The project of drummer and singer Nick Rattigan and guitarist Jacob Rubeck, Surf Curse formed in Reno in 2013, issuing their first album, Buds, later that June. An EP, Sad Boys, appeared in October, after which the band relocated to L.A., where they began to establish themselves in the city's vibrant underground scene. By 2017, they'd reemerged as part of the Danger Collective and released their second album, Nothing Yet. An update on the simplistic style of their debut, Surf Curse's sound began to soften somewhat as they explored new tones and slightly more complex song structures. This trend carried over to their third LP, 2019's Heaven Surrounds You, which was inspired by Rattigan and Rubeck's favorite cult movies.
Christine F
Surf Curse Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm losing my mind
Losing myself
Losing my head
Oh man I'm losing again
I said I'm losing my mind
Losing myself
Losing my head
Oh man I'm losing again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm losing my mind
Losing myself
Losing my head
Oh man I'm losing again
I said I'm losing my mind
Losing myself
Losing my head
Oh man I'm losing again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm losing my mind
Losing myself
Losing my head
Oh man I'm losing again
I said I'm losing my mind
Losing myself
Losing my head
Oh man I'm losing again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm losing my mind
Losing myself
Losing my head
Oh man I'm losing again
I said I'm losing my mind
Losing myself
Losing my head
Oh man I'm losing again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
I said I'm killing my time
Killing myself
Killing my friends
Oh man I'd do it again
The lyrics of Surf Curse's "Christine F" encapsulate a feeling of disorientation and self-destruction. With repeated and pounding phrases like "killing my time, killing myself, killing my friends," the song seems to be a primal scream of nihilism and despair. The repetition of the lines adds to the sense of being caught in a cycle of self-destruction that the vocalist is unable to break free from.
The last lines add some nuance to the song's bleakness, however. "I'm losing my mind, losing myself, losing my head" suggests that there is a sense of regret or sadness in what the singer is doing. They are aware that they are losing control, but they are powerless to stop it. The repetition of these lines also creates a sense of inevitability; the singer is resigned to their fate.
Overall, "Christine F" is a cathartic expression of pain and despair, a song that is at once raw and visceral but also hauntingly beautiful.
Line by Line Meaning
Killing my time
Wasting time without purpose
Killing myself
Harming and neglecting my own well-being
Killing my friends
Causing harm to those closest to me
Oh man I'd do it again
Expressing regret but also a willingness to repeat past mistakes
I said I'm losing my mind
Feeling mentally unstable and unable to cope with reality
Losing myself
Losing personal identity and sense of purpose
Losing my head
Feeling overwhelmed and out of control
Oh man I'm losing again
Expressing frustration and despair at a recurring pattern of failure
I said I'm killing my time
Repeating the same self-destructive behavior and not making positive changes
I said I'm killing myself
Acknowledging that actions are putting own life in danger
I said I'm killing my friends
Realizing harm caused to loved ones
I said I'm losing my mind
Continuing to experience mental instability
Oh man I'd do it again
Despite negative consequences, feeling drawn to repeat harmful behavior
I said I'm losing myself
Awareness of loss of personal identity and values
I said I'm losing my head
Feeling disoriented and unable to keep control
Oh man I'm losing again
Feeling overwhelmed by repeated failures and hopeless about the future
I said I'm killing my time
Surrendering to previous patterns of self-harm and inactivity
I said I'm killing myself
Continuing harmful behavior with disregard for own life
I said I'm killing my friends
Acknowledging responsibility for causing harm
I said I'm losing my mind
Feeling disoriented and troubled
Oh man I'd do it again
Admitting a draw towards repeating past mistakes
I said I'm losing myself
Feeling loss of identity and purpose
I said I'm losing my head
Feeling overwhelmed and unable to effectively manage life
Oh man I'm losing again
Feeling helpless and stuck in a negative cycle
I said I'm killing my time
Continuing to waste time and remain inactive
I said I'm killing myself
Increasingly putting own life in danger
I said I'm killing my friends
Continuing to cause harm to those closest to me
I said I'm losing my mind
Continuing to feel mentally unstable
Oh man I'd do it again
Despite repeated harm, still entertaining dangerous behavior
I said I'm losing myself
Continuing to lack a sense of identity and purpose
I said I'm losing my head
Continuing to feel out of control and overwhelmed
Oh man I'm losing again
Feeling defeated and powerless against negative patterns
I said I'm killing my time
Admitting to continued, unproductive idleness
I said I'm killing myself
Acknowledging increased dangerous behavior
I said I'm killing my friends
Realizing continued harm to loved ones
Oh man I'd do it again
Despite harm, continuing to be drawn to destructive behavior
I said I'm losing my mind
Continuing to experience mental instability
Losing myself
Continuing to lack a sense of personal identity and direction
Losing my head
Continuing to feel overwhelmed and out of control
Oh man I'm losing again
Feeling repeatedly frustrated and defeated
I said I'm losing my mind
Continuing to feel disoriented and unstable
Oh man I'd do it again
Continuing to repeat harmful behavior despite past regret
Contributed by Jack S. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
@potatocunt.4620
This is incredible... I'm a 27 old man who has struggled with body image issues all my life. I have had gynecomastia since I was 14 and it has pretty much destroyed my self esteem... But here is Jacob Rubeck embracing it with a circle of incredibly supportive friends. I know this clip depicts a cult indoctrination, but my god, I wish I was in this cult...Thank you Surf Curse for giving us hope.
@phillipm916
do push up
@burroughs5921
Damn bro. Gyno its the easiest surgery
@highsunn2486
they do it again...another stellar release
@TookAPhatShatProduct
High Sunn!!!! AHHHHHHH!!! UR great!!!
@highsunn2486
hahaa tyty :3
@laurensadler4238
this was actually the inspiration behind Ari Aster's film Midsommar
@alexr448
How do you know?
@emopapidiaz
Sure :p
@KENVAR08
Is this a true fact? If so 🔥🔥