There’s a scene in Dostoevsky’s Brothers Karamazov where the main characters Ivan and Alyosha discuss the existence of God. Ivan, in particular, questions the idea of God. Alyosha, on the other hand, is a monk, a believer, some may say, a holy fool.
Talk of faith and exalted things is rare in indie rock today. Enter Seattle band Ivan & Alyosha. Throughout their second release, the five song Fathers Be Kind EP, the band chart their own course between divinity and disbelief.
“I left my family and my home/to fight the battle on my own
I stole a car and drove away/but in my hate St. Paul did say
‘Glorify the Lord above/with your drink and making love
Glorify the Lord my son, with your whisky and your gun.”
Ivan & Alyosha began as the solo outlet for Tim Wilson but in spring 2007 the band formed after Tim met Ryan Carbary through a former band mate and mutual friend. Ryan and Tim began playing and recording together and a trip to Los Angeles to work with Eli Thompson (Richard Swift, Delta Spirit) spawned the name Ivan & Alyosha. According to Tim, Thompson is a huge Dostoevsky fan and the name stuck. With that, Wilson and Carbary released The Verse, The Chorus, their debut EP on Cheap Lullaby Records (Joan as Police Woman, The Silver Seas, Teitur). The stand out track “Easy To Love” earned NPR Song of the Day honors as “a propulsive, sweetly booming ode to love as a feat of endurance.”
The name Ivan & Alyosha is apt for a band cutting its teeth. As Ivan in Brothers Karamazov moves through the novel with doubts, Ivan & Alyosha navigate the indie rock world contemplating their path as a band. Tim says he writes songs about what’s current in his life. He recently married and had a son. Songs like “Living for Someone” and “Fathers Be Kind,” reflect Ivan & Alyosha grappling with the idea of being in a band and trying to fashion a career. Not only to follow their dreams but to earn a livelihood and support their families; a feeling he expresses in the former song, “Expecting our first child / Amid the great recession”. Despite the uncertainty, Ivan & Alyosha’s soulful folk tunes suggest a band inspired, hopeful and longing; a band unafraid to probe their collective faith and doubts.
Plus, things are different this time around. Tim and Ryan are joined by two others – Tim Kim and Pete Wilson, Tim’s brother. The band built a studio in a barn at Ryan’s parent’s house in Snohomish, 45 minutes outside of Seattle. Snohomish provides an idyllic setting with a charming main street lined by bars and little distraction. Self-recording their upcoming EP allows the guys more time together to create and perfect the new songs. Recently the band spent a week in New York playing gigs at 92Y Tribeca, Maxwell’s in Hoboken and Brooklyn’s Littlefield. They also took a trip to NPR Headquarters in Washington DC to record an NPR Tiny Desk Concert, and opened a run of shows for the Jayhawks’ Mark Olson.
In the Brothers Karamazov, when Ivan asks Alyosha to renounce his beliefs, Alyosha refuses. Rather, he kisses Ivan on the lips. Seattle’s Ivan & Alyosha are not nihilist indie rockers but a new brand of tender dreamers. And non-believers be damned! God, or no God - these guys are no holy fools. They have their music to prove it.
Don't Wanna Die Anymore
Ivan & Alyosha Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Realize that a man can't live like a saint
Open Your eyes
Just say your prayers and try not to cry
They hear your howl
See that your tears are suffering more
Brave as we are
Tellin' myself it ain't easy to go
Cryin' out loud that I don't wanna die
I'll be your eye
And know you see the reason why
they go so young, without mothers words that 'I love you son'
Her words in your head,
And a bit of luck may stop you feelin' dread
Brave as we are
Take one step forward to the hounds of hell!
Tellin' myself it ain't easy to go
Cryin' out loud that I don't wanna do so
They're staring at me and asking me why
Cryin' out loud that I don't wanna die
Will I ever feel that its done?
Who will warn me when to run?
Answer the call of the Lord
I need another chance cause I'm getting old
Tellin' myself it ain't easy to go
Cryin' out loud that I don't wanna do so
They're staring at me and asking me why
Cryin' out loud that I don't wanna die
The lyrics of Ivan & Alyosha's song "Don't Wanna Die Anymore" delve into the themes of struggle, fear of death, the importance of love and connection, and the longing for redemption. The song begins by acknowledging the human tendency to lie, admitting that living a virtuous life is extremely challenging. The singer urges the listener to open their eyes to the reality of life, while also encouraging prayer and the suppression of tears.
The second verse introduces the idea that others can understand the singer's pain and suffering. The howl, tears, and bravery are all signs of the internal struggles faced by individuals who feel trapped and oppressed by their circumstances. Despite this, they still bravely march forward, potentially towards their own personal hell.
The chorus repeats the sentiment of not wanting to die, emphasizing the desperation and anguish in the singer's voice. They express a willingness to support others, being an "eye" that sees the reasons for their struggles. The mention of young individuals dying without hearing their mother say "I love you" highlights the importance of love and emotional connection.
In the following lines, the singer imagines the words of a mother echoing in their head, providing some solace and hope. They recognize that a bit of luck and bravery may mitigate the fear and dread they feel. However, they are still compelled to take another step towards their own personal hell, suggesting a perpetual struggle against their own demons.
The second chorus reiterates the singer's aversion to death, as they are confronted by others who question and judge their desires. The repetition of crying out loud serves to emphasize the desperation and urgency in their plea to not die.
In the final verse, the singer questions if they will ever find closure, unsure of what will signal the end of their struggles. They long for someone to guide them and warn them when it's time to escape from their personal hell. They express a desire for another chance as they face the reality of growing old.
The song's conclusion once again emphasizes the internal conflict and desperation of the singer in not wanting to die. They continue to cry out loud and affirm their aversion to death, longing for redemption and another opportunity to fulfill their desires and find peace.
Overall, "Don't Wanna Die Anymore" explores the complexities of human existence, the struggle against one's own demons, the importance of love and emotional connection, and the desperate longing for another chance at life. It speaks to the universal fear of death and the need for redemption, resonating with those who have faced their own inner battles.
Line by Line Meaning
You know when I lie
I am aware of my own dishonesty
Realize that a man can't live like a saint
Acknowledge that it is impossible for a man to constantly be morally perfect
Open Your eyes
Be aware of the truth that surrounds you
Just say your prayers and try not to cry
Seek solace in prayer and attempt to hold back tears
They hear your howl
Others are aware of your pain and suffering
See that your tears are suffering more
Recognize that your tears only add to your own suffering
Brave as we are
Despite our fears and challenges, we remain courageous
One step forward to the hounds of hell!
Moving closer to our own internal struggles and demons
Tellin' myself it ain't easy to go
Reminding myself that it is difficult to face mortality
Cryin' out loud that I don't wanna die
Expressing a strong desire to cling onto life
I'll be your eye
I will serve as your guide and perspective
And know you see the reason why
I understand the rationale behind your actions
They go so young, without mother's words that 'I love you son'
Young individuals pass away without receiving their mother's loving words
Her words in your head
Her comforting words linger in your thoughts
And a bit of luck may stop you feelin' dread
Fortunate circumstances can alleviate your sense of fear and anxiety
Take one step forward to the hounds of hell!
Continue facing personal demons and challenges head-on
They're staring at me and asking me why
Others scrutinize me and inquire about my motivations
Will I ever feel that it's done?
Will I ever find a sense of completion or resolution?
Who will warn me when to run?
Who will provide guidance and advice on when to flee or escape?
Answer the call of the Lord
Respond to the divine's invitation or command
I need another chance cause I'm getting old
Desire for an opportunity to start anew due to advancing age
Lyrics © TUNECORE INC
Written by: Balla Máté, Beke István, Simon Bálint, Tarnai János, Vitáris Iván
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind