Hey Nonny Nonny
The Poxy Boggards Lyrics

A pretty girl men fight for
Men have gone to war over a beautiful woman

They've even started wars.
Wars have been initiated because of a woman's beauty

How pretty does she have to be
What level of attractiveness must a woman attain

When she's down upon all fours?
To what extent must she submit to be considered beautiful

I find the ones who aren't so pretty
Less attractive women are actually more valuable

Are diamonds in the rough.
Their true worth is hidden and undiscovered

Cause pretty girls may look good
Beautiful women may be pleasing to the eye

But the ugly know their stuff.
Less-attractive women have greater skills and abilities

Just spend the night with Mabel.
To overcome fears, spend an evening with a woman named Mabel

I overcame my fears
I was able to conquer my anxieties

By going to the Gock and Bulls
By visiting a specific place

And drinking fifteen beers.
By consuming a large amount of alcoholic beverages

She'd do it all night long that girl
Mabel is eager and persistent in her sexual pursuits

She never calls it quits
She doesn't stop until she is satisfied

And her favorite way to please you
Mabel's preferred method of sexual gratification

Is by rubbing with her...
Involves a specific action that is not explicitly stated

Be they ugly or unsightly
Regardless of a woman's looks

Or just plain make you sick.
Even if you find them unappealing

Every girl is pretty
Each woman has her own beauty

With her lips wrapped 'round your...
While engaged in specific sexual acts

Hey Nonny Nonny
A nonsensical phrase used for emphasis

Hey Hey Hey
Another nonsensical phrase used for emphasis

Mad Hellen is from Bedlam
Mad Hellen is from an insane asylum

She sees fairies, ghosts, and spots.
Hellen experiences hallucinations and delusions

Her face is worn and drizzled
Her face shows signs of aging and weariness

And her hair is all in knots.
Her hair is tangled and unkempt

And when I get down off that ship
After completing a voyage

I run straight to her bed
He goes to be with Mad Hellen

'Cause crazy girls do crazy things
Mad Hellen's behavior is unpredictable and wild

Whilst giving you some...
During sexual activity

Well Clair is such a scrawny girl
Clair is thin and unimpressive

As short as she is thin
As small in height as she is in weight

With buck teeth and a lazy eye
Her teeth protrude and one eye appears unfocused

And warts upon her chin.
Bumps are visible on her chin

But when she gets a man in bed
Despite her unappealing looks, she is skilled in bed

She'll toss him like a rock
Clair is enthusiastic and energetic during sex

It's like the devil takes her
She becomes possessed with sexual energy

When she's gnawing on my...
While engaged in specific sexual acts

Well Madge is not a pretty one
Madge is unattractive

She frightens all the boys.
Boys are scared of her

But if they'd only knew about
If they were aware of

The techniques she employs.
Madge is skilled in a specific area

She'll swirl and twirl and spin you
Her sexual techniques are varied and unique

Then point it at her bum.
Madge enjoys anal sex

Then grin that toothless smile
Madge has missing teeth but is still happy

While she's gargling your...
During a particular sexual act

There's Gertie from Newcastle
Gertie is from Newcastle

Who smells like fish and beer.
Gertie has an unpleasant odor

She's got one brow across her head
Gertie has a unibrow

And a cyst upon her rear.
There is a growth on her buttocks

But once you get to know her
After spending time with Gertie

You'll really love that lass.
She becomes more appealing after you get to know her

For when she goes to work
During sexual activity

She'll suck the bed sheets through your...
Gertie is proficient in a particular act of oral sex