“Twenty first century folk for twenty first cent… Read Full Bio ↴St. Helens, England
“Twenty first century folk for twenty first century folk” ’
Ows tha doin cocker? Here’s some reet gradely stuff about everyone’s favourite North West folk singers the Lancashire Hotpots.
As we all know, the ‘Hotpots’ like Prestwich Hospital, are a long established Lancashire institution. They have been singing songs about the traditions and people of Bolton, Preston, Wigan and St Helens for nigh on 30 crackin’ years.
I’m sure thas all remembers back in’t 70s they had their legendary TV show ‘Shut Thi Trap’, just after Look North West, when Stuart Hall was on it wi John Mundy. There they’d sing the songs from't past that the owd ‘uns all sing along to. Eee, I remember it well, all’t classics such as
‘Down’t Pit, Down’t Mill, Down’t t’hole int’ ground’
‘Favver, has tha seen me cap?’
‘Ee, I think thas got rickets!’
’Giz Six pints o’mild, I’is planning to get ratted’
In recent times there’s bin a change of line up fert Hotpots which has seen the arrival of three new members Dicky Ticker, Bernard Thresher and Bob Wriggles. This injection of young blood has seen a change of direction fert group who have decided ter embrace the young ‘uns and try and get them into our traditional music. It’s hard getting them to listen mind, one minute they want folk on, the next minute its folk off!!
So the lads has written them a new style of folk song just fer them. Its “twenty first century folk for twenty century folk” they say and they hope all young ‘uns across thi land will enjoy their new sound!
T'hotpots can recommend those Emmet lads if tha fancies a bit o' that rumpy thumpty dance music.
The Beer Olympics
The Lancashire Hotpots Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
But just how can we ensure that we take gold?
But then I had a thought
Make drinking beer an Olympic sport
And now let my masterplan unfold (because)
I wanna put drinking beer in the Olympics
We'd all be world class athletes you and me
And be top of the medal table
I'm going to the bar for Team GB
Well, I could drink 10 pints sat in me vest
Trying to break me personal best
There'd even be medals for queuing at the KFC
From now on going out on the lash
Will all be funded by lottery cash
So I'm going to the bar for Team GB
So getting bladdered now becomes intensive training
And I'm exercising at the pub week in week out
And I've got, on a retainer,
Johnny Vegas as me personal trainer
And we're drinking bitter, lager, cider ale and stout!!
I wanna put drinking beer in the Olympics
We'd all be world class athletes you and me
We'll drink till we're unstable
And be top of the medal table
I'm going to the bar for Team GB
Yes, it's gymnastics now
Let's check on Willie Eckerslike in the vault
I'm told he's no longer in the vault
He's now in the lounge undertaking the synchronised drinking
Let's check the marks from the judges
5.6, 5.8, 5.9 percent alcohol
He's done it!
Gold for Britain!
Well, I could drink 10 pints sat in me vest
Trying to break me personal best
There'd even be medals for queuing at the KFC
From now on going out on the lash
Will all be funded by lottery cash
So I'm going to the bar for Team GB
Now drinking lager, the Germans they'd be competition
And for vodka the Russians would put up a fight I guess
But drinking till you're chaotic
Will finally be patriotic
Has anyone got Seb Coe's email address?
I wanna put drinking beer in the Olympics
We'd all be world class athletes you and me
We'll drink till we're unstable
And be top of the medal table
I'm going to the bar for Team GB
Kriss Akabusi - Alright!
In The Lancashire Hotpots's "The Beer Olympics," the singer proposes a masterplan to ensure that Britain takes gold at the Olympics coming to the country in 2012. Rather than relying on traditional sports, the singer suggests that drinking beer should become an Olympic sport. He argues that they could all become world-class athletes by drinking beer, with the added benefit of being funded by lottery cash. Going out on the lash would become a form of intensive training, with the singer joking that he could drink 10 pints in his vest trying to break his personal best. The singer envisions a future where getting bladdered at the pub becomes a patriotic act.
The lyrics of "The Beer Olympics" are humorous and tongue-in-cheek, showing that the band isn't taking themselves too seriously. They playfully suggest that drinking beer could be just as valid an Olympic sport as any other, with queues at KFC and synchronized drinking becoming medal-worthy events. In a way, the song is a commentary on British drinking culture and the way that it's so integral to the national identity. Rather than trying to deny this, the band leans into it, suggesting that drinking could be considered a form of training for the Olympics.
Line by Line Meaning
Now the Olympics come to these fair isles in 2012
The Olympics are happening in the UK in 2012, and we need to make sure we win.
But just how can we ensure that we take gold?
We need a plan to win the most gold medals.
But then I had a thought
An idea came to mind...
Make drinking beer an Olympic sport
Let's make beer drinking an actual Olympic sport.
And now let my masterplan unfold (because)
I have a master plan to make this happen, and I'm going to tell you about it now.
I wanna put drinking beer in the Olympics
This is my plan to win gold medals - by making drinking beer an official Olympic event.
We'd all be world class athletes you and me
We'll all become amazing athletes just by drinking lots of beer.
We'll drink till we're unstable
We'll drink so much that we'll become practically unable to stand.
And be top of the medal table
We'll win so many gold medals that we'll be at the top of the medal table.
I'm going to the bar for Team GB
I'll be drinking for Team GB to help us win gold.
Well, I could drink 10 pints sat in me vest
I'm so good at drinking that I could drink 10 pints while sitting in my undershirt.
Trying to break me personal best
I'm always striving to improve my beer drinking skills.
There'd even be medals for queuing at the KFC
Even waiting in line at KFC will be rewarded with medals.
From now on going out on the lash
Getting drunk and partying will now be a legitimate training activity.
Will all be funded by lottery cash
We'll be able to get drunk and party with the support of lottery funding.
So I'm going to the bar for Team GB
I'll be doing my patriotic duty by drinking for Team GB.
So getting bladdered now becomes intensive training
Getting drunk is now considered intensive training for the Beer Olympics.
And I'm exercising at the pub week in week out
I'm practicing my beer drinking skills at the pub every week.
And I've got, on a retainer, Johnny Vegas as me personal trainer
I've hired Johnny Vegas as my personal trainer to help me improve my beer drinking skills.
And we're drinking bitter, lager, cider ale and stout!!
We're practicing drinking a variety of different beers, ales, and ciders.
Yes, it's gymnastics now
Beer drinking is now considered a legitimate gymnastics event.
Let's check on Willie Eckerslike in the vault
Let's see how Willie Eckerslike is doing during the Beer Olympics.
I'm told he's no longer in the vault
Willie Eckerslike has moved on from his previous event.
He's now in the lounge undertaking the synchronised drinking
Willie Eckerslike is competing in the synchronised drinking event.
Let's check the marks from the judges
Let's see how Willie Eckerslike scored in the event.
5.6, 5.8, 5.9 percent alcohol
Willie Eckerslike scored high, with alcohol percentages of 5.6-5.9.
He's done it!
Willie Eckerslike has won the gold medal!
Gold for Britain!
Great Britain has won the gold medal in the beer drinking event.
Now drinking lager, the Germans they'd be competition
The Germans would be tough competitors in the Beer Olympics for beer drinking events.
And for vodka the Russians would put up a fight I guess
The Russians would be tough competitors in vodka drinking events.
But drinking till you're chaotic
The British have a secret weapon - they can drink until they're completely unstable.
Will finally be patriotic
Drinking until you're completely unstable will now be considered a patriotic activity.
Has anyone got Seb Coe's email address?
We need to make sure Seb Coe is on board with our plan to make beer drinking an Olympic sport.
Kriss Akabusi - Alright!
Celebrating our upcoming success with a shoutout to Kriss Akabusi.
Contributed by Evan N. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
What a load of trash
Great song
Father A Wall
God bless Leyland. God bless Lancashire, la la la 😂
Simon Lehan
The Lancashire hotspots