This Is...
J. Louis & Ferran Vs. Taiko Tikaro Lyrics


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I’m not signed to a record label
So when I releases music I become unstable
Things that I say people gotta bring me to the conference table
People gotta have a talk with me cause the apple didn’t fall far from tree
I know I have an issue with anger
Barring down on me so hard like an anchor
That’s why I put this music out
Lock me away and put me in the chamber
Writing everything in my head on paper
Failure is not an option I gotta become greater
Gotta watch what I write or it will come back and haunt me later
Deep dark thoughts run thru my head
Just wanna lay down and go to bed
But that doesn’t help so where can I turn too
Through all the shit I’ve been thru only a few know
Screw it tell the world
I’m sick and tired of bullshit
I’m tired of all the hypocrites
I’m really sick and tired of people askin me if I’m okay
Keeping my thoughts locked on tight don’t want them to come to the light
But they try to bust out but I fight it
Doing everything in my power with all my might
I miss her all right
Yesterday threw me in a whril
We celebrated like we didn’t have a care in the world
No cakes, no ballons, no gifts, no I’m sorry for your loss will ever make it better I’m tired of it all
I’ll say it one time you keep asking me imma just throw you thru the wall
No more nice act it’s time you fuckers get your shit cracked
Got the 410 ready and racked that’s a fact
Really I’m hurting deep down inside and no one sees
These thoughts got me filled up like the sea
And never thought this is what it would be
But I guess I cashed out and paid the fee
I left and didn’t grab the key why me
Everyone looks to me to be almighty
Dying inside and it’s sucks I’m tryin to tell you nicely but don’t take it lightly
Most times I sit in silence that what frightens me
The thing that’s killing me I can not see
Using this music instead of the tissue
My proof is in the sales and streams
A dangerous thing to give me a platform to yell and i scream
Saying I’m just trying to make this come true
And you people have no idea what I’ve gone thru
Dealing with this pain on my shoulders
Got these wounds from these giant boulders
My life just seems like it’s on a wild rollercoaster
Fuck what these other people think
No you’re not crazy you don’t need a shrink
People really need to take a step back and think
What they say about someone’s art because that person poured their heart into that art
Start understanding we all don’t seek for help
We push ourselves to seek more wealth
At the same time everyone beats you up
Says you’ll be nothin
But you really can’t do anything the cards are delt
Half these individuals don’t understand I’m doing this to keep me sane
Can’t be mad and I’m not placing any blame
I guess shit will never be the same
The word the everyone wants to claim
Being famous is a goal and not where i got my aim
Seems like I got the crosshairs right on my brain
Gotta sit back smoke on my Mary Jane
Packed my bags up hoppin on this train
My goal is to get away from this pain
I fight my urges to escape
Look around and I see a shadow of a gun shape
Picked it up can’t let it go cause its held on by tape
I put it to my head and blow my brains out




No one had any idea that’s what I was about
Just know I didn’t have any doubts

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of J. Louis & Ferran Vs. Taiko Tikaro's "This is..." delve into the emotional turmoil of an independent artist who has not been signed by a record label. He struggles with anger and depression, and puts all his thoughts and emotions into his music, using it as a platform to express himself. The artist acknowledges that he has issues with anger and that people around him must deal with him with tact, as his thoughts might come back to pester him. He writes everything on paper, and throughout the song, we see his struggles with depression, his grief over a loss, his frustration with people asking him if he's okay, his self-doubt, and his urge to escape from his pain.


The artist is aware of how some people view him and his art, and he feels like everyone wants to claim the word "famous." He acknowledges that he has not been dealt the best set of cards in life, but he is still pushing himself to seek more wealth. However, at the same time, he has to deal with people's negativity, who try to bring him down.


The lyrics of the song are very poignant and reflect the challenges faced by independent artists. The artist portrays his struggles with anger and depression and how he channels them into his music, providing a glimpse into the life of independent musicians trying to make it in the industry.


Line by Line Meaning

I’m not signed to a record label
I don't have the resources or support of a major record company


So when I releases music I become unstable
Releasing my music puts me in a vulnerable position


Things that I say people gotta bring me to the conference table
People want to confront me about the things I say


People gotta have a talk with me cause the apple didn’t fall far from tree
My behavior is influenced by my upbringing


I know I have an issue with anger
I struggle with managing my anger


Barring down on me so hard like an anchor
My anger weighs me down like an anchor


That’s why I put this music out
I use music as a way to cope with my emotions


Lock me away and put me in the chamber
Music is my escape


Writing everything in my head on paper
I express my thoughts through writing lyrics


Failure is not an option I gotta become greater
I am driven to succeed and won't accept failure


Gotta watch what I write or it will come back and haunt me later
I am aware that my lyrics have consequences


Deep dark thoughts run thru my head
I have thoughts that are troubling and difficult to manage


Just wanna lay down and go to bed
At times, I feel overwhelmed and want to shut down


But that doesn’t help so where can I turn too
I realize that avoiding my problems won't solve them


Through all the shit I’ve been thru only a few know
Only a select few know the extent of my struggles


Screw it tell the world
At this point, I feel compelled to share my story with others


I’m sick and tired of bullshit
I am fed up with insincerity and dishonesty


I’m tired of all the hypocrites
I am weary of those who act one way but behave differently


I’m really sick and tired of people askin me if I’m okay
I am annoyed by people's constant inquiries about my well-being


Keeping my thoughts locked on tight don’t want them to come to the light
I fear the repercussions of sharing my deepest thoughts and emotions


But they try to bust out but I fight it
I struggle with a desire to express myself and the fear of being vulnerable


Doing everything in my power with all my might
I am determined to succeed despite my challenges


I miss her all right
I am longing for someone I care about


Yesterday threw me in a whirl
Recent events have left me feeling disoriented and upset


We celebrated like we didn’t have a care in the world
Despite the challenges, we chose to celebrate and enjoy life


No cakes, no balloons, no gifts, no I’m sorry for your loss will ever make it better I’m tired of it all
No material possessions or apologies can ease the pain I feel


I’ll say it one time you keep asking me imma just throw you thru the wall
I will become more aggressive if people continue to ask me if I'm okay


No more nice act it’s time you fuckers get your shit cracked
I am no longer willing to tolerate disrespectful behavior


Got the 410 ready and racked that’s a fact
I am prepared to defend myself if necessary


Really I’m hurting deep down inside and no one sees
I am struggling internally even though it's not apparent to others


These thoughts got me filled up like the sea
My thoughts and emotions are overwhelming me like the tide of the sea


And never thought this is what it would be
I did not anticipate that my life would turn out like this


But I guess I cashed out and paid the fee
I have experienced the repercussions of my choices


I left and didn’t grab the key why me
I question why things turned out the way they did


Everyone looks to me to be almighty
I feel the pressure to be strong and invincible


Dying inside and it’s sucks I’m trying to tell you nicely but don’t take it lightly
I am struggling internally and want to convey that message without seeming confrontational


Most times I sit in silence that what frightens me
I fear that my tendency to isolate myself is detrimental


The thing that’s killing me I can not see
I am struggling with an internal battle that I cannot fully understand


Using this music instead of the tissue
I use music as a way to cope with emotional pain


My proof is in the sales and streams
My success as a musician is a testament to the power of music as a coping mechanism


A dangerous thing to give me a platform to yell and i scream
My platform as a musician comes with a risk of me expressing my inner turmoil aggressively


Saying I’m just trying to make this come true
I am pursuing my dreams through music


And you people have no idea what I’ve gone thru
Most people do not understand the challenges I have faced


Dealing with this pain on my shoulders
I am carrying a heavy emotional burden


Got these wounds from these giant boulders
My emotional scars are the result of significant struggles and challenges


My life just seems like it’s on a wild rollercoaster
My life feels like a chaotic and unpredictable ride


Fuck what these other people think
I am not concerned with how others perceive me


No you’re not crazy you don’t need a shrink
I am not crazy or in need of psychiatric help


People really need to take a step back and think
Others should be more thoughtful and considerate in their interactions


What they say about someone’s art because that person poured their heart into that art
People should be more respectful of artists because their work is often deeply personal


Start understanding we all don’t seek for help
Not everyone is open to seeking assistance when they are struggling


We push ourselves to seek more wealth
Many people are motivated by the pursuit of financial success


At the same time everyone beats you up
It feels like others are trying to bring me down


Says you’ll be nothin
Some people doubt my ability to succeed


But you really can’t do anything the cards are delt
I recognize that my circumstances are beyond my control


Half these individuals don’t understand I’m doing this to keep me sane
Many people do not understand that music is my way of coping with emotional struggles


Can’t be mad and I’m not placing any blame
I am not angry and do not blame others for my struggles


I guess shit will never be the same
I am uncertain if things will improve


The word the everyone wants to claim
Many people desire fame and the recognition that comes with it


Being famous is a goal and not where I got my aim
While others may strive for fame, it was not my primary goal in pursuing music


Seems like I got the crosshairs right on my brain
I feel like I am being targeted and scrutinized


Gotta sit back smoke on my Mary Jane
I use marijuana as a way to relax and cope with stress


Packed my bags up hoppin on this train
I am leaving my current situation and starting anew


My goal is to get away from this pain
My objective is to escape the emotional pain I am experiencing


I fight my urges to escape
I struggle with feeling the need to run away from my problems


Look around and I see a shadow of a gun shape
I feel like my struggles are leading me towards self-harm


Picked it up can’t let it go cause its held on by tape
I am unable to let go of my destructive tendencies


I put it to my head and blow my brains out
I am consumed by thoughts of suicide


No one had any idea that’s what I was about
My struggles and pain are not apparent to others


Just know I didn’t have any doubts
I am resolute in my decision to take my own life




Lyrics © DistroKid
Written by: Justin Craigen

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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