Rap Like Me
Too $hort Lyrics

Rap like me, you'll go straight to the top
If you emulate my style of rapping, you will achieve success and recognition

Keep doing what you're doing and you're sure to get dropped
If you continue rapping in your own style, you will face failure and be ignored

Like a trick, nothing's even up my sleeve
I am so skilled in rapping that my talent appears effortless and natural

A million albums sold and it's hard to believe
I have achieved such a high level of success, selling a million albums, and it may be difficult to comprehend

Well it's true homeboy, it's not a lie
I assure you that my success is real and not fabricated

I used to sell tapes on Sunnyside
I started my career by selling music tapes in the Sunnyside area

I used to catch the 40 bus around the way
I would travel around the area using the 40 bus

Me and Fred Benz, slanging tapes
My friend Fred Benz and I were selling tapes

All these things, that we did
We hustled and worked hard to establish ourselves in the music industry

Grab the microphone and start screaming 'Bitch!'
When I take the stage, I deliver powerful and provocative lyrics, exclaiming 'Bitch!'

You fronting MC, I hate to cap
You, as a mediocre rapper, are pretending to be something you're not, and I dislike it

You make hit records and you still can't rap
Despite your commercial success, your skills as a rapper are lacking

I said it before, I'll say it again
I have emphasized this point previously, but I will reiterate it

You don't believe me, ask your fans
If you doubt my statement, consult your own fans and listeners for confirmation

When I walked into Cali, the place was packed
When I entered California, the venue was crowded and energetic

Sir Too $hort 'Don't stop that rap'
The audience affectionately refers to me as 'Sir Too $hort' and encourages me to continue my rap performance

I keep rapping my rhymes, all the time
I consistently deliver my crafted rhymes and lyrics during my performances

You got no rhymes, so you listen to mine
Your lack of originality and creativity in your own raps leads you to rely on listening to my rhymes

I'm not starting a fight, just telling it right
I am not looking for conflict, but simply stating the truth and setting the record straight

The best damn rapper who ever grabbed the mic
I am widely regarded as the greatest rapper to ever take hold of a microphone

His name is Too $hort, now shut your mouth
My name is Too $hort, so cease your criticisms and close your mouth

In '81 I was rocking the house
I was a prominent and influential figure in the music scene in 1981, captivating audiences with my performances

I'm a hustler, baby, coming up
I am a skilled and ambitious individual, continually striving for success and recognition

I hustle every day and I don't sell drugs
I work hard and engage in various business ventures, but I am not involved in selling drugs

I don't run no gangs, don't shoot no dice
I have no affiliation with gangs and do not partake in gambling

Gave the same damn speech to the Oakland vice
I have addressed the law enforcement authorities in Oakland with the same message numerous times

But if you keep pushing, just like you
If you continue to provoke and challenge me, similar to your current behavior

When they see me on the strip, coming through
When people observe me on the streets, passing through the neighborhood

I break it down so vicious it'll break your back
I deliver my rap lyrics in a powerful and aggressive manner that can overwhelm and defeat my opponents

With the beat so loud playing Too $hort raps
The instrumental and backing music playing loudly complement my raps, enhancing the overall experience

That's it, I'm set
I have achieved my desired level of success and satisfaction

No need to talk that bullshit
There is no reason to engage in meaningless and insincere conversations

I need a, Oaktown, big-time sound
I require a distinctive and high-quality musical style that represents Oakland, California

Just enough beat to get on down
The music should have an optimal rhythm that compels listeners to dance and enjoy the experience

So, you other rappers listen to mine
I advise other rappers to pay attention and learn from my style and techniques

You wouldn't catch Short Dog rapping nursery rhymes
You won't ever see me, known as Short Dog, rapping simplistic and childish nursery rhymes

Call my rap trash, jam the junk
If you criticize my rap as being worthless, then go ahead and disregard it

Put a sticker on the cover: 'X-Rated Funk'
To denote the explicit and provocative nature of my music, affix an 'X-Rated Funk' sticker on the album cover

It's just me, you say I won't go far
Despite your skepticism, I will undoubtedly achieve great success and recognition

But I won't stop rapping cause I rap so hard
My passion for rap is unwavering, and I continue to deliver powerful performances

From here to New York, back to California
My influence and impact extend from the West Coast to the East Coast and back

I bumped your girlfriend, don't say I didn't warn ya
I had a sexual encounter with your girlfriend, and I remind you that I had given you a warning

All this time you said she's your ho
Throughout your relationship, you claimed ownership over her, calling her your 'ho'

You really shouldn't give baby all that dough
You should not shower her with excessive money and gifts

She gave it all to me cause I fuck so good
She willingly handed over everything because I am exceptionally skilled in bed

I practice on the girls in my neighborhood
I gain experience and refine my abilities by engaging in sexual relationships with the girls in my local area

Cause when I'm freaky I rap, I spit a rap to a freak
When I am in a sexual and explicit mindset, I express it through my rap lyrics, particularly targeting sexually adventurous individuals

I rarely ever think about a sucker MC
I rarely devote my thoughts and attention to subpar MCs who lack skill and talent

I go platinum, it's just like slapping 'em, bitch
When my album reaches platinum status, it is an act of triumph and superiority over my critics

Short Dog in the house, starting some shit
As Short Dog, I assert my presence and stir things up within the music industry

MC's rock and MC's roll
MCs engage in rockin' and rollin' performances, delivering their unique brand of music

But the albums they make never go gold
Despite their efforts, their albums consistently fail to reach gold status

When I was young, I knew I'd be one of the best
Even during my youth, I possessed the confidence and foresight that I would become one of the greatest in the industry

Every time I made a song it came out so fresh
Each song I created had a unique and innovative quality, impressing listeners

I was the king of the Oaktown, spitting my game
I held a dominating position in the Oaktown music scene, showcasing my impressive skills and charisma

10 years later, ain't nothing changed
Even after a decade, I remain consistent and unchanged in my status and abilities

Still the Boss of the Bay, and I know what they say
I am still regarded as the leader of the Bay Area music scene, and I am aware of the reputation that precedes me

They call me 'Godfather' and they call you 'Gay'
I am referred to as the 'Godfather' of the industry, while you are mocked with the insulting label of 'Gay'

Bitch! It's 1990
I assert my dominance and superiority by reminding everyone that it is the year 1990

Your girlfriend's out there trying to find me
Your girlfriend is actively seeking me out, indicating her interest and attraction towards me

She heard about me, I fucked her best friend
Having heard about my reputation, she engaged in a sexual encounter with her closest friend

I guess she wants to see if I can do it again
Her curiosity drives her to test whether I can replicate the same satisfying experience with her

You want to be like me, so damn bad
You desperately aspire to emulate me and my status in the music industry

The impossible dream all you MC's had
Your aspiration to become like me is considered impossible and unrealistic by other MCs

If you could rap like me, you wouldn't have the dream
If you possessed the same rapping skills as me, you wouldn't need to dream of becoming like me

Start rapping quit flapping like a chicken wing
Instead of aimlessly boasting and making empty claims, focus on improving your rap skills

If could rap like me, they say you're so great
If you possessed the ability to rap like me, others would consider you highly talented and exceptional

But when they talk about you, they say you're so fake
However, when people discuss you, they describe you as insincere and lacking authenticity

And as the days go by, you can't forget
As time passes, it becomes impossible for you to overlook or ignore the impact I have had on the industry

The way I make you feel like shit
My demeanor and successful career have a significant impact on your self-esteem, making you feel inferior and inadequate

MC's like you, I've seen 'em before
I have encountered countless MCs like you in the past, so your presence does not faze me

You keep on saying 'Fuck Too $hort'
You persistently express your dislike and contempt for me, stating 'Fuck Too $hort'

But I'm a better MC than you
However, I maintain that I am a superior MC compared to you

And ain't a damn thing you can do, but bitch
You are incapable of doing anything except complaining and expressing discontent

On the TV screen, in the magazines
I frequently appear on television screens and in magazines, gaining widespread visibility

When they interview you, you just make up things
During interviews, you fabricate information and create false narratives

You're on an ego trip and you're fronting like you're down
You are consumed by your ego and pretending to be authentic and connected to the scene

You're not the first real rapper from the Oakland town
In reality, you are not the original and genuine rapper representing the Oakland area

You're just a new jack, and you can't even rap
You are merely a novice and incapable of delivering skilled rap performances

You want to trip? Trip on that
If you want to challenge me, direct your criticism towards that fact

I'm like MC Lyte, checking hoes tonight
Similar to MC Lyte, I scrutinize and assess women tonight

If you're not a real rapper, get off the mic
If you lack the authenticity and talent required to be a true rapper, vacate the microphone

Cause with a fake MC, a song's never complete
A song can never reach its full potential when performed by an inauthentic and untalented MC

You'd better learn to rap like me
I advise you to acquire the skills and style necessary to rap like me

Whenever I rap, you call it noise
You dismiss my rap performances as mere noise

I'm tearing up shit up like the Acorn Boys
I cause chaos and create an impact similar to the notorious Acorn Boys gang

On 10th street, I got a big freak
I am associated with a sexually adventurous woman on 10th street

Until you learn to speak, realize you're weak
Until you develop the ability to rap effectively, recognize your lack of skill and potential

Cause it's the Oaktown, and they all get down
In the Oaktown music scene, everyone engages in energetic and lively performances

To the rhythm of the Too $hort funky sound
The energetic performances coincide with the rhythm of my distinctive and funky music

It goes boom, baseline's on ya
The music features a booming sound with a prominent bassline

Dangerous Crew from Oakland, California
The Dangeroud Crew, hailing from Oakland, California, contributes to the vibrant music scene

Bitch don't front cause Short Dog is hard
Do not pretend to be unimpressed or unaffected by my talent as Short Dog

If you answer my rap, I tear your ass apart
If you retaliate against my rap with your own performance, I will skillfully dismantle your efforts

Just like this, it lasts forever
My rap performances leave a lasting impression and impact

You make a song and I make one better
Regardless of your attempts, I am capable of creating superior songs

You say I cuss, I say you're fake
You criticize my use of profanity, but I argue that your entire persona is inauthentic

Your eyes pop open like paper plates
Your reaction is exaggerated and comical, as if your eyes were popping out like paper plates

You fronting MC, I hate to cap
You, as a mediocre rapper, are pretending to be something you're not, and I dislike it

I make hit records with the vicious raps
I have achieved commercial success by producing impactful and hard-hitting rap songs

I said it before, I'll say it again
I have emphasized this point previously, but I will reiterate it

The boy ain't nothing but one of my fans
You are simply one of my fans, and your attempts at rivalry are futile

He's like silicon titties, can you feel 'em?
You are artificial and insincere, just like silicone breast implants

How can a fake rapper fuck with a real one?
You, as a counterfeit and untalented rapper, are unable to compete with a genuine and skilled artist like me

Shit, I'm that rapping man
Indeed, I am the epitome of a talented and impactful rapper

I like you like the Klu Klux Klan
I despise you just as much as I despise the racist organization, the Ku Klux Klan

Motherfucker want to front on me?
You, as a disrespectful individual, dare to challenge and oppose me?

My posse got a real MC, Too $hort
I am supported by my crew, who recognize that I am a genuine and talented MC

And it don't stop, and it don't stop, and it won't stop
The music and my career have a relentless and unstoppable momentum

Cause I'm Too $hort baby on the microphone and I'm macking, bitch
As Too $hort, I dominate the microphone with my mackin' style and attitude

Now back to the subject, my boy MC
Returning to the primary focus, we address the subject of my fellow rapper MC

Whatever you say, you can't rap like me
Regardless of your claims or statements, you are incapable of matching my rap skills

Rappers like me make real hits
Artists like me consistently produce successful and impactful songs

Rappers like you talk bullshit
On the other hand, rappers like you deliver empty and inauthentic lyrics

I told my boys there's a new Funky Drummer in town
I informed my friends and associates that a talented new artist has emerged in the music scene

You're trying to be like James Brown
You aspire to emulate the iconic musician James Brown

If I couldn't be me, who would I be?
If I were not myself, I would not even consider being anyone else

I damn sure wouldn't be a sucker MC
I absolutely would not stoop to the level of being a weak and talentless MC

'Cause I'm not like you, my game is true
I am fundamentally different from you, as my skills and persona in the rap game are genuine and authentic

I pimped these hoes and I pimped you, too
I have been involved in pimping women, and I have manipulated and controlled you as well

Cause I'm boss, and boss makes the rules
As the boss in this industry, I dictate and establish the rules that others must follow

You disobey and you be a fool (Now listen)
If you choose to disregard my authority, you will face negative consequences and appear foolish

One, remember how it all began
Firstly, recall and acknowledge the origins of this rap journey

Don't guess, the answer is 'Oakland'
Do not speculate, as the definite answer is 'Oakland'

Two, you'd better learn to rap like me
Secondly, it would be beneficial for you to acquire the skills and style necessary to rap like me

Or you like to be a fake MC
Otherwise, you prefer to remain a fraudulent and untalented MC

Three, never talk down on a player
Thirdly, avoid undermining or disparaging an accomplished and respected individual like me

I wouldn't care if you was Fred Astaire
Even if you possessed exceptional talent like Fred Astaire, it would not affect my attitude towards you

Last but not least, number four:
Lastly, the fourth point is as follows:

Don't ever fuck with Too $hort, bitch
Absolutely never attempt to mess with or challenge Too $hort, you disrespectful individual