Heaven
The Rascals Lyrics


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I wish I believed in me like everybody else does
We can be anything but I'm in denial
I can't get off the speed
My heart is on trial
It's been about a week since I've seen my smile
Four days and I still can't sleep
I can't go outside no
Addiction really killing me
But it takes a while
I can see the pearly gates even through a blindfold
I feel like a waste of space
Throw me in a pile
How can anyone say that they love me
Let alone like me
I could never trust you
Cause you told me that you move to spite me
I'm countin' my money and I'm countin' my days
I'm loathing this life and I'm numbin' my brain
I'm not ready to face a change
No not now
I'm countin' my money and I'm countin' my days
I'm loathing this life and I'm numbin' my brain
I'm not ready to face a change
I'm not ready to
Ties are meant to be severed not forgotten
This time in my life feels rotten
Everywhere I go I feel eyes watchin' my moves
I remember all the days that I used to frolic
I don't know what made me stop it
My mind filled with chemicals and toxins
I'm deluded
I'm the worst to me nothin' tops it
I think I need some treatment call a doctor
When people see me they can call it
I've lost some screws
I'm sittin' by myself so who is that talkin'
I'm the king in the land of melancholy
Imma sign my name in blood with a ball pen
For your amusement
I'm countin' my money and I'm countin' my days
I'm loathing this life and I'm numbin' my brain
I'm not ready to face a change
No not now
I'm countin' my money and I'm countin' my days
I'm loathing this life and I'm numbin' my brain
I'm not ready to face a change
I'm not ready to




I'm not ready to
I'm not ready to

Overall Meaning

The Rascals’ song “Heaven” is about struggling with addiction and self-doubt. The singer of the song wishes that they could believe in themselves the way that other people do. They acknowledge that they have the potential to be anything, but are in denial about their addiction and are unable to overcome it. They express the physical and emotional toll of their addiction, including their inability to sleep and lack of self-worth. The singer reflects on their past and how they used to enjoy life, but now they feel trapped by their addiction and the judgement of others. They are not ready to face a change and continue to live in their numbed state.


The lyrics of “Heaven” provide a raw and honest depiction of addiction and its effects on the individual. The singer feels isolated and alone, unable to trust anyone else. They describe a feeling of being watched and judged everywhere they go, adding to their sense of vulnerability.


Overall, “Heaven” is a powerful song about the struggles of addiction and the difficulty of overcoming it. Through their lyrics, The Rascals capture the mental and emotional toll that addiction can take on a person, while also acknowledging the potential for change and growth.


Line by Line Meaning

I wish I believed in me like everybody else does
I lack self-confidence despite others' belief in me.


We can be anything but I'm in denial
I deny my potential despite the possibilities.


I can't get off the speed
I struggle to quit my drug addiction.


My heart is on trial
My emotions are being judged and tested.


It's been about a week since I've seen my smile
I haven't felt happy or content in a week.


Four days and I still can't sleep
I suffer from insomnia for four days straight.


I can't go outside no
My addiction prevents me from going outside.


Addiction really killing me
My addiction is destroying me physically and mentally.


But it takes a while
Quitting addiction is a slow and challenging process.


I can see the pearly gates even through a blindfold
I'm aware of my eventual death and afterlife.


I feel like a waste of space
I feel like I serve no purpose and am useless.


Throw me in a pile
I feel worthless and like I belong with the trash.


How can anyone say that they love me
I struggle to believe that anyone genuinely loves me.


Let alone like me
I struggle to believe that anyone genuinely likes me.


I could never trust you
I have trust issues and can't confide in others.


Cause you told me that you move to spite me
I feel like others' actions are always directed against me.


I'm countin' my money and I'm countin' my days
I'm aware of my limited time and resources.


I'm loathing this life and I'm numbin' my brain
I dislike my life and use substances to escape reality.


I'm not ready to face a change
I'm afraid and resistant to making any life changes.


No not now
I'm not ready yet and need more time.


Ties are meant to be severed not forgotten
Relationships should end cleanly rather than be ignored.


This time in my life feels rotten
I'm going through a difficult and unpleasant period in my life.


Everywhere I go I feel eyes watchin' my moves
I feel like I'm constantly being judged by others.


I remember all the days that I used to frolic
I recall happier times in my life when I was carefree.


I don't know what made me stop it
I'm not sure why I stopped enjoying life.


My mind filled with chemicals and toxins
My brain is affected by the drugs and substances I use.


I'm deluded
I have a false perception of reality.


I'm the worst to me nothin' tops it
I have low self-esteem and think poorly of myself.


I think I need some treatment call a doctor
I acknowledge that I need professional help for my addiction and mental health.


When people see me they can call it
Others judge me and label me based on my appearance.


I've lost some screws
I'm not mentally stable and have lost my mind a bit.


I'm sittin' by myself so who is that talkin'
I feel alone but hear voices and negative self-talk.


I'm the king in the land of melancholy
I feel like I rule over my own sadness and depression.


Imma sign my name in blood with a ball pen
I'm willing to make a permanent, drastic change in my life.


For your amusement
I'm willing to make a change to entertain or satisfy others.


I'm not ready to
I'm still not prepared to make any changes in my life.


I'm not ready to
I'm still not prepared to make any changes in my life.


I'm not ready to
I'm still not prepared to make any changes in my life.




Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid
Written by: Suicide Rascal

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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