How to Save a Life
The Fray Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning | Line by Line Meaning
He walks, you say sit down, it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left, and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Let him know that you know best
'Cause after all, you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And I pray to God he hears you
And where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
The Fray's 2005 hit "How To Save a Life" is a song about trying to save a friend from self-destructive behavior or suicide. The song follows a conversation between two friends, one of whom is struggling with personal issues. The narrator of the song makes an effort to help the friend, but ultimately fails.
The first verse sets the scene for the conversation, with the friend smiling politely but not really hearing what's being said. The second verse describes the conversation itself, with the narrator laying out what the friend needs to do to get help, and then pleading with them to listen. The song ends with the narrator reflecting on their failure to save their friend and wondering where they went wrong.
The lyrics are powerful and emotional, and the song's catchy melody and chord progression make it a classic. It's a song that can resonate with anyone who has tried to help a friend in need and felt helpless.
Line by Line Meaning
Step one, you say we need to talk
You express the need to have a conversation with him
He walks, you say sit down, it's just a talk
He begins to leave, but you imply that it's not a big deal
He smiles politely back at you
He fakes a smile to acknowledge your presence
You stare politely right on through
You look at him, but there is no connection
Some sort of window to your right
There is a physical barrier between you and him
As he goes left, and you stay right
He goes his own way, and you go yours
Between the lines of fear and blame
There are unspoken emotions of fear and blame at play
You begin to wonder why you came
You question the purpose and value of the conversation
Where did I go wrong?
You question your own actions or decisions
I lost a friend
You lost his friendship
Somewhere along in the bitterness
The relationship turned sour or negative
And I would have stayed up with you all night
You were willing to go to great lengths for the friendship
Had I known how to save a life
If only you knew what to do or say to fix things
Let him know that you know best
You assert your authority or knowledge over him
'Cause after all, you do know best
You are confident in your opinions or suggestions
Try to slip past his defense
You attempt to get through to him despite his reluctance
Without granting innocence
You do not want to excuse or overlook any wrongdoing
Lay down a list of what is wrong
You point out the issues or problems with the friendship or situation
The things you've told him all along
You bring up the same concerns you've mentioned before
And pray to God he hears you
You hope that he will listen and understand your perspective
As he begins to raise his voice
He becomes more emotional or defensive
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
You stay calm and let him make a decision
Drive until you lose the road
He can choose to keep going until he's lost his way
Or break with the ones you've followed
He can choose to break away from past influences or relationships
He will do one of two things
His decision will fall into one of two categories
He will admit to everything
He will take responsibility for any mistakes or issues
Or he'll say he's just not the same
He will claim that he has changed or grown apart
And you'll begin to wonder why you came
Regardless of his choice, you will question the value of the conversation
How to save a life
The overarching theme of the song is about trying to repair a broken friendship
Lyrics © Wixen Music Publishing, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
Written by: Isaac Slade, Joseph King
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
Matteo Lemme
Step one, you say we need to talk
He walks, you say sit down, it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left, and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Let him know that you know best
'Cause after all, you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And I pray to God he hears you
And where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
SiMoRai
This song hits the spot, I couldnt listen to this for years without tearing up. 10 years ago, exept that I made the horrible mistake of not staying up with him(my best friend at that time) all night. I came over to his place with my car, a couple villages over, I hadnt seen him in quite some time, it was a saturday evening.
The vibe just wasnt so good, he was pretty bitter and depressed and I just wanted to chill and drink and have fun with him, but he didnt want to drink he wanted to do some pretty hard hallucinatic drugs(dmt) that i wasnt comfortable with since i've never had that before. Anyway i was supose to stay there and spend the night. However I decided to drive back a couple hours later and prefered to sleep in my own bed cus yea the vibe just wasnt so good.
The vibe wasnt good cus he was really feeling bad and had a lot of problems and weird ideas, I should have stayed and tried to change his mind or at the bare minimum just have the best time possible with him. Little did I know, allthough i had a very bad feeling in my guts driving away there, that would be the last time i'd ever speak to him again.
Weeks and months later when I just couldnt get a hold of him anymore I contacted him through whatsapp and email, but didnt get any response, I started to worry and went on facebook, I am and was never a fan of social media so I was barely ever on there, I contacted a mutual friend and he dropped the bombshell. Dude didnt you fucking hear yet? I Froze and allready felt it, I said; what? He hung himself, they found him hanging/rotting in another country in the middle of nowhere...
I found solice in believing it was a setup somehow, me and his younger brother that is. We investigated every trace he left behind and we told ourselves he must have been killed. But deep inside I know better, yet I still refuse to fully accept it.
I dont have any religion except for my own, but I do visit his grave from time to time and it gave me some sort of comfort, I used to curse and scold him and feel alot of anger towards him for leaving us all like that(suicide the coward way out), but now I just feel like part of me is burried there aswell and I just feel empty. And the understanding of how shit he must have felt to actualy kill himself is horrible. I blame myself for not being there for him when he needed me most. He was there for me in my darkest days, and I didnt return that favor.
I will never forgive myself. Dont make the same mistake I made, follow your gut feeling and heart and never ignore it. Spend as much time with your loved ones as you possible can. If you dont, you will end up regretting it sooner or later.
NW_Andrew_92
I feel you…. This happened to me almost a year ago… March 23.
On March 21, my best friend called me saying, “I was arrested can you bail me out”. I got the bonds number so I called them and they said it would cost 500$. I didn’t have 500$ at the time so I tried figuring out a solution.
Long story short, he just got a job making 150k$$$ yearly prior to his arrest. When his parents bailed him out, he called me to explain what happened and we talked for 2, almost 3hrs. He wasn’t depressed but he was humiliated.
He didn’t display any depression or suicidal tendencies and it wasn’t even on my mind that he would do that. At the time, I was in a programming course through the military so I cut our conversation short because I had to go to bed since it was almost midnight. I had an awful feeling in my gut after we got off the phone but I ignored it. Next day, I wanted to text him but I didn’t so he would have time to himself.
A week later, I received a phone call from a unknown number. I answered and it was the detectives wanting to question me about what our phone call was about. I explained and they also told me I was the last person her spoke with. I didn’t know his friends or family because he knew I don’t care much for random people. I was invited over to a bone fire to explain to 20-30 of his friends what our conversation was about.
That situation fucked me up so much I lost 40lbs in a few months after that incident. Overall, doing much better now but I feel I wasn’t as compassionate as I should have been and it’s a lesson to learn. Wish I had the chance to say I love you but I wasn’t one of those guys… now I am. He was the nicest fuckin guy with such a great personality.
Miss you buddy.
And sorry for your loss 💕
**sorry for any typos. I’m tired**
Something cool that happened .. 3 days before I received a call from the detectives..
My phone kept calling his phone once a minute for 5minutes. AND I DIDNT HAVE SIGNAL AT THE TIME SINCE I WAS IN THE COUTRY!!
The day before the detectives called, I cried and said, “Mel, just let me know if you’re alive or dead”. Next day I was woken up by the detectives.
Take care 💕
Mikabugg
All Motifs throughout the music video:
1: Love
7: Forgive
8: Hold Still
11: Remember
15: Let It Go
18: Talk to someone
22: Cry
23: Accept
36: Dont be scared of death
45: Touch
86: Open Up
Unnumbered:
- Laugh
- Live in Love
- Breathe
- Listen
- Release
- Have Faith
- Release the Fear
- Secure
- Surrender (listed as 14, 29, and 34)
Shock Puls
1. Love
2. Breathe
3. Fear
4. Release
5. Have faith
6. Dream
7. Forgive
8. Hold still
9. Lost
10. Run
11. Remember
12. Learn
13. Fun
14. Surrender
15. Let it go
16. Family
17. Leave
18. Talk to someone
19. Forget
20. Live
21. Listen
22. Cry
23. Accept
24. Keep your memories
25. Be kind
26. Question
27. Don't forget
28. Kiss
29. Touch
30. Open up
31. Don't get scared
32. Music
33. Lust
34. Trust
35. Say goodbye
I got most of em.
EzToolz
YouTube is the closest we'd probably ever get to a time machine.
Bradley Venter
Dope
Crs
our parents and grandparents...
Knighthawk
Beautifully said!!
lyianna _ xx
Nah there time capsules
So Smooth Savvy
No lie
INERTIA ALIVE
I lost my best friend to suicide several years ago, and the pain of his absence reverberates to this day. I was driving back from his funeral when this song came on, and it hit me like a thousand bullets.
"Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend. Somewhere along in the bitterness" - Those lyrics hit me harder than anything.
He called me the night before in tears, saying how much he loved me and that he'll see me again someday. I stayed on the phone with him for more than an hour begging and pleading that he stays on the phone to talk with me. The last words he said to me before he hung up on me were "I love you more than you could ever know, thank you". He shut his phone off afterwards, and I was no longer able to get a hold of him. I was oblivious, dumb and young. I didn't realize at the time he was holding a gun. I didn't realize he was so lost. It will eat me alive until the day my life comes to an end.
Please, love and cherish the friends you have. No one ever deserves to feel empty and lost when there are 8 billion people on this planet. Be there for the people who were there for you from the very start. I learned a life lesson that day, and it will forever be a piece of who I am. I love and miss you Collin 🖤
Brendan Flynn
i am sorry for your lost
Toxic Boxing
God bless you and his soul ✝️🙏
Jamie
Stories like these, make me scared to go, I don't want to hurt people.