The Gang
The Gang Lyrics

2005年我认识的这个人
I met someone in 2005

周末常混在北京的南城
I used to hang out in the southern part of Beijing on weekends

他在茶馆里说他的相声
He performed his comedic skits in teahouses

现在的他是最火的草根
Now he's the most famous grassroots comedian

床前明月光,疑似地上霜,举头望明月,我叫郭德纲
I'm looking at the moon and introducing myself as Guo Degang

大伙是愿意听啊,是愿意听啊,是愿意听?我决不强求
Would you all like to listen? I won't force you

这个世界真的奇妙
The world really is strange

速溶咖啡比茶还要经泡
Instant coffee is more time-consuming than tea

街上墨镜戴的不少
Many people wear sunglasses on the street

上过海选就带保镖
If you've been on a talent show, you'll need bodyguards

这个世界真太浮躁
The world is too impetuous

唱不清歌词还火爆
Singers who can't enunciate clearly are still popular

名人争着原告被告
Celebrities are eager to play the roles of plaintiff or defendant in lawsuits

连馒头也幸免不掉
Even steamed buns are not spared

刚刚好 我没恶搞
I didn't do anything bad

这事儿离现在不远,家里有老人的可以回去问问--在春秋战国时期啊
This happened not too long ago, but if you have elderly family members, you can ask them about it- it was during the Spring and Autumn and Warring States period

人来的不少,我很欣慰
I'm happy that many people came

啊~~你不知道我?我艺术家啊!我都艺术家一个多礼拜了
Ah, you don't know me? I'm an artist! I've been an artist for over a week now

如花pk了万人迷
Beautiful Flowers competed with a heartthrob

海选very了柯以敏
A talent show made Ke Yimin very popular

大s恋上周渝民
Da S fell in love with Zhou Yumin

李宇春长的不像姚明
Li Yuchun doesn't look like Yao Ming

奥斯卡请了章子怡
The Oscars invited Zhang Ziyi

打官司火了个黄圣依
Huang Shengyi became famous for a lawsuit

无极火了一个小网民
Wuji made a small internet celebrity famous

大侠挤爆了电视机
Heroes crowded the TV

刚刚好 我烦不了
I can't be bothered

流氓会武术,谁也挡不住
Gangsters know martial arts, and no one can stop them

这地上有一个人,天堂上就有一块表
If there's a person on earth, there's a watch in heaven

好人的表针儿转得慢,坏人的表针儿转得就快
The hands on a good person's watch turn slowly, while those on a bad person's watch turn quickly

刘刚,你要看看你的表吗? (刘刚说)想啊,我的表在哪呢? 哦――在上帝那屋当电扇呢
Liu Gang, do you want to check your watch? (Liu Gang says) yes, where is my watch? Oh, it's being used as a fan in God's house

娱乐圈呆长了心慌
People who work in the entertainment industry too long get anxious

明星们都担心走光
Celebrities are all worried about experiencing a wardrobe malfunction

狗仔队搞垮了情侣档
The paparazzi destroyed a couple's relationship

主持人最好港台腔
Hosts sound better with Hong Kong or Taiwan accents

晚会基本都是假唱
Most performances on variety shows are lip-synced

爆红需要中性长相
To become extremely famous, you need to have a neutral appearance

过去流行他得嘻唰唰
In the past, the Hi Sha Sha style was popular

混个脸熟春晚联唱
Become a familiar face and participate in the CCTV New Year's Gala

刚刚好 我没赶上
I missed it

这小伙子长得,把脸挡上跟演员似的
This guy covers his face like an actor

有缺房的 有缺车的 有缺钱的 有缺德的
There are those who need housing, a car, money, or a conscience

一毛钱一个的手榴弹,我先来1000块钱的炸你
Hand grenades cost a penny each, but I'll give you a thousand yuan to blow you up

法律要是不管我早打死他了
If the law didn't exist, I would've killed someone already

还有些什么 我们忘了纪念
We forgot to commemorate something

还有什么我们没有经验
There are things we haven't experienced yet

给一个断点
Give me a break

不敢再想从前
I don't dare to think about the past

刚刚好 我没沾边
I'm not involved

笑什么笑,再笑加钱
Why are you laughing? Laugh more and I'll charge you more