Suicidal Thoughts
The Nortorious B.I.G Lyrics


Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴

Hello? Aw shit, nigga
What the fuck time is it, man?
Oh goddamn, nigga
Do you know what time it is?
Aw shit, what the fuck's goin' on? You aight?
Nigga, what the fuck is wrong with you?

When I die, fuck it, I wanna go to hell
'Cause I'm a piece of shit, it ain't hard to fuckin' tell
It don't make sense, goin' to heaven with the goodie-goodies
Dressed in white, I like black Timbs and black hoodies
God'll prob'ly have me on some real strict shit
No sleepin' all day, no gettin' my dick licked
Hangin' with the goodie-goodies, loungin' in paradise
Fuck that shit, I wanna tote guns and shoot dice (You talkin' some crazy shit now, nigga)
All my life I been considered as the worst
Lyin' to my mother, even stealin' out her purse
Crime after crime, from drugs to extortion
I know my mother wish she got a fuckin' abortion
She don't even love me like she did when I was younger (Get a hold of yourself, nigga)
Suckin' on her chest just to stop my fuckin' hunger
I wonder, if I died, would tears come to her eyes?
Forgive me for my disrespect, forgive me for my lies
My baby mother's eight months, her little sister's two
Who's to blame for both of them? (Nah, nigga, not you)
I swear to God I want to just slit my wrists and end this bullshit
Throw the Magnum to my head, threaten to pull shit (Nigga, what the fuck?)
And squeeze until the bed's completely red (It's too late for this shit, man)
I'm glad I'm dead, a worthless fuckin' buddha head
The stress is buildin' up, I can't, I can't believe (Yo, I'm on my way over there, man)
Suicide's on my fuckin' mind, I wanna leave
I swear to God I feel like death is fuckin' callin' me
But nah, you wouldn't understand (Nigga, talk to me please, man)
You see it's kinda like the crack did to Pookie in New Jack
Except when I cross over, there ain't no comin' back (Yo, I'ma call you when I get in the car)
Should I die on the train track like Ramo in Beat Street?
People at the funeral frontin' like they miss me (Ayo, where your girl at, man?)
My baby mama kiss me, but she glad I'm gone (Yo, put your girl on the phone, nigga)
She know me and her sister had somethin' goin' on
I reach my peak, I can't speak (Ayo, you listenin' to me, motherfucker?)
Call my nigga Chic, tell him that my will is weak (Ayo, c'mon, nigga)
I'm sick of niggas lyin', I'm sick of bitches hawkin'
Matter of fact, I'm sick of talkin'
(Ayo, Big, ayo, Big)





Please hang up, and try your call again
Please hang up, this is a recording

Overall Meaning

In the song "Suicidal Thoughts" by The Notorious B.I.G, the rapper is having a conversation on the phone with someone who's trying to help him through his suicidal thoughts. The song begins with a phone ringing and the person on the other end asking if Biggie is okay. The rapper answers by saying that he wants to go to hell when he dies because he sees himself as a worthless, immoral person, and accordingly, he would fit in more in hell then heaven. He explains that he has always been a bad person throughout his life and that he knows his mother wishes she had never given birth to him. In the second verse, he continues to express his desire to end his life, discussing how he would do it and what he would leave behind. He is clearly in a dark place, struggling with feelings of worthlessness and the belief that everyone would be better off without him.


Overall, the song is a raw and brutal take on mental health and suicide. It depicts the intense pain and hopelessness that can come with depression and shows us the importance of reaching out to those we know who are struggling with mental health issues. It also showcases the inner demons that Biggie was dealing with at the time, which gave his music a unique edge while simultaneously making him a relatable and personable artist to many fans.


Line by Line Meaning

Hello? Aw shit, nigga
The singer is disturbed and frustrated by the phone call he received.


What the fuck time is it, man?
The singer is disoriented and unaware of the time.


Oh goddamn, nigga
The singer is experiencing extreme emotional distress.


Do you know what time it is?
The artist is trying to figure out the time to assess the reason for the phone call.


Aw shit, what the fuck's goin' on? You aight?
The artist is worried that the person on the other end of the phone is in trouble.


Nigga, what the fuck is wrong with you?
The singer is becoming agitated and frustrated with the person on the other end of the phone call.


When I die, fuck it, I wanna go to hell
The singer does not want to go to heaven despite the typical religious narrative of good overcoming evil.


'Cause I'm a piece of shit, it ain't hard to fuckin' tell
The artist has poor self-esteem and feels unworthy of entering heaven.


It don't make sense, goin' to heaven with the goodie-goodies
The artist believes that the good people in heaven would be incompatible with his personality and preferences.


Dressed in white, I like black Timbs and black hoodies
The artist prefers dark colors and streetwear rather than traditional 'heavenly' clothing.


God'll prob'ly have me on some real strict shit
The singer expects that if he did end up in heaven, God would hold him to high ethical standards.


No sleepin' all day, no gettin' my dick licked
The artist believes that traditional pleasures and indulgences would not be allowed in heaven.


Hangin' with the goodie-goodies, loungin' in paradise
The singer finds the idea of being in paradise with 'good' people undesirable and boring.


Fuck that shit, I wanna tote guns and shoot dice
The singer romanticizes a dangerous and violent lifestyle instead of conventional religious morality.


All my life I been considered as the worst
The singer has a deep-seated sense of inadequacy and worthlessness.


Lyin' to my mother, even stealin' out her purse
The artist has a history of dishonest and immoral behavior.


Crime after crime, from drugs to extortion
The artist has committed multiple crimes and acts of exploitation against others.


I know my mother wish she got a fuckin' abortion
The singer feels that his existence has caused his mother pain and disappointment.


She don't even love me like she did when I was younger
The singer perceives a decline in love and affection from his mother over time.


Suckin' on her chest just to stop my fuckin' hunger
The artist reflects on his infant dependency on his mother's breast milk.


I wonder, if I died, would tears come to her eyes?
The artist is unsure if his mother would mourn his death.


Forgive me for my disrespect, forgive me for my lies
The artist asks for forgiveness for past mistakes and wrongdoings.


My baby mother's eight months, her little sister's two
The singer is responsible for two young children, including an unborn child.


Who's to blame for both of them? (Nah, nigga, not you)
The artist's friend calls out his responsibility for the children and his culpability in their eventual fate.


I swear to God I want to just slit my wrists and end this bullshit
The singer expresses deep despair and suicidal thoughts.


Throw the Magnum to my head, threaten to pull shit (Nigga, what the fuck?)
The singer contemplates committing suicide with a handgun.


And squeeze until the bed's completely red (It's too late for this shit, man)
The singer describes a violent fantasy of shooting himself until the bed is bloody and makes it clear that it is too late to prevent him from taking drastic action.


I'm glad I'm dead, a worthless fuckin' buddha head
The artist views himself as already dead and worthless.


The stress is buildin' up, I can't, I can't believe
The artist feels overwhelmed by stress and cannot believe what he is thinking and feeling.


Suicide's on my fuckin' mind, I wanna leave
The singer is preoccupied with thoughts of suicide and desires to escape his life.


I swear to God I feel like death is fuckin' callin' me
The singer believes that death is imminent and 'calling' him to end his life.


But nah, you wouldn't understand (Nigga, talk to me please, man)
The artist believes that his friend cannot comprehend the depth of his pain and hopelessness and begs for understanding and support.


You see it's kinda like the crack did to Pookie in New Jack
The artist compares his suicidal tendencies to the character in the film New Jack City, who became addicted to crack cocaine and eventually killed himself.


Except when I cross over, there ain't no comin' back (Yo, I'ma call you when I get in the car)
The artist acknowledges that dying by suicide is final and there is no possibility of coming back to life.


Should I die on the train track like Ramo in Beat Street?
The singer considers different methods of suicide, including dying on a train track like the character in the film Beat Street.


People at the funeral frontin' like they miss me (Ayo, where your girl at, man?)
The artist is cynical about the sincerity of mourners at his funeral and is annoyed that his friend is not providing emotional support.


My baby mama kiss me, but she glad I'm gone (Yo, put your girl on the phone, nigga)
The singer believes that his baby mama is secretly happy that he has died and would like to speak to his friend's girlfriend for comfort.


She know me and her sister had somethin' goin' on
The singer confesses to having an affair with his baby mama's sister.


I reach my peak, I can't speak (Ayo, you listenin' to me, motherfucker?)
The singer has reached the limit of his emotional capacity and is unable to articulate his thoughts and feelings clearly.


Call my nigga Chic, tell him that my will is weak (Ayo, c'mon, nigga)
The artist asks his friend to call another friend and confess that he is feeling suicidal and helpless.


I'm sick of niggas lyin', I'm sick of bitches hawkin'
The artist is frustrated with the dishonesty of others and the general negativity of his surroundings.


Matter of fact, I'm sick of talkin'
The singer is done talking and contemplating suicide.


(Ayo, Big, ayo, Big)
His friend is calling out his name, trying to get his attention to prevent him from doing anything drastic.


Please hang up, and try your call again
This is a recording, signaling the end of the song.


Please hang up, this is a recording
This is a recording, signaling the end of the song.




Lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Peermusic Publishing
Written by: Christopher Wallace, Robert Hall

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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Most interesting comment from YouTube:

@SLNDRPLYS

Life sucks.
People suck.
Many feel the same.
Doesn’t make it better.
In a time where we fight against separation, I’ve never felt so separated.

Help is around the corner.
That’s hard for a paralysed person to make that distance.

Life doesn’t stop.
Life doesn’t wait.
It’s so divided.

Gen-Z expects perfection.
Perfection is a blind person’s vision.

We hate the pain we are given.
That’s the price we pay for being overpopulated with opinion.

All I can say dude,



Don’t

It’s not worth it. We know reality sucks yet we expect death to be better. There’s a huge chance it’s worse.

It seems impossible to live but it passes. I know that’s agonising to hear, but this universe is huge - everything’s possible. Even if everything feels lost.

Please... don’t - life is something that does indeed suck and it’s pure hell but I guess that’s it, I made it through the pain. It took years, at the start I didn’t see a way out. Yet I made it? I think.



All comments from YouTube:

@ariannasprings3235

"i wonder if i die, would tears come to her eyes?"

@user-jd5df9ln2j

Deep

@rawkus1562

Arianna Springs I feel that line

@braysway10

hell no. not in this day in age when everyone is a fucking narcissistic. life is fucking meaningless

@barcelonacoolness

@@braysway10 yeah I'm sick of people in modern society, my only friends are minorities even though I'm white cause at least they understand how fucked society is.

I'm sick of how complacent and accepting of society white people are in America. They don't see a problem with the direction society is headef in.

@kenxiijose8044

If u think this song is dark ur not listening. Well your listening but not hearing shyt

68 More Replies...

@timevariant8355

Song is honestly a literal representation of how badly so many of us feel. Honestly so poetic in my opinion. But so many will hate it cos of toxic positivity

@chasemanhattan9995

I hope God dies

@dsrree

The relatable lyrics about death and suicide is why $uicideboy$ are huge right now. And biggy was doing this 30 years ago.

@paddyopatrick2941

@@dsrree I have no propensity for self harm but I find I am regularly and at great length every day thinking about suicide. I have no intention of ever inflicting harm on myself but yet it is probably my most consistent thought through a day.

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