Darnielle began the new millennium with The Coroner's Gambit for Absolutely Kosher before signing to 4AD for the release of the surprisingly polished Tallahassee in 2002. We Shall All Be Healed followed in 2004, and one year later, Darnielle was back with The Sunset Tree. Remaining as prolific as ever, Darnielle turned away from the intensity of The Sunset Tree for a calmer, more reflective set of songs on 2006's Get Lonely. The accessible and assured Heretic Pride appeared in 2008. Next up was the Bible verse-inspired The Life of the World to Come, the group's sixth album for 4AD, in 2010. Switching to Merge Records in 2011, Darnielle released All Eternals Deck, which was recorded in four different studios in Brooklyn, Boston, North Carolina, and Florida with four different producers -- John Congleton, Scott Solter, Brandon Eggleston, and Morbid Angel guitarist and Hate Eternal frontman Erik Rutan -- helming various tracks. That year the band was also handpicked by Jeff Mangum of Neutral Milk Hotel to perform at the All Tomorrow's Parties festival that he was curating in Minehead, England, but they were ultimately unable to appear due to scheduling issues.
Autoclave
The Mountain Goats Lyrics
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As my last chance to feel human begins to vaporize
Maybe it's the heat in here, maybe it's the pressure
You ought to head for the exits, the sooner the better
I am this great, unstable mass of blood and foam
And no one in her right mind would make her home my home
My heart's an autoclave
When I try to open up to you I get completely lost
Houses swallowed by the earth, windows thick with frost
And I reach deep down within, but the pathways twist and turn
and there's no light anywhere, and nothing left to burn
And I am this great, unstable mass of blood and foam
And no emotion that's worth having could call my heart its home
My heart's an autoclave
My heart's an autoclave
I dreamt that I was perched atop a throne of human skulls
On a cliff above the ocean, howling wind and shrieking seagulls
And the dream went on forever, one single static frame
Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name
And I am this great, unstable mass of blood and foam
And no one in her right mind would make her home my home
My heart's an autoclave
My heart's an autoclave
The song "Autoclave" by The Mountain Goats explores the difficulty of connection and vulnerability. The song begins with the singer asking someone to look him in the eyes as he struggles to hold onto his humanity. He suggests that the heat and pressure of the situation are making him unstable and urges the other person to leave before it is too late. The metaphor of being an "unstable mass of blood and foam" further emphasizes the singer's feelings of instability and lack of control.
As the song progresses, the singer acknowledges his struggle to open up and connect with others. He describes the feeling of being lost and unable to find a way to truly connect, even when he reaches out. He acknowledges the darkness within himself, but suggests that this darkness is what makes it difficult for him to connect with others. The line, "no emotion that's worth having could call my heart its home," suggests a deep feeling of loneliness and isolation.
The final verse of the song describes a dream in which the singer is perched on a throne of human skulls, emphasizing the darkness and instability within him. However, the line "sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name" suggests a desire for connection and belonging despite the difficulties.
Overall, "Autoclave" is a powerful exploration of the struggle to connect with others and the isolation that can come from feeling like an unstable and unpredictable force in the world.
Line by Line Meaning
Hand me your hand, let me look in your eyes
Let us connect in a moment of genuine intimacy before my emotional breakdown
As my last chance to feel human begins to vaporize
I am losing touch with my own humanity and becoming overwhelmed with emotion
Maybe it's the heat in here, maybe it's the pressure
I am searching for an external cause to blame for my internal turmoil
You ought to head for the exits, the sooner the better
I am aware that my issues are not yours to deal with, and it would be wise for you to distance yourself from me
And no one in her right mind would make her home my home
Even I recognize that I am not fit for another person to love or care for
My heart's an autoclave
My heart is a machine designed to sterilize and destroy any love or feeling that tries to enter it
When I try to open up to you I get completely lost
My attempts to open up and be vulnerable only lead me deeper into confusion and despair
Houses swallowed by the earth, windows thick with frost
My emotions are overwhelming and suffocating, leading to the destruction of the structures in my life
And there's no light anywhere, and nothing left to burn
My emotions have consumed everything within me, leaving me completely empty and devoid of hope
And I dreamt that I was perched atop a throne of human skulls
My subconscious is consumed with imagery of death and destruction, further fueling my emotional turmoil
Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name
Despite my emotional isolation, I still crave the human connection that comes with being known and understood
Lyrics © SCHUBERT MUSIC PUBLISHING INC.
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