Sober
P!nk愀 Lyrics

I don't wanna be the girl who laughs the loudest
I don't want to fake my happiness and appear too eager to please others.

Or the girl who never wants to be alone
I don't want to depend on others for my happiness and avoid being by myself.

I don't wanna be there calling 4 o'clock in the morning
I don't want to be someone's last resort and the only person they turn to in their time of need.

Cause I'm the only one you know in the world that won't be home
I don't want to be stuck in a toxic relationship where I'm the only one making an effort and the other person takes me for granted.

Ah, the sun is blinding
The harsh reality is becoming too difficult to ignore.

I stayed up again
I'm avoiding sleep because I'm afraid of facing my problems.

Oh, I am finding
I'm starting to realize.

That that's not the way I want my story to end
I don't want to keep living my life this way and want to make a change.

I'm safe
I'm in a comfortable place.

Up high
I'm in a position of power and control.

Nothing can touch me
I'm invincible and untouchable.

But why do I feel this party's over?
Why do I feel like this good fortune won't last and something bad will happen?

No pain
I'm not hurting emotionally.

Inside
Internally, I am at peace.

You're my protection
You make me feel safe and secure.

But how do I feel this good sober?
How am I able to feel this good without the use of drugs or alcohol?

I don't wanna be the girl that has to fill the silence
I don't want the burden of keeping a conversation going and feel uncomfortable during moments of silence.

The quiet scares me 'cause it screams the truth
Silence makes me anxious because it forces me to confront the truth that I'm trying to avoid.

Please don't tell me that we had that conversation
I don't want to be reminded of a difficult conversation we had in the past.

Cause I won't remember, save your breath, 'cause what's the use?
I won't remember anything you say, so there's no point in bringing it up again.

Ah, the night is calling?
I'm being pulled towards destructive behavior and I'm struggling to resist.

And it whispers to me softly come and play
The thought of acting recklessly and engaging in dangerous activities is like a seductive whisper in my ear.

But I, I am falling
I'm losing control and giving in to the temptation.

And If I let myself go I'm the only one to blame
If I give in, I know it will lead to negative consequences and it will be my fault for not being strong enough.

Coming down, coming down, coming down
I'm slowly descending into a state of despair and self-destruction.

Spinning 'round, spinning 'round, spinning 'round
My thoughts are racing and I feel dizzy from the chaos in my mind.

I'm looking for myself, sober
I'm trying to find my true, authentic self without relying on external substances or distractions.

When it's good, then it's good, it's so good 'till it goes bad
When things are going well, it feels amazing, but it often doesn't last and I end up feeling worse than before.

'Till you're trying to find the you that you once had
When things fall apart, I feel lost and disconnected from who I used to be.

I have heard myself cry, never again
I've experienced so much pain and heartache that I don't want to let it happen again.

Broken down in agony just tryin' to find a friend
I've hit rock bottom and I'm desperate for someone to support me and be there for me.