grand dark feelings of emptiness
Bonnie 'Prince' Billy Lyrics

Well I felt like I was born today
I had the feeling of starting over, as if I were reborn today

So I took it upon me to go away
To gather my thoughts, I went away

To gather my thoughts and go away
I left to gather my thoughts and get away from everything

Where I could (be used by) somebody
Where I could be of use to someone

Now over the hill, like always you know
As usual, over the hill are Billy, Frankie, Henry, and Joe

Were Billy and Frankie and Henry and Joe
My acquaintances who are always present over the hill

And they beat and broke me hard and slow
They physically and emotionally harmed me in a harsh and gradual manner

To prove I was nobody
To establish that I was insignificant

And no-one I was and so I remained
My identity was stripped away, and I remained as no one

Knocked-out in a hut, no mother, no name
I was unconscious in a small building with no mother, no name

And filled up my heart with one and the same
I felt an intense emotion that consumed my entire heart

That grand dark feeling of emptiness
That emotion was a great and dark, yet empty feeling

And was it a friend that turned me loose
I wonder if it was a friend who set me free

Or was it a girl come to baste my goose
Perhaps it was a girl who came to prepare dinner for me

Or was it my great god who laid on his finger
Maybe it was my deity who granted me freedom

And started my clock anew
And gave me a fresh start

Ah no, it was rain ; ah no, it was gunning
No, it was neither rain nor shooting that set me free

It was point-break and buckle
It was a physical force or ordeal that caused it

And singing and cunning
And a combination of music and sharp thinking

That skinned me, re-skinned me
That stripped away layers of my being, and built me back up

And started me running
And set me on a path of escape

And I never looked back from then on
Since then, I’ve never wanted to look back

And now I am learning bit by bit
I’m gradually learning now

About the make and model shit
About the intricacies of life

The muddy bowl I live in it
The murky environment of my existence

And all the mucks that tire us
And how everything weighs us down

And I'm afeared if I don't have
I’m afraid that if I don’t have

A piglet, lamb or little calve
A small animal like piglet, lamb, or calf

I'll chop my human-ness in half
My humanity will be destroyed

And be as worm or virus
I’ll be reduced to a worm or virus-like being

But kids I've had, and they are sung
But I’ve had children who are celebrated in song

Upon folks' ears my babes are hung
My children’s stories are told to people’s ears

Rhythmically they live among
They lead a rhythmic life

And grow but don't get old
They mature, but they don’t age

Not in a box, not in a void
Not confined to a box or an emptiness

Not if their voice is never hoid
Not if their voice is never heard

Nor if no-one repeats a woid
Nor if no one repeats a word

But if their tune is told
But if their story is told

Then we can age and fall away
Then we can grow old and eventually die

To meet again some golden day
To meet again someday in a cheerful place

And fill it in our happy way
And live it happily

In starlight and in gold
In a wonderful and beautiful place