Lights
39. Ellie Goulding Lyrics

I had a way then
I used to have a certain path in life

Losing it all on my own
But I lost my way and everything alone

I had a heart then
I used to have a strong and full heart

But the queen has been overthrown
But something or someone has taken over and ruined it all for me

And I'm not sleeping now
I can't sleep these days, I'm too restless or anxious

The dark is too hard to beat
I'm struggling to fight or cope with my inner demons

And I'm not keeping up
I'm not able to keep up with the demands of life or of myself

The strength I need to push me
I need some external force or support to lift me up and move me forward

You show the lights that stop me turn to stone
You bring light into my life and prevent me from freezing or feeling numb

You shine it when I'm alone
You help me see through the darkness when I'm by myself

And so I tell myself that I'll be strong
I try to convince myself that I can handle everything and be tough

And dreaming when they're gone
I find solace and refuge in my dreams and imagination when the lights are out

'Cause they're calling, calling, calling me home
I hear some sort of voice or longing that beckons me back to my true home or identity

Calling, calling, calling home
This voice keeps persistently calling me back to where I belong

Noises, I play within my head
I have a lot of inner chatter, doubts, fears, or fantasies that I create in my own mind

Touch my own skin
I try to ground myself and feel alive by touching my own body

And hope that I'm still breathing
I pray or wish that I'm still alive and present

And I think back to when
I reminisce about a time or a place that made me feel secure

My brother and my sister slept
I remember a moment when my loved ones were close and safe

In an unlocked place
We didn't need any locks or barriers to feel protected

The only time I feel safe
That was the only time when I could truly let my guard down and be at ease

Home, home
I miss home, where I belong and feel cared for

You show the lights that stop me turn to stone
Again, you have the power to keep me alive and motivated

You shine it when I'm alone
You radiate hope and comfort even when I'm isolated or lonely

And so I tell myself that I'll be strong
I try to bolster myself with courage and resilience

And dreaming when they're gone
I use my dreams and fantasies as a coping mechanism when I'm faced with challenges or fears

'Cause they're calling, calling, calling me home
That inner voice or longing is still calling me back to where I truly belong

Calling, calling, calling home
I can't ignore that persistent call to come back to my roots and essence

Home, home
That's where my heart and soul feel complete and fulfilled