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Scott Bakula
by Sunspot

I used to watch Quantum Leap,
every night with my girlfriend.
Al and Sam, they leaped through time,
and I felt like they were my best friends.

Ziggy said there’s a 98 percent
chance of a broken heart.

Scott Bakula never played Dracula,
laid down the smackula on the bad guys.
He was honest and sharing and loving and caring,
the kind of guy who would always do the right thing,
Clever and handsome and so damn sensitive,
and I’m not… Scott.

He was sweet enough to tame the fire,
in that self-empowered Murphy Brown chick.
I even bought ‘Lord of Illusions’,
even though I thought that move kinda sucked.

Ziggy said there’s a 98 percent
chance that the ending’s sad.

Scott Bakula never smoked crackula,
he played quarterbackula in ‘Necessary Roughness’.

Scott Bakula never played Dracula,
laid down the smackula on the bad guys.
He was honest and sharing and loving and caring,
the kind of guy who would always do the right thing,
Clever and handsome and so damn sensitive,
and I’m not… Scott.

He’s nice enough to play a gay guy.
He’s cool enough to star in sci-fi.
He’s man enough to helm a starship,
and I’m the type of guy who would feel up that Vulcan chick.

Ziggy said there’s a 98 percent
chance that I’m a prick.

No one can love you like Scott Bakula can love you.
I’ll never be Scott Bakula,
He possesses all the traits that I sorely lackula,
Sometimes I just want to punch him in the sackula,
because I’m not Scott.

Contributed by Lucy Y. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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