“No I don’t need to be liked”
*5 seconds later
“I have to be liked”
*5 seconds later
“But it’s not this compulsive need”
*1 second later
“Like my need to be praised”

The mental gymnastics required to say that string of thoughts 😂

@THEDEAN20061

2y↑1

David here it is
My philosophy is basically this

And this is something that I live by

and I always have
and I always will

Don’t ever for any reason
Do anything to anyone
For any reason ever, no matter what

no matter where or who or who you are with or where are you going or where you’ve been
ever
For any reason whatsoever

All comments from YouTube:

@lilkat6314

4y↑2.3K

"Depression? Isn't that just a fancy word for feeling 'bummed out'?"

" D W I G H T Y O U I G N O R A N T S L U T !"

@cristinacancino4283

4y↑5

Lil' Kat lolz

@elphiegleason3899

4y↑17

I want this as a ringtone

@MysticFNW

3y↑4

LMFAO I LOVE THAT ONE

@gabrieldragos7081

3y↑7

Where aaare the tuuuurtleees?
Where are theeeeyyy?

@rengab137

One of my favs

5 More Replies...

@gudduentertains

4y↑1K

Michael Scott, the undisputed King of memes!

@davidbehrens4760

4y↑20

SpongeBob SquarePants has left the chat

@godussop391

4y↑15

ANURAG KANDARI definitely spongebob

@dasherino7785

I dispute this

@todd4292

@David Behrens p]ppp pp] ppl p

@todd4292

ppp

10 More Replies...

@RasenRendanX

4y↑882

Man imagine a Michael Scott during this 2020 Pandemic. Oh my Lord

@wickedshadesproductions5254

4y↑16

RasenRendan he probably would be sick by now

@portland4660

4y↑47

EVERYBODY STAY CAAAALM!!!

@joec7217

4y↑29

I know one thing for sure. He wouldn't follow the "stay at home" policy

@keesaa3588

4y↑19

I swear they did an episode similar to a pandemic, I remember dwight letting everybody in the office cough on him

@joec7217

4y↑3

@ken santos They did

22 More Replies...

@mongoose1618

2y↑53

"I'm going to throw a bridal shower for guys. A guy shower. An hour long shower with guys".
Mad respect for Pam for keeping a straight face through this.

@Nicks_Random_Vids

XD I love that one!!!

@Nicks_Random_Vids

1y↑1

“An hour long shower with guys” gets me every time 🤣🤣🤣

@xavierlacasse58

4y↑375

“You miss a hundred percent of the shots you don’t take.
-wayne gretzky”
— MICHAEL SCOTT

@MarcoAntonio-wn3qi

2y↑14

Every, and I mean EVERY line for Michael Scott (and also for others in this show) is so carefully written. Never out of character, it`s impressive. Michael is always so contradictory and delusional, and he stays that way until the end. Brilliant.

@jadenhardman7118

4y↑370

"If i had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Ladin, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice."

This is my favorite quote, it gets me every time😂😂😂

@theone5411

4y↑1

Ikr lol 😂😂😂😂

@saras.2173

4y↑2

This one was my favorite too!

@powcar91

4y↑14

I quoted that line, and a coworker. Tought I was crazy, he didnt watch the office. What made it even worse, he was an army vet. He said you need some help.

@madisongracedeluise

3y↑1

Lmao 😂

@Nicks_Random_Vids

SAAAAMEEE

@briannahacsunda4970

3y↑82

“i underestimated you”
“yea well maybe next time you will estimate me”
best quote ever

@livr2783

4y↑155

I was fully prepared for a list of Michael just saying “that’s what she said”

@jacksimpson9499

1y↑13

Only missed one. “I don’t care if Ryan murdered his whole family… he’s like a son to me”

@angiemarin622

4y↑114

The fact that there are 30 quotes in here and that is not even enough to describe how Michael is… that says a lot about this man

@paolavignaroli6711

4y↑3

that's what she said

@TheFriedFootball

2y↑80

" Toby works in HR he is a part of corporate, so he is not really part of our family. Plus he is divorced, so he is not part of his family too"
Michael Scott is a savage

@angelareese390

2y↑5

that quote was from one of the first few episodes & I remember watching it on TV, right around this time 16 years ago (w/ newborn baby) & I thought it was so funny I remember calling my friends pleading with them to watch the show. now my 16y/o daughter can pretty much quote the entire series 😆

@Nicks_Random_Vids

Ohhhh I remember that!!! Frfrfr

@jesusisgodofall9479

4y↑677

“I’m not superstitious but I am a little stitious” Michael Scott

@breemonetcrochet

4y↑9

I say this all the time and people just look at me like ●_● lmao

@ItsHorizonz

4y↑11

Most underrated Michael Scott quote, change my mind

@PortaPunch

4y↑4

I used this one today!

@jacoblugo6589

4y↑210

My favorite quote will always be “you have no idea the physical toll, that 3 vasectomies have on a person”

@dimmysimmy1236

4y↑34

Snip snap snip snap snip snap

@razkable

3y↑3

my fave is in the coup about what goes on inside the mind of a lion..we may never know..we don't have the technology...hu?

@caballerothenotsogreat9110

4y↑488

"Webster's dictionary defines weddings as the fusing of two metals with a hot torch. ".. 😂😂😂😂😂

@JoeMakaFloe

4y↑5

My question is how he reached the LD instead of DD, L is far from D

@AverageMfDoomEnjoyer

4y↑4

I was reading this while it was happening

@Cobrakai180

4y↑2

But Homer said it's the process of removing weeds from one's garden. Who am I to believe?

@mambamentality2417

4y↑4

This is low key one of the funniest lines.

@rafaelmontoya1454

@zane is da best same

4 More Replies...

@scottystcloud7086

32w↑1

The turtles scene is not only one of the funniest in this shows illustrious bounty of moments, but one of the funniest of any show ever. You need the context of it for the full effect (i.e. Michael is trying to beat Ryan's automated sales portal with good ol fashioned gift basket tactics and is failing horribly so this meltdown is less about the turtles than his imminent defeat but also the turtles were what he was most excited about in the gift baskets). Gold.

@matthewgamelli1251

2y↑5

I love how Kevin gave him the number to Wendy’s when Michael was trying to get the employees to set him up on a date 😂 “Dude, this is a Wendy’s restaurant.” 🤣

@paolocargnin7926

4y↑643

False. Best quote? This one:
I want to get married and have 100 kids so I can have 100 friends and no one can say 'no' to being my friend.

@releasethebeast2893

4y↑51

I felt so bad when he said that, and i'm so glad that Michael had a happy ending

@bastianbruun3302

3y↑33

@Pluto's Moon that’s what she said

@blairassani7595

2y↑1

That one hurt

@zerot480

4y↑209

"Is there a god? If not, what are all these churches for?"
Michael, you're a very intelligent man

@fernandoolmedo2558

4y↑24

and who is Jesus's dad?

@brentw0681

@Fernando Olmedo God

@wickedshadesproductions5254

4y↑65

30 was not enough
We need more!!!
We need more ‘That’s what she said”

@mushky3940

2y↑7

Michael screaming " I declare bankruptcy " is one of his best moments. Love it.

@PatrickWagz

2y↑2

He didn't scream it, he declared it.

@Nicks_Random_Vids

1y↑1

@Patrick Wagz yeah MUSHKY XDXDXD

@PatrickWagz

@@Nicks_Random_Vids "Still..." -- Oscar Martinez

@chrismccaffrey8256

2y↑9

Dwights face in the missing turtles scene 🤣

@theduke5355

4y↑1.3K

False: all of michael scotts quotes should be on here

@livingelegant

4y↑20

except when he said he was moving to Colorado

@bayleeraines2040

4y↑1

Henry Von Dorn 😢😢😢😢

@ivorydeluxe1672

4y↑10

I read that in Dwights voice

@prithvishbanerjee6922

4y↑2

@Henry Von Dorn terrible decision.. show was never the same without him..

@emrenarin6470

4y↑1

fact: bears eat beets

5 More Replies...

@innocentorotherwise

4y↑123

"It's like all my kids grew up and married each other. Exactly what every parent wants."

@josh_the_alien

4y↑5

Sweet home Alabama

@davileal957

4y↑189

"Today I was responsible to save one life... My own. Am I a hero? I really can't say, but yes."

@Imnotyourmamaluke

4y↑2

I Braveheart. Lol

@PatrickWagz

@Ima Goyl Bippity Boppity.

@Football__Junkie

4y↑21

The one about shooting Toby twice always has me rolling. 🤣😂🤣

@batgurrl

4y↑5

Love The Office and love this list💕

@angiemarin622

4y↑1.2K

OH MY GOD, IT'S HAPPENING, EVERYBODY STAY CALM

STAY F**** CALM

@gracebutcher1364

4y↑23

Angie Snape i feel like this is micheal scott during quarantine

@jonathanz4386

4y↑2

Exactly this one I thought had to be on there

@analigiabatres9114

Me when Jim and pam kisses

@devon8372

EVERYBODY JUST FUCKING CALM DOWN

@danielrussell6615

I fking loved that haha

@Gmrby-kj3up

4y↑34

1:43 is one of the most underrated The Office quotes ever

@Imnotyourmamaluke

4y↑1

Toasting Easy Rider's wedding. Phlob 😂

@josephrehan6978

4y↑726

As a doctor, you wouldn’t tell someone that they have cancer.

@jonanddy

3y↑1

what do you tell them instead

@deleted_215

3y↑10

@Jon Andy “You have irregular cell multiplication which could result in the potential start of your death should you choose to procrastinate in the seeking of medical treatment”

@jonanddy

3y↑8

@Red_Spy_4152 I’m a little slow and those are a lot of big boy words that’ll just go over my head inevitably resulting in my premature demise

@Cheyenergy

3y↑9

Michael is great lmao not only the shit he says,
but his delivery 🤣🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭😭

@roccodamato25

3y↑20

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."
-Wayne Gretzky
-Michael Scott

@TheUnhandy

4y↑22

Dwights face after Michael says “the turtles” 3:38

@timovangalen1589

45w↑1

“I have made some empty promises in my life but hands down that was the most generous.”

@Nicks_Random_Vids

1y↑1

Ur videos always leave me satisfied and smiling 😂

@baileydickson8473

That's what she said

@Nicks_Random_Vids

@Bailey Dickson “thats what” -She

@user-ir6mk6me7t

3y↑7

First time i watched the office, i didn't find most of the scenes funny and i didn't know why but after re-watching all these clips on YouTube, i understood that most of it have flown over my head. I will be watching it for the 2nd time.

@surajhegde1304

4y↑45

O man how I wish this show never ended

@sandrahatherley2184

3y↑3

With Michael always in it

@Farmdude07

4y↑813

“Well, well, well, how the turn tables”

@polarpenguiingamesstudios2188

@hklegomaster

3y↑8

That’s what she said

@Cheyenergy

3y↑1

My favorite one 😭😭😭

@zolekamagagula5574

😭😂😂😂😂

@nadeygmail944

, 🤣🤣🤣

2 More Replies...

@chimichanga269

4y↑2

I love how Jim was encouraging him in the last one

@ImMacke3000

49w

2:54 Johns grin trying not to laugh is amazing, since the dementor line was unscripted

@jamesstates2654

1y↑2

"Hey Daryl hows it hanging" will always be my favorite

@deleteme924

27w

That was a bit too harmful to be very funny

@Leprosita80

4y↑2

Impossible not to love him ❤

@theaveragejoe7966

3y↑6

''If there is no God then what are all the churches for?''

Confirmed Michael is a genius

@joeydamisfit

4y↑11

I need more of this show

@GLB223

4y↑269

Shouldn’t this be a longer list?

@overkill0284

4y↑3

Alessandro Amore yes it should

@guille7497

4y↑2

go and do it yourself

@dominicesposito4394

4y↑5

Guille Martinez that’s what she said

@Colinkrauss1

40w↑1

@rakshitrao7873

4y↑63

oscar : you can't say bankruptcy and expect something to happen
Michael : i didn't said it i DECLARED it . lmao

@PatrickWagz

Oscar: still

@rileykunath1165

4y↑667

What about “I like waking up to the smell of bacon, sue me”

@Imnotyourmamaluke

4y↑12

Or I'm an early bird and I'm a night owl, so I'm wise and I have worms! I love that one.

@zebdawson3687

2y↑6

“Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate, so he really not a part of OUR family. Also he’s divorced, so he’s really not a part of HIS family.” 🤣

@Nicks_Random_Vids

@siddharthnikhil744

4y↑646

Dude what about "Don't ever, for any reason, do anything, to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been, ever, for any reason whatsoever..."?

@prithvishbanerjee6922

4y↑28

I was searching for this.. sometimes when you start a sentence, you don't know how it will end, so you just keep going.. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@lizaharris4517

3y↑4

that's my favorite michael scott quote 😂😂😂

@HNAMUSICC

3y↑1

That was my senior quote😂

@THEDEAN20061

2y↑1

@Oddpistachio1

2y↑2

Michael: "An hour long shower with guys."
Pam (In her head): You do you, Michael. 😄

@reinadesuenos

4y↑3

I will randomly laugh at #10 periodically throughout my life.

@iconicfury

2y↑8

Everyone inside the car was fine, Stanley.

@SerG-ez2po

3y↑4

Before "where are the turtles", when Michael and Dwight all wet after driving the car into the lake went back to collect the basket with goodies and the manager was like" what happened to you guys?" While they were standing all wet 🤣

@NaeroK87

2y↑6

“A guy’s shower, an hour long shower with guys” 🤣

@greg_gamer

4y↑6

"'You miss all the shots you don't take.' - Wayne Gretzky" - Michael Scott

@Dale-ct5ru

4y↑14

Oh my god, I JUST now got the joke about the wedding one! I've seen that quote a million times, but I only just realized - it's supposed to be 'welding'! This changes everything! Was I the only one who didn't get it?

@ItsHorizonz

4y↑2

Yeah no I missed it too, but he has better quotes 😂

@yasminfarzan6371

4y↑1

Omg same

@Nicks_Random_Vids

I thought he said wedding!!!!

@diorme9941

3y↑5

“You Wouldn’t Arrest A Guy Delivering Drugs From One Guy To Another”😂

@Nicks_Random_Vids

Remember the grass on a bag Michael bought for like 500 bucks 🤣

@arecaceae

2y↑1

first 4 seasons were golden. it was pretty much of a down hill from there in my opinion. also, everytime i think about it, it looks more mental that they actually went on with the show after steve carell ~~therefore michael scott~~ left the show. mental

@TheHistoryMakers101

4y↑5

Love this, Very Funny <3

@isazap7551

I just want to say they should have every episode script here because I can’t-

@MPHswayze

2y↑3

Not on here: When Michael Scott learns about the dangers of breast cancer, he points at Pam's chest and says "you better get those things checked out, they're ticking time-bags"

@brndn2208

2y↑1

I like how he was talking about welding instead of the wedding hahaa

@gscrawford74

4y↑17

i declare bankruptcy makes me fall on the floor laughing every time

@ccpr15

Me too! 😹😹😹

@eggnog7079

4y↑22

"He had no arms or legs, he couldn't hear, see or speak...

this is how he led a nation."

@kristenrock1733

4y↑7

" It's Britney Bitch " is my favorite Michael quote . lol

@Nicks_Random_Vids

AWWHH SAMEEEEE I love this oneeee

@phinatic9591

3y↑1

"And these two are metals......gold metals" self applause

@rydawg26

4y↑185

“That’s what.
- She”
- MICHAEL SCOTT

@LeonardoHernandez-eg5dv

4y↑12

"That's what
- She
- Michael Scott"
- Rydawg 26

@Crispitreats

4y↑9

“That’s what
- She
- Michael Scott
- Rydawg26
- Leonardo Hernandez”
- Table-Country pinxing THRYM Firearms 27

@PRXDVENOM

4y↑9

“That’s what
- She
- Michael Scott
- Rydawg 26
- Leonardo Hernández
- Table-Country pinxing THRYM Firearms 27”
- Matthew crispi

@seanwar5240

4y↑3

this deserves more recognition

@PRXDVENOM

4y↑4

Sean War delete this you broke the streak idiot

1 More Replies...

@sauravkumar3278

4y↑1

Best farewell episode I've ever watched

@muthonieelsie6532

3y↑1

You wouldn't arrest a guy who's just delivering drugs from one person to another 😂😂😂😂

@devinoneill7314

4y↑5

This is where I'm gonna come to find my senior yearbook quote

@spawnofhades

4y↑25

Michael: I love Burlington Coat factory
Immediately the next scene: NOOOOOOOOOOO

@jakob3805

4y↑2

This man is the meme creator

@bigchungi3567

4y↑5

We all hated Michael at first and then he left.... then we all wanted him back ☹️

@sandrahatherley2184

3y↑1

Never hated Michael

@jackieramirez6209

who’s we?

@Nicks_Random_Vids

@Jackie Ramirez royal we

@fathergabrielstokes4706

4y↑77

"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."

@timmycrackz

3y↑1

That was always one of my favorites!--top 5 definitely. It perfectly illustrates the essence of Michael's linguistic difficulties....

@_niy2xx

3y↑3

WHEN HE PULLED UP PLAYING "JUST DANCE" I DIEDDDDD 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂💀💀💀💀💀

@Nicks_Random_Vids

It’s Brittany - - - - -

@natsume5828

4y↑2

i am not satisfied WE NEED MORE MICHAEL

@Nicks_Random_Vids

“That’s what she said”
-Michael scott

@Johnsechuan

3y↑2

I died at that white wine part

@Kamingo170

2y↑3

This show is the best when you're stoned

@bdflatlander

18w

Yes, like me right now

@kale3668

4y↑6

"I just might be a basketball machine"

-Michael G. Scott

@alphakakcmeddlakadoofahkii3362

4y↑4

Ryan is book smart and I am street smart. And also street smart.

Best Michael moment ever

@deleteme924

27w

You typo a typo

@sebastiantrygg4310

”Hey! Hey! I don't go make burgers where you work and then tell you how to make burgers!”
-Michael Scott

@kristianvolkmann091

4y↑25

I thought all 30 quotes would just be:

“That’s what she said!”

@uraniumeater925

1y↑1

I think the main difference between me and Donald trump is that I get no pleasure out of saying the words “you’re fired”. “Uh, your fired”. He just makes people sad, and an office can’t function that way

@lipHs1

4y↑36

"Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice... strike three."

@Nicks_Random_Vids

I have that on a mug 😂

@daniloferreirac7939

2y↑1

"the worst thing about prison was the... was the dementors"

but fr, "I declare bankruptcy" should be the opening for any the office funny clips we se here on yt

@chillychese1359

3y↑1

"Who is Jesus's dad?" This question is just as important as who is the Scranton strangler.

@wingingglobe4095

1y↑4

Michael severely needs a therapist

@yourfriendlysleepparalysis7169

4y↑2

Michael: Wikipedia is the best thing ever
Teachers: That’s illegal

@danielskrivan6921

4y↑23

"Webster's Dictionary defines a wedding as the fusing of two metals with a hot torch."

@ethan6764

4y↑5

"I want people to be afraid of how much they love me"

@moonisusman4072

4y↑1

" Yeah, well... maybe next time you will estimate me."
Michael Scott ladies and gentlemen.

@emphaticjam4381

4y↑29

As soon a Michael said “he just makes people sad” Paul Lieberstein’s name appeared on the screen

@SIRDKA

4y↑2

Brilliant, just brilliant.... Thanks

@sunandinighosh6037

3y↑2

I expected it to be longer

That's what she said

@AbixkolaXD

2y↑1

“Bros before hos. Why? Because your bros are always there for you. They have got your back, after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you were nothing but great to your ho. And you told her she was the only ho for you. And that she was better than all the other hos in the world. And then... suddenly she's not your ho no mo”

@deleteme924

27w

Ain't that the truth

@firecrackerjack68

3y↑2

"May God guide you in your quest."

@stoopnation2944

2y↑1

“You getting it regularly man? I can tell her it’s part of the job”

@jimmiesox6402

4y↑20

Who would have thought that Michael Scott had predicted the outcome of the trump presidency years ago. “He just makes people sad.”

@rachelwood9438

He has one of trumps books in his office 😂

@rahul91090

4y↑1

Webster definition of wedding 🤣🤣🤣

Load More Comments...

More Comments

just now