Houston Bound
Elzadie Robinson Lyrics

I have this thing where I get older, but just never wiser
Despite aging, I don't seem to gain any additional wisdom.

Midnights become my afternoons
My nocturnal tendencies change my sense of time.

When my depression works the graveyard shift
My depression often manifests when I'm awake at night.

All of the people I’ve ghosted stand there in the room
The consequences of avoiding important relationships haunt me.

I should not be left to my own devices
I'm not good at making healthy choices independently.

They come with prices and vices
My habits have cost me emotional, physical, and financial burdens.

I end up in crises
I frequently find myself in difficult situations with no clear path forward.

Tale as old as time
This pattern of behavior is nothing new or unique.

I wake up screaming from dreaming
My subconscious is plagued by disturbing thoughts and dreams.

One day I'll watch as you’re leaving
I fear that my toxic behavior will eventually drive away those closest to me.

'Cause you got tired of my scheming
My manipulative and self-serving actions will eventually have consequences.

For the last time
I hope this destructive pattern will end soon.

It's me Hi! I’m the problem, it's me
I am the root cause of my own issues and struggles.

At teatime Everybody agrees
Even those closest to me acknowledge my problematic behavior.

I’ll stare directly at the sun, but never in the mirror
I'd rather blind myself with external distractions than confront my own reflection.

It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero
I can't keep living my life in conflict and opposition to everyone and everything around me.

Sometimes I feel like everybody is a sexy baby
I often see others as immature and incapable, despite a sexual appeal.

And I’m a monster on the hill
I feel isolated and monstrous.

Too big to hang out Slowly lurching toward your favorite city
I feel disconnected and unwelcome, even when near society and culture.

Pierced through the heart but never killed
I've been hurt before, but seem to be impervious to permanent change.

Did you hear my covert narcissism I disguise as altruism?
I often use selflessness as a way to feed my own ego and sense of superiority.

Like some kind of congressman Tale as old as time
Politicians and people like me have a history of corrupt, selfish behavior.

One day, I'll watch as you’re leaving
I worry that my loved ones will eventually tire of my poor behavior and abandon me.

And life will lose all its meaning For the last time
I'm scared of the consequences of my actions and thoughts.

I have this dream my daughter-in-law kills me for the money
I worry that my own greed and selfishness will eventually lead to my downfall.

She thinks I left them in the will The family gathers 'round and reads it
My loved ones will end up disappointed in me when they learn of my true nature.

And then someone screams out She’s laughing up at us from hell!
I'm fearful that my legacy will be one of mockery and scorn.

Everybody agrees
The people around me are aware of my issues and struggles.