I Don't Know
Ash International [R.I.P] Lyrics

I don't know why I wrote this verse
I'm not sure why I'm writing this, maybe because I need an outlet or some therapy

Maybe I'm sad or something
My emotions are unclear, but there's a possibility that I'm sad

Maybe this is me Finally thinking that
Maybe this is just me finally coming to terms with my feelings

I need an outlet or Some therapy or something
I need to find a way to express myself and cope with my struggles

But this pen and paper free though But not royalty Forgot it comes with a fee though
Writing is an outlet that doesn't cost money, but I need to remember that I might not get paid for it

Something to be said About a K1NG with a team though
Being a leader and having a team is impressive

Even more when every time He tries to elevate them all They just up and flee though
It's frustrating when people don't appreciate your efforts to help them

Never once did he fleece those That asked for his assistance a Little But Bo peeped that they were Sheep, though
He never took advantage of those who asked for help, but he noticed that they were naive and easily led astray

Dad called weekly To tell me to vet the People I called close
My dad advises me to be cautious about who I trust

'Cause everybody can't go with me I listened but What that get me besides a reset
Not everyone can be a part of my journey, but I still feel lost despite taking my dad's advice

Creativity's draining And the water's in recess Trying to stay sharp every month To avoid regress but
I'm struggling to maintain my creativity and keep improving

I would rather dead it If I feel it isn't the best so
I don't want to release anything subpar

So many other things to assess
I have other priorities and concerns to focus on

I'm listening to my wife Laugh and joke with her Mother Meanwhile my Mama think I'm a hellspawn at best
My wife's family is supportive, but my own mother disapproves of me

No such thing as normal convos, They just end in her screaming At me to come home more Or being passive aggressive To make me change my tone or
Talking with my mother is always tense and unpleasant

Bringing up some time that I messed up, and wondering Why the hell I don't phone more Holding on to grudges I don't quite have the time for
She holds onto past mistakes and resents me for not calling more often

People dropping dead and yet We mad again, what for My homie Brian lost his Ma So did KnightWolfe and Charm But for some reason Everything I do for mine is wrong
We're fighting about petty issues while our loved ones are dying

Maybe it's 'cause I dropped out And never finished school Maybe it's because i love to rap And she don't think it's cool
My mother disapproves of my choices in life

Maybe it's because When family asks what I do She ain't been able to say proudly What her K1NG has grown into
My mother is ashamed of my career choices

I relate to all the stories That Joe Budden been through Crazy when you hear The trials and tribulations and Decisions he had to make but Can't relate to his breakthrough
I empathize with Joe Budden's struggles, but I haven't experienced that level of success

How many times I gotta reset And do a take two How many take twos you get Before you end it all How many times you end it Before starting anew
I'm tired of starting over and over again

What kind of hellish test Am I putting my psyche through How many times I gotta Redefine my circle huh
I'm questioning my choices and whether they're worth the mental strain

How many nights I'm disappointed Cause they sensitive How many times I gotta Learn to get thicker skin
I'm tired of being let down by fragile people, and I'm trying to toughen up

How many people around me I got that are depending On me to make it Sounds like flattery the way They praise me, but Once I can't create they get away from me
There are many people counting on me, but I feel used when they disappear as soon as I can't produce anymore

I understand there's purpose in the journey But I hate to see the Other side of me growing impatient From waiting to make it
I know the journey has meaning, but I'm struggling with impatience

I dunno why I wrote Maybe I'm hoping money can fix it As soon as I Got an idea to get it And I do But the stages are currently In its infancy
Maybe I'm hoping that financial success can solve my problems, and I have an idea for achieving it

And I know money can't fix everything But the way I see it, it might Because it has the ability To ease my life and Reassure my wife That everything gon' turn out alright And et my parents know they good And taken care of for life And then my friends that's still here That come along for the ride They get to say I knew LJ Before all the hype It sounds nice to me, don't it
Money can't solve all problems, but it could make things easier for me and my loved ones, and it would be satisfying to prove people wrong and succeed

But right now it's like / Almost three in the morning But I'm up and still going/ And God's got it through it all So I'mma still go in / I know you heard this part before But I'mma say it again / You don't know what to expect do you Just expect nothing less than the best When I drop projects, EPs, loose raps, Twitch streams, podcasts, all that...
Despite my struggles, I'm still working hard, and I promise to deliver quality content