Can I Speak to a Manager?
The Clockworks Lyrics

My God what a Palaver!
Oh my goodness, what a fuss and commotion!

I swear you could not write it
I promise you, this situation is so absurd that it couldn't even be fictionalized!

Bought that laptop I saved for
I finally purchased the laptop that I had been putting money aside for

Months to pay for, Bullet biting
It took me several months to save up enough money, and now I am feeling the financial burden

Wrong model and no charger
The laptop I received is not the correct model, and it didn't come with a charger

I telephone the centre
I call the customer service center

Throw half my credit on a Careless Whisper instrumental
I waste a significant portion of my phone credit while waiting on hold and listening to an instrumental version of 'Careless Whisper'

Tina's been a jobsworth
Tina at the customer service is only concerned with following the strict rules and procedures of her job

Using her work as a vehicle
Using her position as a means to exert her authority

All I want is a refund
All I desire is to be reimbursed for the incorrect laptop

All I'm getting is an earful
Instead of a resolution, all I am receiving is a barrage of complaints and criticism

Can I speak to a manager please?
May I have the opportunity to talk to someone in a higher position of authority?

Now at a loss I'm sitting
Feeling confused and helpless, I am currently sitting here in a state of uncertainty

Glazed eyed channel flicking
Mindlessly changing TV channels with a vacant expression

There's nothing on, I switch it
There are no interesting programs to watch, so I keep changing channels

Off, then on, then off again cause
Turning the TV on and off repeatedly because I'm bored and dissatisfied

The fridge is desolate and
The refrigerator is completely empty

This toast has been cremated
The toast I made has been burned to a crisp

God knows it's desperate when
It is a sign of desperation when

A shower is entertainment
Taking a shower becomes a form of entertainment because there's nothing else to do

I've been asking questions
I have been seeking answers and clarification

Using my Visa as a vehicle
Utilizing my Visa credit card as a means to pursue resolution

All I want is contentment
I only desire to be satisfied and at peace

All I've become is cynical
Instead, I have grown distrustful and pessimistic

All the faces are plastic
Everyone's expressions seem artificial and insincere

All the bands are elastic
The music bands are constantly changing and adapting

All the smiles are crooked
The smiles I encounter are deceitful and dishonest

All the conversation's practiced
Every conversation feels rehearsed and artificial

Can I speak to a manager please?
May I have the opportunity to talk to someone in a higher position of authority?