In 1995, songwriter/producer and representative for Atlantic Records Matt Serletic approached the members of Tabitha's Secret concerning a long-term record deal. However, Serletic was more interested in helping Thomas find his voice than he was in the band Tabitha's Secret. Jay Stanley and John Goff were uninterested in a long-term record deal, believing it was better to sign for a one-record deal and evaluate the situation following this record's release. Thomas, however, felt the band should take the offer.
The fact that Stanley and Goff were resistant to sign, alongside pressure from the record company to drop the two guitar players, Thomas, Yale, and Doucette decided it was best to part ways with the other members of the band. Splitting the band landed Thomas, Yale, and Doucette a two-record deal with Atlantic Records, which was later renewed. With their two guitar players gone, Atlantic introduced the trio to Adam Gaynor, a rhythm guitarist and Kyle Cook, a lead guitarist. The five now comprise Matchbox Twenty, a world-renowned band.
When Matchbox Twenty debuted its first album Yourself or Someone Like You, Jay Stanley sued for royalties, claiming he owned the rights to the song 3am which appeared on the newly released record. Stanley stated that he was paid for the original recording sessions of the song when it was performed by Tabitha's Secret (it's released on multiple albums by Tabitha's Secret). This lawsuit lasted five years and was settled in 2000.
Although the band never released any records while they were together, Jay Stanley released three albums after getting the rights to the recordings of Tabitha's Secret. He released a rough demo mix, "Don't Play With Matches" in 1998, to satisfy the hard-core fans and the "Live" record in 2000. Later, Stanley joined with Tony Miceli and engineer George Spatta to re-mix, re-master, and overdub the original recordings and put them into the album "Tabitha's Secret?" which was released in late 2001.
Dear Joan
Tabitha's Secret Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
The pane in the window, the blue dress in the doorway
Dear Joan, help me remember
The face I forget, and the traps that I've sprung
I guess I've grown tired, It's just what's expected of me
To tear your heart, from the inside to the outside
You know I was wired, I just couldn't help it
Dear Joan I wanted to say, I'm sorry for the screaming last night, and the nights before
I've wanted more from this than anything I've ever known, Dear Joan
Dear Joan, your face has a brightness
That I've never seen, in the years that I've known you
Dear Joan, I'd pick up the pieces
But some scattered too far, they flew when I kicked them
I know you believed when I said it was over
You stood by me patiently, waiting and brooding
So deeply in love, with every face that I've shown
Dear Joan I wanted to say, I'm sorry for the screaming last night, and the nights before
I've wanted more from this than anything I've ever known, Dear Joan
Once I forget, twice I'm a fool
Three times I wrap my hands around your neck
While your sleeping
So quietly sleeping
Sleeping and dreaming
Dear Joan, don't walk out the doorway
Because if you did, I believe I could honestly kill you
Dear Joan I wanted to say, I'm sorry for the screaming last night, and the nights before
I've wanted more from this than anything I've ever known, Dear Joan
Dear Joan I wanted to say, I'm sorry for the screaming last night, and the nights before
I've wanted more from this than anything I've ever known, Dear Joan
"Dear Joan" is a song by the band Tabitha's Secret. The lyrics describe a man's struggle with his own internal demons and how he has mistreated and hurt the woman named Joan who has been by his side throughout it all. The song's opening line, "Dear Joan, I've almost forgotten," sets the tone for the rest of the song as the singer acknowledges his shortcomings and expresses regret for his actions.
Throughout the song, the singer expresses a sense of detachment and apathy towards his own behavior, yet he is aware of the pain he has caused Joan. He admits that he is growing tired of the cycle of hurting and being hurt, yet he seems trapped in his own pattern of behavior. In the final lines of the song, he begs Joan not to leave him, even though he acknowledges that he might hurt her again. The line "Because if you did, I believe I could honestly kill you" is particularly chilling and underscores the seriousness of the situation.
Line by Line Meaning
Dear Joan, I've almost forgotten
I'm losing touch with the memories of us.
The pane in the window, the blue dress in the doorway
Those small details that used to spark my memory of you are slipping away.
Dear Joan, help me remember
Please remind me of the good times and refresh my memories of us.
The face I forget, and the traps that I've sprung
I need you to bring back the image of your face and remind me of the mistakes I made in our relationship.
I guess I've grown tired, It's just what's expected of me
I'm expected to be unfaithful and hurt you, and it's now a habit for me.
To tear your heart, from the inside to the outside
I know that my actions have hurt you deeply.
You know I was wired, I just couldn't help it
It's not an excuse, but I had a strong impulse to hurt you.
The hundred thousand times I hurt you
I'm aware of how many times I've caused you pain.
Dear Joan I wanted to say, I'm sorry for the screaming last night, and the nights before
I wish I could apologize for my behavior towards you.
I've wanted more from this than anything I've ever known, Dear Joan
I had high hopes for our relationship, but it always ended up in disappointment.
Dear Joan, your face has a brightness
I can see the joy in your face despite all of the pain that I have caused you.
That I've never seen, in the years that I've known you
You still have so much light to offer, despite how long we've been together.
Dear Joan, I'd pick up the pieces
I want to be the one to put our relationship back together.
But some scattered too far, they flew when I kicked them
I know I contributed to the mess our relationship is in and some pieces are lost forever.
I know you believed when I said it was over
I've ended things between us multiple times but still come back to you.
You stood by me patiently, waiting and brooding
You've shown great patience, even though I've hurt you so much.
So deeply in love, with every face that I've shown
You've accepted and loved every version of me, even though I don't deserve it.
Once I forget, twice I'm a fool
I should have learned my lesson from my past mistakes.
Three times I wrap my hands around your neck
I'm afraid that if I continue to hurt you, it may escalate to physical violence.
While your sleeping, so quietly sleeping, Sleeping and dreaming
I can't help but feel guilty for hurting you while you are sleeping and vulnerable.
Dear Joan, don't walk out the doorway
I'm scared of losing you.
Because if you did, I believe I could honestly kill you
I'm so consumed by my own mistakes that I'm afraid I could hurt you even more if you leave me.
Dear Joan I wanted to say, I'm sorry for the screaming last night, and the nights before
Once again, I am deeply remorseful for my actions and I wish I could take them back.
I've wanted more from this than anything I've ever known, Dear Joan
Despite all my failures and mistakes, I still love you and want this relationship to work.
Lyrics © TABITHA'S SECRET MUSIC INC.
Written by: BRIAN YALE, JOHN GOFF, JOHN JOSEPH STANLEY, ROB THOMAS, ROBERT THOMAS
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
@elycelisio7635
Dear Joan, I've almost forgotten the pane in the window
The blue dress in the doorway
Dear Joan, help me remember the face I forget
And the traps that I've sprung
I guess I've grown tired, it's just what's expected of me
To tear your heart from the inside to the outside
You know I was wired, I just couldn't help it
The hundred thousand times I hurt you
Dear Joan, I wanted to say
I'm sorry for the screaming last night and the nights before
Well, I've wanted more from this
Than anything I've even known, dear Joan
Dear Joan, your face has a brightness
That I've never seen in the years that I've known you
Dear Joan, I'd pick up the pieces but some scattered too far
You see they flew when I kicked them, cross the floor
And I know you believe when I said it was over
You stood by me patiently waiting and broken
So deeply in love with every face that I've shown
And Dear Joan I wanted to say
I'm sorry for the screaming last night and the nights before
Well I've wanted more from this
Than anything I've ever known
Once I forget, twice I'm a fool, three times
I wrap my hands around your neck while you're sleepin'
Dear Joan, don't walk out the doorway
Because if you did, I could honestly kill you
Dear Joan, I wanted to say
I'm sorry for the screaming last night and the nights before
Well I've wanted more from this
Than anything I've ever known
Dear Joan, I wanted to say
I'm sorry for the screaming last night and the nights before
Well I've wanted more from this
Than anything I've ever known, dear Joan
@moonbeam606
rob thomas wow what a voice. my husband of 23 yrs took me to my very first concert, i recently lost that love of my life. these songs all will forever remind me of john. this ones for you darling. true love always. love ms cathrine
@chihauhaun
Haunting. I got to see Rob Thomas live and he just has so much emotion when he sings.
@mountaindewslave
he really does; sounds almost better in person than on record and that's rare to find :O
@wandoriver87
Saw him at the Visage in Orlando. Winter park. Hard Rock in Orlando after they got signed.
@tigerleonsaintaubin2736
a true musical singer songwriter good human being if there ever was one...
years of magic from him and both of his bands...now and old......
on top live form....he's unmatchable.......a true human.......🚀
@alicianicole4693
One of my all time favorites by Rob Thomas <3
@carlalecroy6594
I love this song. Love Rob Thomas ❤
@ApplebloomMLP
I was so angry just now, I felt like I could actually strangle the one I loved most, but I decided instead to listen to this song to call me down. I'm so glad this song exists, otherwise I might have hurt her emotionally and physically.
@tlmh715
Back in Rockafellas days in SC. Damn, Rob, I miss those days! ;)
@amberjansen239
They began as a local band called Tabitha's Secret, and titled one of their albums Don't Play With Matches.Then swapped out the guitar and bass players, and became Matchbox 20. Kinda awesome, really...