Institutionalized
Suicidal Tendencies Lyrics

Sometimes I try to do things and it just doesn't work out the way I wanted too
I attempt to complete tasks but they do not go according to my plans

And I get real frustrated, and its like
This makes me extremely annoyed and agitated

And I try hard to do it and take my time
I put in effort and give the task my full attention

And it just doesn't work out the way I want it too
Despite this, my efforts are still unsuccessful

It's like I concentrate on it real hard but it just doesn't work out
Though I focus on it intently, the task remains incomplete

And everything I do and everything I try, it never turns out
All of my attempts seem to fail, leaving me feeling discouraged

It's like I need time to figure these things out
I require additional time to contemplate and understand the situation

But there's always someone there going
However, there is always someone who interrupts me

Hey Mike: You know we've been noticing you've been having a lot of problems lately
People have been observing that I have been experiencing difficulties as of late

You know, maybe you get away, and like maybe you should talk about it,
Perhaps you should take a break and seek counsel to discuss your problems

You'll feel a lot better
Doing so could alleviate the burden on your mind

And I go: No it's okay, you know I'll figure it out
I refuse their advice and assure them that I am capable of handling it myself

Just leave me alone I'll figure it out
I ask to be left alone to solve the problem by myself

You know I'll just work it on myself,
I am confident in my own ability to solve the issue independently

And they go: Well you know if you want to talk about it I'll be here, you know
The people continue to offer their assistance and support

And you'll probably feel a lot better if you talk about it, so want don't you talk about it
They urge me to discuss my problems, as it may help alleviate my distress

And I go: No I don't want to, I'm okay, I'll figure it out myself
I reject their offer to talk, insisting that I am fine and capable of resolving the issue

And they just keep bugging me and they just keep bugging me
They persistently continue to pester me despite my resistance

And it builds up inside
This pressure and scrutiny leads to frustration and tension

So you're gonna be institutionalized
This problematic behavior will result in being institutionalized

You'll come out brainwashed with bloodshot eyes
As a result, you will emerge from this system manipulated and distressed

You won't have any say
You will lack any control over the situation and your own life

They'll brainwash you until you see their way
They will condition you until you adopt their views and perspectives

I'm not crazy - institution
I am not insane, despite being institutionalized

You're the one who's crazy - institution
It is those who are enforcing this system who are irrational and unreasonable

You're driving me crazy - institution
Their actions are causing me to feel mentally unstable and distressed

They stuck me in an institution
They forcefully committed me to a mental institution

Said it was the only solution
They claimed this was the only viable option for me

To give me the needed professional help
The intention was to provide me with required medical assistance and support

To protect me from the enemy - myself
They view me as a danger to myself and seek to protect me from my own behavior

I was in my room and I was just like staring at the wall thinking about everything
I was sitting alone in my room, contemplating my thoughts and life in general

But then again I was thinking about nothing
At times, deep thought would transform into empty-mindedness

And then my mom came in and I didn't even know she was there she called my name
My mother entered my room without me realizing as I was lost in thought

And I didn't even hear it, and then she started screaming: MIKE! MIKE!
I was so far deep in my thoughts that I did not even hear her call my name

And I go: What, what's the matter?
I finally responded, asking what was wrong

And she goes: What's the matter with you?
My mother inquired about my mental state

I go: There's nothing wrong mom
I assured her that I was perfectly fine and had no issues

And she goes: Don't tell me that, you're on drugs!
She did not believe me, and thought I was under the influence of drugs

And I go: No mom I'm not on drugs I'm okay, I was just thinking you know,
I deny her accusations and shared that my quiet behavior was due to deep thought

Why don't you get me a Pepsi
I attempted to divert the conversation by asking for a drink

And she goes: No you're on drugs!
She remained unconvinced and believed I was lying about my state

I go: Mom I'm okay, I'm just thinking
I tried to reiterate that I was just lost in thought

She goes: No you're not thinking, you're on drugs! Normal people don't act that way!
She insists that my behavior is abnormal and drug-induced

I go: Mom just give me a Pepsi, please
I continued to plead for a drink and to be left in peace

All I want is a Pepsi, and she wouldn't give it to me
Despite my requests, she refused to give me a drink

All I wanted was a Pepsi, just one Pepsi, and she wouldn't give it to me
I was fixated on simply receiving a drink, but my mother did not comply

Just a Pepsi
All I desired was one soft drink

They give you a white shirt with long sleeves
In a mental institution, patients are given a specific outfit to wear

Tied around you're back, you're treated like thieves
These clothes are restrained behind their back as a precaution against violent outbursts

Drug you up because they're lazy
Medical professionals may prescribe sedatives for their own convenience, rather than as necessary treatment for the patient

It's too much work to help a crazy
Mental illness patients may require a great deal of attention and assistance, which some medical professionals may not be willing to provide

I was sitting in my room and my mom and my dad came in
Once again, my parents barged into my room unannounced

And they pulled up a chair and they sat down, they go:
They then sat down and proceeded to have a talk with me

Mike, we need to talk to you
They begin by addressing me directly

Me and your mom have been noticing lately that you've been having a lot of problems,
They then go on to tell me their concerns about my problematic behavior

You've been going off for no reason and we're afraid you're gonna hurt somebody,
They fear that my behavior may lead to harm towards myself or others

We're afraid you're gonna hurt yourself
Specifically, they are concerned about the potential danger I am posing towards myself

So we decided that it would be in your interest if we put you somewhere
As a result of these concerns, they decided it necessary to take action

Where you could get the help that you need
They wanted me to receive aid for my struggles

And I go: Wait, what are you talking about, we decided!?
I am taken aback by their sudden decision

My best interest?! How do you know what's my best interest is?
I question their ability to know what is best for me

How can you say what my best interest is? What are you trying to say, I'm crazy?
I feel as though they are insulting my mental health and making assumptions

When I went to your schools, I went to your churches,
I list examples of mainstream institutions that I previously attended

I went to your institutional learning facilities?! So how can you say I'm crazy?
I point out the irony of them questioning my sanity, given my involvement in institutionalized education

They say they're gonna fix my brain
The medical team assures me that they can 'fix' my mental health

Alleviate my suffering and my pain
Their aim is to reduce and eliminate my symptoms of mental illness

But by the time they fix my head
However, the process of changing my mindset will take some time

Mentally I'll be dead
While they may be successful in treating my illness, it could mean losing my sense of self or individuality

It doesn't matter, I'll probably get hit by a car anyway
Regardless of the treatment I receive, I may still ultimately come to harm or injury