I'm Not Afraid To Die
Avion Roe Lyrics
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And what was I chasing my mind was racing I kept myself in doubt
But other than you hell I feel sick we were all torn up and out
And every step I take you're not there at all, at all, at all
You turned your back and I never looked back
And in half the time it was up to the fact that it's all,
Out of my control
You turned your back and I never looked back
And in half the time it was up to the fact that it's all,
Out of my control
It's out of my control
In another damn place it's another day wasted I can't keep up I've found
And in our defense I can not convince you I kept my heart rate down
And all of our lies well they caught up, in the end I'll find you out, and
Every step I take you're not there is the answer to the loss in you
You turned your back and I never looked back
And in half the time it was up to the fact that it's all,
Out of my control
It's out of my control
You turned your back and I never looked back
And in half the time it was up to the fact that it's all (its all)
Out of my control
Well it's out of my control
The truth is I can run and hide and stare (but I can't)
I am not afraid to die
Am I pretending to be scared?
I am not afraid to die
What's the point in leaving
Is there any point in leaving
Is there any hope at all?
I'm not leaving
No I'm not leaving
Well I am not afraid to die
I am not afraid to die
I am not afraid to die
Wasn't it over? It never was over
You turned your back and I never looked back
And in half the time it was up to the fact that it's all,
Out of my control
It's out of my control
In "I'm Not Afraid to Die," Avion Roe explores themes of regret and loss over a failed relationship. The first verse details the singer's feelings of aimlessness and uncertainty in the wake of the breakup. They feel sick, lost, and doubtful about what they were pursuing. The chorus repeats that the situation is "out of my control," highlighting the singer's feelings of powerlessness and lack of agency in this situation. They feel abandoned and alone as they try to move forward.
The second verse takes a more accusatory tone as the singer lays blame for the failed relationship on their partner. They couldn't convince them, and their lies caught up with them in the end. The repeated line "every step I take you're not there" emphasizes the emotional distance between the two and the hurt that the singer is feeling. The bridge introduces the idea of death, asking if there's any point in leaving, and the repeated line "I am not afraid to die" suggests a willingness to face whatever comes next. The final verse brings everything back around to the central theme of control, as the chorus repeats that the situation is out of their control, but the final line - "it never was over" - suggests a continued sense of longing and unresolved feelings.
Line by Line Meaning
Another day wasted my hands were shaking I'm lost and breathing out
I'm feeling defeated and aimless today, my anxiety has taken hold of me and I'm barely surviving.
And what was I chasing my mind was racing I kept myself in doubt
I'm not sure what I was trying to achieve, my thoughts were scattered and I doubted myself at every turn.
But other than you hell I feel sick we were all torn up and out
When I'm not with you, I feel terrible, and everyone is struggling and coming apart.
And every step I take you're not there at all, at all, at all
I feel alone and lost without you, and every move I make is a painful reminder of your absence.
You turned your back and I never looked back
You left me without warning and I never tried to regain contact with you.
And in half the time it was up to the fact that it's all, Out of my control
I quickly realized that the situation was beyond my influence or management.
In another damn place it's another day wasted I can't keep up I've found
Every new location is the same dreary experience, and I can't seem to keep up with anything anymore.
And in our defense I can not convince you I kept my heart rate down
I tried to argue our case, but you weren't swayed, and I kept calm through it all.
And all of our lies well they caught up, in the end I'll find you out, and
Eventually, our dishonesty caught up with us, and I'll be the one to expose the truth.
Every step I take you're not there is the answer to the loss in you
The fact that you're not here with me is proof of the emptiness and pain you're feeling.
The truth is I can run and hide and stare (but I can't)
I may try to escape or ignore the truth, but ultimately, I can't.
I am not afraid to die
I've accepted the inevitability of death and I don't fear it.
Am I pretending to be scared?
Do people think I'm putting on an act of being scared or unsure when I'm really not?
What's the point in leaving, Is there any point in leaving, Is there any hope at all?
Why bother leaving when there doesn't seem to be any hope or meaning left?
I'm not leaving, No I'm not leaving
Despite the despair and hopelessness, I won't give up or abandon everything.
Well I am not afraid to die
I don't have a fear of dying.
Wasn't it over? It never was over
I thought things were finished, but they've never really ended.
Out of my control
I don't have any power over the current situation.
Contributed by Molly Y. Suggest a correction in the comments below.