become rather concerned of the level of the future of the scene. :p This song is just a very good joke and nothing more than that... :P

CrazyHappy08

15y

Loved it. :)

Lady Blackrose

12y

I am gothic and this just made me laugh so bad!! It's funny and the beat is to awesome to hate

FrightfulAccountant

15y

'I feel special when people don't phone' is the repeating phrase in this song. Having a broken ancient pone, is quite a way of expressing that. Very Mallgoth... XD

DarkArnold AKA Sausagekrieg

2y↑1

2022 still pop this track on

Eryk Steele

13y

I am gothic and i like this song! :-|

Иванна

11y↑1

I'm a goth and I find this song very amusing.

smavey

15y

this song is my theme song

MisterAleksandr

13y↑3

I am amused by the 'goths' getting insulted by this song. You really do need to cheer up if you think this song is actually trying to offend you. You live how you do because it's what you want, people don't always like it, deal with it. The people throwing abuse at the 'goth' subculture should really take a look at themselves and think "Huh i'm part of a subculture too, people probably hate me just as much as I hate goths" and maybe we can all be nicer to each other :3

parris bouyea DIY COSPLAYER

MisterAleksandr coming from someone gothic personality, myself I actually enjoy the song 🤷🏻‍♂️

FrightfulAccountant

15y

Yeah Batcave looks good ^^ It's all mentionedto be humouristic. Spray mended that way in the song and I just followed suit with the video. Disclaimers? Yes, that is the modern way to tell people things. But I am not a big fan of such system. People, and defently goths, should be intelligent enough to understand the meaning of videos like this. ;)

Automaton539

15y

man i love this, where can i get it?

Mrmsses

13y

I don't find myself insulted by this song, as it's not that much insulting. True, we don't think of ourselves exactly as the song goes, but we do realize it's how other people see us. Not sure how other goths react, but I like being judged like this, as S3xPyst0l said. It simply shows the stupidity of common peasants. Some of them who don't judge me this way, I realize they have a higher IQ than the sea level and in a way, they earn my respect. I am offended by the twilight poster though. >.<

KeyCoward

12y

in my town, a 12 year old goth girl killed her family to be with her 21 year old boyfriend before I moved there. I had always been attracted to gothica and punk but I lived in a small town so i couldnt dress the way I wanted to. When I came to this town, no goths were here. only me. I single handedly brought the goth fashion to my school by singing this song in drama. I'm proud to be a gothica fan

TahreyUK

11y↑2

I don't think it's an official video, so the "stars" of it could be anyone. Probably just randoms videoed around Whitby. As for the music, it's Spray, a couple ex members of the Cuban Boys collective, and a rather entertaining pair of darkly humorous electropop technicians at that.

S3xPyst0l

14y

it's fun going to school with gothic make-up and people just look at you like you're the devil. peoples' judgments are so shallow. (x

TheNpcsim

13y

This is my song !

Art CG

15y

Like I said, I'm not offended by it, it's not like it was a total payout, but I still think that a tiny disclaimer on your info part would sway anyone that did get a little upset by it. The problem is that you can't predict how people are going to react, or expect people to act a certain way. But it's just a suggestion, ignore it if you will.

Art CG

15y

Love the outfits at 2.24 I'm a goth, no seriously, I didn't take too much offense to this as I have a life. But I can see that this might upset some people. Oh well, I'm sure it's all in good taste. But, yes, it's incredibly generalized. But maybe a disclaimer on your info part would be nice. Cheers!

FrightfulAccountant

15y

Well, this isn't a gothic song (spray is an synthpop band), thus by this it is irrelevant if the content of the band is gothic or not. ;) The song is ment to be a parody on the 'gothic' topic. And since MM represents the ultimate 'gothic image cliche'... ;)

Caitlin Bilancia

14y

Twilight is more pointing towards the Gap wearing preps. Goths aren't into sparkly vampires. Preps and barbies like "sparkly" things.

becky

13y

im i the only girl thats hyper and cheerful who finds gothic boys hot ? XD

boris 138

Tongue in cheek. Just like type o negative 😉😁

mikedashg

15y

Where did you get the footage for this video?

Siyyaha Crawford

I'm going to summon goths all over New York City !!!!!!!!!!!

JJ T

14y

This. This makes me giggle.

FrightfulAccountant

15y↑1

the clip has a rather 'mall goth' image. Twilight seemed perfect for it. ;)

chloweful

15y

cool I'm pale but I don't think that pale lol

FrightfulAccountant

15y

Techniqly spoken, marilyn manson isn't goth either. It's a parody. 30 years of the gothicimage, all in one video. ;)

Elluna Hellen

14y

Shit, now I don't hear I am gay anymore >.< it was fun.

BwooHuraca

10y↑3

This song amuses me, same with the comments that seem to take these lyrics seriously.

Quinn

13y

wow not only does this song insult my style, it also insults my religion! but whatev I really don't care. I've got to say, the song is kinda cool (not the lyrics though)

David from england

I'd rather be dead than be a goth

Lee Boyd

15y

And I the only one weirded out by the random telephone...?

FrightfulAccountant

15y

To be honest I actually don't really care what people think about my videos. :P I make custom videos for bands like The Sisters Of Mercy, Suicide Commando and Blutengel as well. Guess it's quite obvious of what sort of music I am fan off. :P

S3xPyst0l

15y

oh i see what you mean, cuz i see Twilight in every Hot Topic and book store. ._. makes sense (x

FrightfulAccountant

15y

Most of it random searched and ripped from youtube. Gothic teen girls & Emo Fashion - sexy teen Punk babes Personal Jesus - Marilyn Manson reportage sur la culture gothique The Gothics 1987 BATCAVE 2008 ... ;)

RESIFan2

14y

@PurpleStain6 i know right i think we should all get speakers fpr our ipods/mp3's and walk now playing this singing along to prove them wrong lol

Elluna Hellen

13y

When I first heard this I thought the lyrics were: "I am gothic, I am gay" xD

Adrienne Bloodrose

13y

@animallover2222 I agree with you but this song is really not pointing out how gothic ppl are. I am gothic but this song is trying to point out from a boy to someone who likes them like they're saying,"Everyone is scared of me how come u aren't?" and they r trying to scare that person.... kk?

THE BOMBASSTIC ASSTEROID

so ive been reading sum occult boox (like twilite)

Kaze No Yoko

11y↑1

also this happens all the time in music, look at the weird al song "amish paradise" a parody making fun of the amish, and I'm sure there are more out there for emo, gays, lesbians (O believe it's called all the things you said?), etc. it's our media these days, we make fun of things, and yes its bad.

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@gorknox And since when should a name like "Gorknox" count as original? It sounds like it comes straight out of WOW. XD

FrightfulAccountant

13y

@animallover2222 I would interpretend this song as a joke on the 'joke' rather then a real judgment. Most of the people buying Spray records are into New Wave/Futerpop, thus offending will probably not their point. ;)

DrTran06

13y↑1

goth girls are hot

Ravena Black

9y↑8

2:07 twilight??? what the hell???

jh jyh

14y

much agreed

GaiSensei Neemo

0:33 Chris Pohl🖤🖤🖤🖤

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@gorknox You might be surprised, but for a short period of time I have worked with DJ Malkavian -yeah thé Malkavian- organising local goth parties. I know he has the excact same opinion as you have. ;) I take it a bit more relaxed. We want to be ourself, but we want to have fun as well. Being an übergoth realy isn't a purpose to me. Nor taking myself serious. I mean... We are dudes wearing trench coats en combatboots, when it's 35°C in the burning sun. How serious you can take that? :p

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@FreezeCrackerFun Indeed, you are right about gorknox. ;) And ofcourse: someone with a playlist full of Hip Hop & Drum'n'bass, but still labeling himself as 'a true goth' should be the very last person to accuse others from being posers. :p That would be like Hitler acusing Roosevelt for being a rascist :p

Maxstar404

6y↑2

Who else is here from Ultramix 3 from the original XBOX?

LydiaMinx

7y↑1

So sad to see that emos took over the world, goths just got thrown under the bus

Alec Pitt

13y

@Chaochao16 hm, what religion does it insult? Just wondering. And agreed about the lyrics.. not exactly my favorite lyrics, but the music is awesome.

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@gorknox I think more than me, you where the one with a problem my friend. ;) Some of my friends like Heavy Metal, some like emocore and some even like hiphop or r&b. I don't care, I like them the way they are. If I would had act different, I wouldn't had been one bit better then all those dumbass shouting unnice stuff at me. Is it so hard to live in harmony with each other? ;)

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@Reemlie Part i sampeled out of an old batcave documentary, folowed by scenes shot at a new york gothclub. Both should be still on youtube i guess, but i can't find my original files back...

Jinx

Any Christians like me here?

Plot twist: I'm gothic too! 😜

Cha Fox

Heck yeah!
There's some really good Christian Goth bands out there. Savior Machine to name one.

Claire Laura

14y

@S3xPyst0l I know right! First thing people think, is that I'm emo. I HATE it. People should get used to change and just because I don't look like what everyone else does, doesn't mean they should judge me before they know me. :P x

alucard9971

14y

i agree with xTeaforTimex that twilight shouldnt be used for the gothic culture its all garbage every bit of twilight but any way epic video

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@GothicAaangel88 Just visis the lokal goth parties. ;)

Adrienne Bloodrose

13y

@artvampire Umm.. actually Goth and Gothic are two different things.. and btw who will stop me from comparing the two? >.>

maika raven

14y

When I heard this for the first time I heard I am gothic I am gay instaed of I am gothic I am pale.... I don;t know of somebody else it haert to.????

Alec Pitt

13y

@videocritic2463 Yes it does, submit to your inner darkness! Lol jk. I noticed that aspect of that comment too lol.

Alec Pitt

13y

whats with the floating twilight poster? and was there some ozzy in there? lol. Those goth rave chicks were freakin hawt though. Nice music, lyrics are... different, but its still chill. The goth rave chicks made this vid like a million times better though lol.

Graham Jones

12y

from an accountant in birmingham

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@softiegoth seems to me to be a quite obvious 'misheared lyrics' case ;)

Kate Gallagher

14y

@S3xPyst0l Agreed x

Marilyn Lavoie

14y

@softiegoth Hahaha I thought he said that too lol

FrightfulAccountant

15y

You can stream it from youtube? Videosoft Free Studio Manager ;)

Claire Laura

14y

@RESIFan2 exactly! haha

mrjakkertax

13y

@DrTran06 HEY!!! They are indeed.

Intensity In ten cities

Ddr is fun but this videos funnier

Adrienne Bloodrose

13y

@artvampire I will continue to do so and isnt it fun trying to correct someone half your age?

blakedmc1989DDRHD

10y↑8

DDR Ultramix 3 :)

AlanRickmanFan27 A Girl NOT A Boy

blakedmc1989DDRHD I heard this song on DDR ultramix 3 too! :)

blakedmc1989DDRHD

Victoria AlanRickmanFan27 Harrell i have tha game still lol

The XtremeBolt Guy

6y↑1

This person gets it!

Gunthagh

7y↑1

gothic is romanticism and vampirism so Twilight is super gothic!!

Cama Cafe

14y

rofl this video... this is... it's just wrong in a very funny way xD.

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@gorknox And maybe you take it a bit to serious? ;)

animallover2222

13y

@vitaemecha i do laugh at things that are offensive to gtohs. some stuff is freekin hillarious but this is offensive to me

animallover2222

13y

@XxAnimeKnowItAllxX i get alittle defensve cuz most people think the same and it annoys me. this song just didnt help + the orrigonal cxomment wasnt even me. it was my friend. regardless im chilled so its fine

MAZHAR ALPAY

why ı am here wtf

Alec Pitt

13y

@videocritic2463 notice my "lol jk" I was bein funny/sarcastic. lawl, and we are all somewhat insane like that lol.

Elluna Hellen

14y

@softiegoth Yeah ME! XD

Carrot

11y↑1

you're right that those steriotypes are wrong, but please. get a sense of humor

FrightfulAccountant

13y

@beckytheangel Nope, my ex did too ;)

S3xPyst0l

15y

ahhhh why is Twilight on this? there's nothing "gothic" about sparkling vampires....i'm not trying to be mean or anything but i think maybe at least Dracula would've been better. (x

FrightfulAccountant

13y

@52ntrue somebody called my name?

FrightfulAccountant

14y

@gorknox You are posting on a video that is all about joking being a goth/new wave fan for godsake. Nobody here is interested in your opinion about life an humanity. Get a life.