I Really Don't Hate Christmas
Dr. Doofenshmirtz Lyrics
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And my birthday is a mess!
New Year's is a lot of noise
And Arbor Day's a pest!
Halloween's a horror,
But I guess I must confess
That I really don't hate Christmas!
April Fool's is just a bore
Mardi Grass a waste
Unless you own a candy store
All these other holidays
I can admit that I abhor,
But I really don't hate Christmas
Now it isn't that I like it,
At the most I feel ambivalence!
But should I really just destroy it?
I'll admit that I'm still on the fence
It makes me tense!
From the evil scientist community
I'm sure to get ejected
But for Christmas I can seem to summon
Any true invective
Because what is there to hate?
I mean it's really so subjective!
Though I really don't hate Christmas
I hate puppy dogs and kittens,
I hate flowers in the Spring!
I even hate the sunshine
And the birdies when they sing
I can work up animosity for almost anything
Tell me why I don't hate Christmas
Though my childhood was atrocious,
Christmas never was that bad, you see!
So the best that I can muster
Is complete and total apathy
What's wrong with me?
How can I prove that I'm
An evil villain worth his salt
When with a holiday so jolly
I can't even find a fault?
If I didn't feel ambiguous
I'd launch a big assault!
But I really don't hate Christmas!
Ah what the heck? Kick line!
No I really
No I really don't hate Christmas!
I have an intense burning indifference!
Dr. Doofenshmirtz’s song “I Really Don’t Hate Christmas” is a humorous exploration of the hard-hearted villain’s feelings towards the holiday season. In the song, Dr. Doofenshmirtz expresses his disdain for most holidays, including Valentine’s Day, Arbor Day, Halloween, and Flag Day, but surprisingly admits that he does not hate Christmas. The song delves into the reasons why Dr. Doofenshmirtz can’t summon any true invective towards the holiday, even though he dislikes most things. He thinks that his childhood memories of Christmas were not that bad, and perhaps that’s why he can’t find any fault with the holiday.
Despite his low opinion of most holidays, Dr. Doofenshmirtz’s ambivalence towards Christmas seems to puzzle and frustrate him. As an evil villain, he feels like he should be able to hate the day with more passion. Although he feels like he should launch a big assault on Christmas, he cannot find any reason to do so. In the end, Dr. Doofenshmirtz concludes that he has an intense burning indifference towards Christmas.
Overall, the song is a comedic take on the traditional Christmas song, which usually celebrates the holiday. However, in this song, Dr. Doofenshmirtz takes a different approach by reflecting on why he doesn’t hate Christmas. It’s a unique and funny song that demonstrates the character’s quirky and unconventional personality.
Line by Line Meaning
You see Valentines is torture
Valentine's Day is an excruciating experience
And my birthday is a mess!
My birthday is chaotic and troublesome
New Year's is a lot of noise
New Year's Day is deafeningly loud
And Arbor day's a pest!
Arbor Day is like a pest that irritates me
Halloween's a horror,
Halloween is an utter nightmare
But I guess I must confess
I suppose I should admit
That I really don't hate Christmas!
That I don't have a deep hatred for Christmas
You see Flag Day is infernal
Flag Day is like hellish torture
April Fool's is just a bore
April Fool's Day is dull and uninteresting
Mardi Grass a waste
Mardi Gras is worthless and unimportant
Unless you own a candy store
Except if you owned a candy store
All these other holidays
All these other celebrations
I can admit that I abhor,
I can confess that I despise them
But I really don't hate Christmas
But I don't have a true hatred for Christmas
Now it isn't that I like it,
Now don't get me wrong, I don't necessarily enjoy it
At the most I feel ambivalence!
At the very most I feel indifferent about it
But should I really just destroy it?
But should I really go ahead and sabotage it?
I'll admit that I'm still on the fence
I'll confess that I'm still undecided
It makes me tense!
It makes me anxious!
From the evil scientist community
From my peers in the evil scientific community
I'm sure to get ejected
I'm certain I'll be ousted
But for Christmas I can seem to summon
But for Christmas, I can't seem to find
Any true invective
Any real insult
Because what is there to hate?
Because honestly, what is there to detest?
I mean it's really so subjective!
I mean, it's all a matter of personal opinion!
Though I really don't hate Christmas
Although I don't have a passionate hatred for Christmas
I hate puppy dogs and kittens,
I even detest cute and cuddly things like puppies and kittens
I hate flowers in the Spring!
I can't stand the sight of flowers in full bloom during Springtime
I even hate the sunshine
I have a revulsion even for bright and sunny weather
And the birdies when they sing
Even the chirping of birds annoys me
I can work up animosity for almost anything
I can generate ill will towards nearly anything
Tell me why I don't hate Christmas
Explain why I don't have a loathing for Christmas
Though my childhood was atrocious,
Although my childhood was dreadful,
Christmas never was that bad, you see!
Christmas was never really that horrible, you know!
So the best that I can muster
So the most I can say
Is complete and total apathy
Is pure and complete indifference
What's wrong with me?
Is something wrong with me?
How can I prove that I'm
How can I demonstrate that I am
An evil villain worth his salt
An evildoer who is competent and effective
When with a holiday so jolly
When it comes to a holiday that is so joyous
I can't even find a fault?
I can't even discover a flaw?
If I didn't feel ambiguous
If I didn't feel doubtful
I'd launch a big assault!
I would proceed with a significant attack!
But I really don't hate Christmas!
But truly, I don't harbor any malice towards Christmas!
Ah what the heck? Kick line!
Oh, what the heck? Time for a kick line!
No I really
No, seriously,
No I really don't hate Christmas!
No, I genuinely don't have any hatred for Christmas!
Lyrics © O/B/O APRA AMCOS
Written by: JEFF SWAMPY MARSH, MARTIN OLSON, DAN POVENMIRE
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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on My Goody Two-Shoes Brother
my goody two shoes brother