I Will Not
The Vindictives Lyrics


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I will not be found with a bullet in the head
With a gun in my mouth curled up in my bed
Standing on the ledge looking down at the street
Diving on the people underneath my feet

I will not
I will not
I can hear you calling, but I will not
I know you wanna make me, but I will not

I will not lie me down on the tracks of a train
I will not use a knife to disconnect my veins
I will not close my eyes, I will not shut my mouth
I will not, I will not, I will not I will not
I will not

I will not go insane, I will not be the same next week
I will not go gently into the big sleep

I will not hide
I will not run
You cannot make me
I know what's going on

I will not
I will not
I will not

I will not play dumb
I will not be fooled
I will not be used by any one of you

I will not
I will not, I will not

I will not be a man
I will not bear a cross
I am moving on and you can't turn me off

I will not
I will not, I will not
I will not mind my own business
I will not beg for forgiveness




I will not be embarrassed to piss on all you cherish
I will not, I will not, I will not

Overall Meaning

The Vindictives’ song “I Will Not” is a defiant and unyielding response to the often overwhelming pressures to conform to societal norms and expectations. In the verses of the song, the singer describes several scenarios in which they will not succumb to the temptation to end their own life, whether by suicide or by submitting to the power and influence of others. The pre-chorus and chorus of the song reinforce this message of independence, with the repeated refrain of “I will not” serving as a declaration of autonomy and self-determination.


The verses of the song depict three different scenarios in which the singer is presented with the option of self-destruction: by gunshot, by train, and by jumping off a building onto the people below. In each case, the singer adamantly declares that they will not give in to these desires and will choose to live on their own terms. The chorus of the song broadens the theme of self-determination to include other aspects of life, such as the ability to resist manipulation or to refuse to be embarrassed or ashamed of one’s actions.


“I Will Not” is a powerful and resonant expression of defiance and resistance, and its message is one that speaks to anyone who has ever felt the weight of social pressure and conformity. It is a rallying cry for individuality and self-expression, and a reminder that no matter what obstacles one may face, the power of choice and agency is always within us.


Line by Line Meaning

I will not be found with a bullet in the head
I refuse to end my life with a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.


With a gun in my mouth curled up in my bed
I will not give up on life and commit suicide alone in my bed with a firearm in my mouth.


Standing on the ledge looking down at the street
I will not put myself in harm's way by standing on a high ledge and contemplating suicide.


Diving on the people underneath my feet
I refuse to end my life by jumping off a high place and landing on unsuspecting people.


I can hear you calling, but I will not
I am aware of your pleas and suggestions, but I will not follow them.


I know you wanna make me, but I will not
I acknowledge that you want to influence my decisions, but I am determined to stand my ground and not give in to your desires.


I will not lie me down on the tracks of a train
I will not end my life by lying down on railway tracks and waiting for an approaching train to run over me.


I will not use a knife to disconnect my veins
I refuse to commit suicide by using a sharp object to sever my veins and bleed to death.


I will not close my eyes, I will not shut my mouth
I will not stop being vigilant and vocal about my choices and beliefs.


I will not go insane, I will not be the same next week
I will not allow external pressures to drive me to the brink of insanity and change who I am as a person.


I will not go gently into the big sleep
I refuse to meet my end gently or peacefully, as I am determined to fight for my beliefs and my life till the very last moment.


You cannot make me
No one has the power to control or influence my choices, as they are mine alone to make.


I know what's going on
I am aware of the situation and the implications of my decisions.


I will not play dumb
I refuse to pretend that I am ignorant or unaware of what is happening around me.


I will not be fooled
I will not fall for deceitful or misleading statements or actions designed to influence me.


I will not be used by any one of you
I will not allow others to take advantage of me, manipulate me or use me for their own personal gain.


I will not be a man
I will not adhere to societal expectations or traditional gender roles.


I will not bear a cross
I refuse to carry the weight of others' expectations or burdens on my shoulders.


I am moving on and you can't turn me off
I am moving forward in my life and cannot be dissuaded or persuaded to stop by anyone or anything.


I will not mind my own business
I refuse to be apathetic or indifferent towards the concerns of others and will speak up when necessary.


I will not beg for forgiveness
I refuse to apologize for being true to myself or for making decisions that are right for me.


I will not be embarrassed to piss on all you cherish
I refuse to be ashamed of my actions or beliefs, even if they go against the norms of society or the expectations of others.




Contributed by Maya T. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Comments from YouTube:

@hooligan7784

Love The Vindictives!!!!

@shabadoha007

This song is amazing. Thank you for posting.

@Snarlez

I will not... I will not,, I will not.  I love this band song and his struggle.  I am Bi-Polar and this song makes me feel sane at times.

@xibalbavalkyrie

I almost attempted when my partner passed......life became cold and complicated, this song spoke to me .....I WILL NOT!
Miss you Jason.......

@joesmith4309

after my brother killed himself, this was my song. It speaks to me so much. I WILL NOT.

@hooligan7784

I'm so sorry

@CORBYPUNK

so many times i get on the edge , and this on my ipod means far too much

@jamiecashes

Haven't heard this in a hott minute, thanx! Cheers, oi!

@whycantibefree

i love this shit

@denversexton7182

Thank you

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