Two Minutes to Late Night is a metal themed talk-show & podcast formed by J… Read Full Bio ↴Two Minutes to Late Night is a metal themed talk-show & podcast formed by Jordan "Gwarsenio Hall" Olds and Drew "Kevin the Sound Guy" Kaufmann. The show acts as a parody of late night talk shows with recurring sketches, interviews and musical performances from bands across the metal and hardcore spectrum. Frequent musical collaborators with the group include members of Mutoid Man, War on Women, Chelsea Wolfe, Mastodon, and Old Man Gloom amongst others.

Ass Boys
Two Minutes to Late Night Lyrics

We were born with em
We did not chose em
We won’t shove em
We will not pick ‘em

Thank you Danhausen
Who were we foolin’?
No double dealin’
we are not swearin’

So many asses
On the family tree
We can prove with a 23 and me

Our grandpa changed it
At Ellis island
It used to be Hindquarters
Now we’re just ass boys

Yes we’re the ass boys
We’re not your boy toys
One day we’ll be assmen
Still won’t be swearin’

Our name is Ass
We are set free
There’s enough to go around for you and you and me

It’s out last name
You can’t swear when you’re on tv
It’s a real last name
Technically it’s not swearing because

Lyrics © O/B/O APRA AMCOS

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind

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Most interesting comment from YouTube:

J Alex

2y↑116

We're the Ass Boys, Billy Ass and the Ass Boys
We're the Ass Boys, Billy Ass and the Ass Boys

It's our last name, we were born with it, we did not choose it,
We won't shove 'em, we will not pick 'em
Thank you Danhausen, who were we fooling?
No double-dealing, we are not swearing
So many asses, one family tree
We can prove it with the 23 and Me

We're the Ass Boys, Billy Ass and the Ass Boys
We're the Ass Boys, Billy Ass and the Ass Boys

We're not swearing
Our Grandpa changed it at Ellis Island
"It used to be Hindquarters," now we're just Ass Boys
We are the Ass Boys, We're not your boy toys
One day we'll be Ass Men, still won't be swearing
Our name is Ass, we are set free
There's enough to go around for you, and you, and me

We're the Ass Boys, Billy Ass and the Ass Boys
We're the Ass Boys, Billy Ass and the Ass Boys
It's our last name!

It's our last name, you can't swear when you're on TV
It's a real last name, technically it's not swearing because...

We're the Ass Boys, Billy Ass and the Ass Boys
We're the Ass Boys, Billy Ass and the Ass Boys
It's their last name!

All comments from YouTube:

Two Minutes To Late Night

2y↑47

Oh wow you can now buy the Ass Boys Theme Song on Bandcamp: https://twominutestolatenight.bandcamp.com/track/ass-boys-theme-song

Stumme-40203

2y↑8

I lost my shit when this played at the forbidden door buy-in.

Slavitt4

2y↑247

THIS MADE IT TO FORBIDDEN DOOR! THAT’S AMAZING! Instant pop from me

Broski Jandel

2y↑2

Same here too! Best pre-PPV segment for me :D

ModestlyAmazing

2y↑2

Best part of the night 😂

Christopher Doroba

2y↑2

Same!

Robby Gallipeau

2y↑7

Same here dude! Was hoping that Mr. Hall was gonna come out

streetmagik

2y↑631

I hope Rod and Todd Ass appreciate everything you and Danhausen have done for them!

Spazcakes

@Speaking Moistly Hello, Joe!

emperorgrey

2y↑13

Rod & Todd Hindquarters...someone needs to bring that sign to a show

Speaking Moistly

2y↑22

Iron helps them play

Ryan Berry Film

2y↑497

They better use this on A&W!! A crowd singing along to this would be legendary

Jermaine Clyde Mallari

2y↑2

your prediction is correct watch forbidden door buy in

Jose Lopez

2y↑4

You just got your wish

tpuccia88

2y↑2

Well it's official now!

Kristina

2y↑7

Hi there! I’m from the future and they’ll use it at this thing called Forbidden Door.

REVEREND~§ATAN

2y↑9

They just did at forbidden door

9 More Replies...

ChristovonHool

2y↑543

If this song isnt used in an AEW feud between the Ass boys and Danhausen, that would be criminal. Such a great theme song!

D.Beat.Cooper

2y↑2

IT HAPPENED!!

MarcSola7

2y↑6

Your wish has been fulfilled at the Forbidden Door Buy-In.

Shai Niz

2y↑7

Forbidden Door has fulfilled our wishes!

Kevin Malkinski

2y↑4

It's happening

Dylan Shahan

2y↑5

It happened my brother

6 More Replies...

Harrison Hess

2y↑133

It’s official:

Danhausen is the greatest thing to ever happen to wrestling.

Daniel Britts

2y↑280

Rod and Todd are going to have an absolute banger to jam out to at the Ass Ranch

Baby King tellem

2y↑2

Lol 😂

Daniel Britts

2y↑11

I'd also just like to point out Danhausen doing the Macarena. Amazing.

1 More Replies...

Plan_R

2y↑280

Danhausen is so magnanimous, writing a banger of a song for Billy Ass and the Ass Boys to use as their entrance music. I hope they are properly grateful to Danhausen for this.

Vyn Ashe

2y↑4

I guarantee Billy Ass fucking loves this song.

A$AP-BUBBY

He's helping them get more monies for their sacks

richard c

2y↑1

I think you will find that magnanimoushausen

richard c

2y↑3

I think you will find that magnanimoushausen

Time Baby

2y↑113

The fact that the Assboys theme is butt rock is absolute genius.

pillboss1987

2y↑137

Damnithousen, now I’m gonna have “We’re The Ass Boys, Billy Ass and The Ass Boys” stuck in my head for the rest of forever.

DSM The Editor

2y↑4

NO SWEARING

Paul Thompson

2y↑4

I caught myself singing it in a shop I was getting some funny looks I'm 44, love that Danhausen

コートニーCourtney

2y↑8

No swearing!

speedtek

2y↑280

I was at the AEW show this week in Cleveland and everyone went absolutely NUTS when Adam Cole pulled Danhausen out from under the ring

Gene Anthony

2y↑2

I just found out about Danhausen about a month earlier but I was expecting him to debut as soon as possible. Guy was way too talented and also had come up on the radar of the Rock, Punk, Cody Rhodes, Renee Depree, Connan O Brian, and a ton of other guys. Even Tony Khan was asked about him in an interview. Guy made the Ass Boys more relevant to where even Billy Gunn said how much he helped them. He just got released from ROH and had a broken leg. Figured at soon as it healed he was coming in.

Paul

2y↑2

I was there to and on tv did it not justice the pop he got

Random Stoner Nerd

2y↑1

I was there too what a great show

Ray Smith

2y↑12

@Simon Homewood honestly I don't remember the lights ever going out until the lights out match to which it literally flickered not even 1 second. 1 dude checked under the ring in a Hoodie but came right back out from under the ring. Knowing Danhausen he hide under their the whole show

Simon Homewood

2y↑2

Did you see him hide under there before the reveal?

3 More Replies...

Instabrawl

2y↑41

Such deep and meaningful lyrics. This song has helped me through a really dark time in my life.

Your dashing hero+idol

2y↑3

Brother, my journey has led me down the dark path here to the light too! I sat, gazing out of the window at the rain, just really LISTENING to what the music was telling me to do. It's like I finally woke up from a nightmare and have perfect clarity and peace in my heart and soul for the first time since it all started ...on the outskirts of Albuquerque that very evil summer night....not an ass to behold. Not even when scrounging under the bleachers. Never again damn it!

1 More Replies...

Johnny Cage

2y↑115

Danhausen wants the AEW crowd to sing this one along too. Danhausen is for the people.

Veronica Southern

2y↑1

The music of Danhausen, it's all about the Ass Boys mannnn!

コートニーCourtney

2y↑2

@Johnny Cage You're absolutely right. I also don't wanna be cursed.

Johnny Cage

2y↑4

@コートニーCourtney You better! You wouldn't want to be the only person NOT knowing them 😄

JackgarPrime

2y↑14

Old Busted: Judas
New Hotness: Ass Boys

コートニーCourtney

2y↑5

Does this mean we should all start learning the words?

Robby Gallipeau

2y↑18

This song has been stuck in my head since yesterday

Ricardo C Joulzenn

2y↑2

Been for over a month

June Thomas Moldes

2y↑16

"We are the Ass Boys, we're not your Boy Toys" underrated line right there

Aaron Smith

2y↑1

Nice HBK referencehausen.

Sendrius Telt

2y↑53

They played it! They played it!!!!!!

endefisto123

2y↑1

Considering they supposedly split with the acclaimed they might.

stimpy4200

2y↑1

Hellyeahausen

Benjamin Held

2y↑7

It just has to be their theme at this point. Embrace the assness for crying out loud.

Luke Higgins

2y↑19

so stoked to see this debut on Forbidden Door 😅

Jonathan A

2y↑86

This is GOLD, who wouldn’t want to come out to this with Billy Ass?!?!?

J Alex

2y↑116

J Alex

2y↑2

@Paul Heyman Right you are, corrected!

Paul Heyman

2y↑12

The lyric is "our grandpa changed it at Ellis Island"

Raft

2y↑7

Danhausen, Golden Globe songwriter

LilLuna86

2y↑64

If I was the Gunn club I would lean into this to get over. Huge epic face turn, use this as my entrance music, crowds already chanting ass boys. It's a blessing in disguise.

A N

I guarantee they l laughed as hard as you did!! I know daddy Ass loved it!!

Your dashing hero+idol

2y↑5

I completely agree! They could seriously be a youth movement as a face team, grudgingly taking on the moniker after some resistance. Then embracing it and going full tilt in honor of their Dad! Actually following directly in his footsteps! Billy was an athlete above all and known as a pretty tough dude.....but he didn't get over untill he became the "Badass" ......and then hit his peak as " Mr. Ass"!
His sons are on the same course, with his mentoring. They went on that deep deep trios undefeated streak as no nonsense athletes and "Young Gunns"(how hasn't this been their tag team name, when Billy sits out?) They played the cocky heels w/Austin the weasely instigator! They have done a pretty decent job....but honestly,nobody cares all that much. They are a real take em' or leave em' type of act at this point. IMO, not their fault. The fault lies in their booking. They have been gifted this long winning streak, but nobody really notices because it is on the minor shows vs name jobbers usually. And they are still pretty green and a bit sloppy at times. No more than alot of the roster and they are improving at a good pace. The thing is, you can't have entitled and arrogant heels that aren't at a level yet where it makes sense. Mr.Perfect....Christian can pull that role off. Or even Rene Dupree who was only 19 when he debuted. But he was a super rare specimen. However......the face team of the "Ass boys" could make those minor mistakes and it wouldn't matter. They could rely on their personalities to help get them over. Austin is ready to be a mouthpiece and they can be an athletic comedy act that people would legit rally behind. They would certainly slot as a reliable, versatile young act that can be used anywhere. Like a name brand "Varsity blondes" that would book more wins. This song is the glue.Crazy!

emperorgrey

2y↑5

Blessing and curse for them...they now get a huge crowd reaction making the chants and might get more tv time, but will have people calling them ass boys for the remainder of their careers no matter what they accomplish. I think it's hilarious

Alskie

2y↑9

Really can't believe they played this. If they come out to this song it will be amazing!

backlit

2y↑73

My three favorite things in the world all coming together: Danhausen, Two Minutes to Late Night, and Ass. Thank you for this glorious moment that the world will never forget.

Chris Van Vliet

2y↑131

This is fantastic! 😂

g-spot t.v

2y↑1

Fucking stupidly great

Brian Harley

2y↑2

@Ricardo C Joulzenn forbidden door cracked me up lol

Steven Ward

2y↑3

I legit popped.........And Hi Chris.....Hope all is well with you

Shai Niz

2y↑7

@Ricardo C Joulzenn Forbidden Door has fulfilled our wishes!

Ricardo C Joulzenn

2y↑5

You finally found it lol...you should be on it and pull for Tony to use it for Acclaimed Theme song ..i know Billy already heard it😂😂😂😂

Brian Shoemaker

2y↑24

Can we get a 10 hour loop of Danhausen doing those sweet dance moves???? Very funky. Very awkward.

Allen L

Very Danhausen.

Matthew

Lmao

Smashvillain

2y↑27

"we wrote a sequel to the greatest wrestling theme ever"

And in the process, surpassed it.

Chris Walsh

2y↑2

It surpassed it but it’s defs an a propos sequel

MarcSola7

2y↑13

Who came here after the Forbidden Door PPV? Danhausen has finally used this song on the buy-in and the reaction is what you expected from The ~~Gunn~~ Assboys Club.

OfDice&Men

2y↑46

This was so much better than it had any right to be. Danhaussen should totally make this play next time Billy and his boys are on Dark or Elevation.

Sennerbeast

2y↑3

Even better it made it to forbidden door

Tony Jackson

2y↑5

The Attitude vibe of this is great, and the lyrics are 🔥.

Peter Nelson

2y↑34

This is a bangerhausen. Forget the crowd singing Judas, the crowd singing this is what needs to happen in 2022!

Dan Hamberg

2y↑20

Seriously if they use this as a prank by danhausen in a story arc that would be hilarious.

Ryan Patstone

2y↑46

I am so here for the energy of William Ass being the stepdadhausen of Danhausen and trying to acclimate his children to their new and delightfully awkward stepbrother.

KaiserSoze679

Would he then transform into Asshausen? And what would his new ring gear look like? 😆

2 More Replies...

Alasdair Duncan

2y↑84

I hope this is the new Gunn Club theme music, if they come out on Dynamite with this song it will be incredible!

Kurt Paulsen

Hell, if they come out on Dynamite at all it will be amazing.... Granted, this song could be a catalyst toward a push...

Broken Brother Ball

2y↑2

@Mike SomethingorAnother thats the idea

Mike SomethingorAnother

2y↑3

the beat sounds so similar to Billy's old "i'm an ass man" theme

TheChapelx

2y↑7

@Johnny Luchador I see Danhausen switching their music without their knowledge

3 More Replies...

Outrider45

2y↑27

This is genius & I hope that Tony Elite makes this the AssBoys new theme officially. Bravo!

コートニーCourtney

2y↑60

Please lord let Danhausen gift this to Billy Ass and the Ass Boys on tv!

Johnny Cage

2y↑7

But mid entrance, just like Bryan did to W. Regal

Exaltedhausen BC

2y↑10

This needs to be on Spotify and iTunes ASAP!!! Exaltedhausen needs this songhausen! It’s very nice very evil!

PunsForAll

2y↑10

Damnit this is amazing. I forgot how great 2 minutes to late night were. I hope this opens the door to more AEW collabs in the future.

Ryan

2y↑29

This needs to be used in AEW!!!

Eric Davis

2y↑1

This theme song is one of the best themes I have ever heard and I have been watching Wrestling for 30 years or so now.
Its built of Billy Ass's old theme making it also a massive tribute I have to ask do you guys have CDs? If so please release this one on CD.
I LOVE to play this through my speakers LOUD!
great job to you for performing it and Danhausen the legend for writing it, I have been listening to it on repeat over and over and over its that good! ❤

I Want To Believe

2y↑5

I really didn't expect this to be such a great song, but now I definitely hope this makes it to AEW TV!

Jeff-El Jefe-B

2y↑62

If the TMTLN show ever comes back, Danhausen needs to be your Andy Richter

PurioO

2y↑64

Love it! Reminds me of Billy's old theme & Ugly Kid Joe's - Everything About You mixed together

Zachary Murphy

2y↑1

@Ryan Corrigan its slightly similar but realized its Billy's "im a ass man" theme tweaked

Ryan Corrigan

2y↑1

As a longtime UKJ fan, I can confirm that lyrically this sounds nothing at all like UKJ, and musically still only remotely.

Zachary Murphy

2y↑3

That's what i was wondering if it was UKJ. Simliar cadence to lyric delivery

Napoleon Blownapart

2y↑5

Bro the pop they're gonna get when they finally become the Ass Boys and come out to this theme is gonna be LEGENDARY

miguel angel salas legonia

It somehow happened at forbidden door buy-in

Kushtoker McGee

2y↑3

I’ve been singing this tune straight since it’s debut last week. Absolute ear candy.Sweet TK, get this on A&W immediately.

Thrillho

2y↑11

Now I know what's gonna be in my head all day...heck maybe even 2 days. There's no telling how long this will last.

Nick Galea

2y↑26

Would say this was amazing regardless, but the absolute joy being shown by Colin makes it that little bit better.

Attack of the Hot MAGA Babes!

2y↑1

The fact that this was played on the actual show (on a freakin PPV no less) gives me endless joy.

Also Danhausen awkwardly just doing his thing was my favorite part of this video

Herman Iles

2y↑17

This is the highest level of creativity and art!

Peter Terry

2y↑10

I really, really REALLY want Billy Gunn's first reaction based on his reaction to hearing Danhausen tell Austin that he will go with him to the Ass ranch!

Peter Terry

By the way, how are the legs doing?

Dr. Cryptox

2y↑7

The fact I love both of these guys, made me super happy to know they're buddies man.

John Gennaria

1y↑1

Ten months later and still a banger

Shan Mao

2y↑26

Ass-olute greatness! Has a lot of "The One" Billy Gunn gimmick too. You can even hear Rockabilly vibes on it.

I'd love to see Billy enjoying this when his sons get embarrassed.

breathingliquid

2y↑11

Sort of sounds like an Ugly Kid Joe song in the best way possible. Good job guys!

Fred Pompei

2y↑3

Very catchy. Didn’t take long for this song to get stuck in my head ❤️🍑

RDK 619

2y↑5

This is the best thing that's going for Billy Gunn and his son's right now. Dan Sure did put these guys over!

colin mclaughlin

Musical legends like Bob Dylan, McCartney, and Prince would be so proud of this song writing. Very Nice, Very Deep. 🎸

Feng Min

2y↑22

Who's here after forbidden door 🤣🤣🤣🤣

jerry janik

They're forbidden door pay-per-view was awesome but I danhausen at double or nothing and I asked him if he ever watched Kids in the Hall any use the Kids in the Hall reference well introducing this video which kind of pissed me off and made me laugh at the same time

Aaron Harber

2y↑2

It's a classic in the making and Danhausen scores again with a Huge assist from Two Minutes to Late Night, bravo to all.

Matt Austin

2y↑66

I was watching Gwarsenio the other day wondering if he knew about the brilliance of Danhausen and now this drops...all is right with the worldhausen!

Kartzzy

@Bruno Rios HuMaN

Dizzolve

2y↑3

All I have to say is, I'm sorry officer, was I making spaghetti too loud?

Bruno Rios

2y↑6

They made what I consider the greatest makeup tutorial ever together.

Joey Clemenza

2y↑12

Gwarsenio was the one who wrote and recorded his ROH theme, lol. well, one of them (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-yYuG86JmQ)

they've also collabed on a couple of videos. it's a match made in heaven!

1 More Replies...

Joey Clemenza

2y↑1

Gotta love that eternal union between metal and wrestling

Gonz216

2y↑16

It's catchy, has a crazy groove and you can dance to it.

David Kirwan

1y↑4

Congrats to the new A&W World Tag Team Champions, Rodd and Todd Ass!

Smoke Dizzle

2y↑4

He just used it on forbidden door! A national treasure

Robber_Crab

2y↑1

As a pro-wrestling fan, this could be the greatest thing I've ever seen.

Kris C

This song is amazing! Danhausen needs to pay the monies to make Rod and Tod walk to the ring with this!

Sam Hoober

I cannot understate just how awesome this is.

Midnight Messiah

2y↑5

LETS GOOOOO!!! IT MADE IT TO A&W'S FORBIDDEN DOOR

Kurt Shepherd

2y↑2

This needs to be used when Danhausen tags with Rod and Todd Asshausen on an A&W show in the near future. Tony Elite needs to make this happen.

EvilDiva1978

2y↑5

I so needed this in my life.

Defrostus

2y↑2

Danhausen and Gwarsenio are two all-time kindred spirits

VectorChef Design Studio

2y↑2

This song is so catchy ! If you guys get to perform live on AEW that would be awesome ! I'd definitely attend a live show (and even a live stream if it was available).

Thomas Knapp

2y↑2

My dream is one day that Rod and Todd will embrace who they truly are, reconcile with their father, and this will be their trios theme as they rise to the top of the division.

GatsuGaming

2y↑1

I watch this every time I need to feel something other than the cold hard reality that my dad isn't as cool as Billy Ass.

evan francis

2y↑5

This must be played and sang on AEW Television

gennaro connors

1y↑1

for reals that guitar solo is so dope and fantastic . the whole song is great, but damn that solo is it. keep killing it.

jake shaffer

2y↑6

I would love to see this swapped in for their music as one of Danhausens very evil pranks, imagine the reaction from the crowd let alone the ass boys

Kenny Wayne

“So many asses, one family tree, we can prove it with a 23 and me!” My god, Danhausen is a lyrical genius 😂😂

Retrogamer 41(A.K.A. SepiaMetanoia)

2y↑12

Man, Danhausen(Love that Danhausen, I tell you) is having a phenomenal week. First he's all elite and now this.

Scott Green

2y↑1

*All Elitehausen

Kirsty Graham

2y↑4

I cannot put into words how much I love this and will never stop listening to it. Perfection.

Joshua Cowsert

1y↑1

Please let this song be heard again in AEW.

Wesley Haines

2y↑4

Danhausen x Gwarsenio is the collab this world deserves

*and Colin

BrickFoxx

2y↑2

This is the best song I have ever heard in my entire life

Ethan Jarom

I want this on Spotify so bad

Ricardo C Joulzenn

2y↑1

The funny thing is that this theme is one that can get them so over with the fans and the fans singing

Eric Velasquez

2y↑1

This is a stroke of genius. Thank you Danhousen.

Matthew W

2y↑1

Danhausen dancing is about the best thing I've seen this year so far

G Van

This song is absolutely, as the kids say, "a banger".

Nick Spencer

2y↑9

Absolute perfection. Seriously this is just PERFECT

Matthew

2y↑3

I've watched this 500 times and will watch another 500 times. I like there's no swearing, very nice, very evil.

rezjedi

2y↑3

This is me and 5yo daughter’s favorite song. Love that Danhausen 🖤

JP Wrestling and Metal Fiend

We need this on Spotify!!!

Larry Anthony

2y↑3

Irelandhausen approves 👍

SkyrushYes MindEraserNo

This song must be on iTunes!!!

Survive the Fire

2y↑14

"And the #1 movie in the country was called "Ass." And that's all it was for 90 minutes. It won eight Oscars that year, including best screenplay."

David VanBogelen

This song gets stuck in my head far too often.

Therestechchunkinmysick

2y↑12

So Danhausen, when you get your trios tag team with Rod and Todd, the perfect name I feel is Very Ass, Very Evil.

NewfieMan98

2y↑2

I can so see Danhausen switching this song with their actual song on the producer's computer

skybluesydney

2y↑3

This needs to be their theme on A&W.

Runjinrun2

2y↑2

Dear god, this is about to be the biggest storyline in AEW isn’t it?

rezjedi

2y↑14

A&W debut!!!!!

TomFoolery

2y↑2

This is the perfect sequel to Billy Gunn's old theme. AEW needs to set up a scenario where they're forced to use this entrance music.

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