Reminiscing
CXRPSE Lyrics
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Yeah, yeah yeah, yeah
I remember i was young i ain't feel any pain
Used to play with my friends
And i hated the rain then i was an adult
That's the day shit changed
Watched it fade to grey
I used to wish that i was older
Maybe things would be better
Now it's clouds over my head
Always rainin' for weather
I could sit and talk about
All the cheese and the cheddar
But money never meant shit
In fact it's my biggest stresser
Wish i nevеr grew up
Wish i woulda stayed a kid
Wish i didn't have rеgrets
Of all the shit that i did
All the people i hurt
The opportunities i missed
All the time that passed
While i sat and reminisced
I wish i could go back
Wish i never took a drink
Used to down a whole bottle
Just so i wouldn't think
Used to chase around dreams
That got washed down the sink
Drinking suicidal thoughts
I never wanted a shrink
I hope my parents’ll be proud
Of what they made
Hoping that they won't look at
My life as a mistake
Every single day i'm tryna
Make a fucking change
Lay me down to sleep I pray
To god my soul to take (take)
The lyrics to CXRPSE's song "REMINISCING" delve deep into themes of longing for the past, regret, and the weight of responsibility that comes with growing up. The opening verses paint a picture of innocence and carefree youth, where the singer reminisces about simpler times when playing with friends was all that mattered. The mention of hating the rain symbolizes a time when discomfort was fleeting and inconsequential. However, as the singer transitions into adulthood, a stark shift occurs, and the vibrant colors of their world fade to grey, mirroring the loss of innocence and the harsh realities that come with maturity.
As the song progresses, the lyrics reveal a sense of disillusionment and yearning for a simpler, happier past. The singer reflects on the pressures and burdens that come with adulthood, expressing a desire to turn back time and avoid the mistakes and regrets that have accumulated over the years. The weight of these regrets is palpable in lines that touch on missed opportunities, hurtful actions towards others, and the passage of time that slipped away while lost in regretful thoughts. This sense of wistfulness and nostalgia is further underscored by a longing to undo past actions, particularly in relation to destructive coping mechanisms like drinking and chasing unattainable dreams.
The lyrics also touch on the complex relationship with mental health, as the singer grapples with suicidal thoughts and the urge to escape the pain of their past actions. The mention of drowning sorrows in alcohol and avoiding facing difficult emotions highlights a coping mechanism that ultimately exacerbates inner turmoil rather than providing solace. The desire for self-improvement and redemption is evident in the singer's plea to make a meaningful change, to break free from the cycle of regret and self-destruction that has clouded their life.
In the closing lines, there is a poignant plea for acceptance and forgiveness, both from oneself and from others. The singer expresses a hope that their parents will see beyond their mistakes and recognize the efforts made to overcome past missteps. This desire for validation and understanding is encapsulated in a vulnerable prayer for peace and salvation, underscoring the internal conflict and emotional turmoil that underpins the nostalgic reflections on the passage of time and the weight of regret in the journey from youth to adulthood.
Line by Line Meaning
I remember i was young i ain't feel any pain
As a child, I was carefree and didn't experience any pain or struggles.
Used to play with my friends
I spent my time happily playing with my friends.
And i hated the rain then i was an adult
Growing up changed my perspective, and what used to bother me as a child became insignificant when I became an adult.
That's the day shit changed
That marked a turning point where everything started to shift in my life.
All the color in the world, watched it fade to grey
The vibrancy and excitement of life slowly diminished as I grew older.
I used to wish that i was older, maybe things would be better
I longed for the future thinking it would bring improvements and happiness.
Now it's clouds over my head always rainin' for weather
I now constantly face difficulties and challenges that weigh me down.
I could sit and talk about all the cheese and the cheddar
I could boast about material wealth and success, but they don't bring true fulfillment.
But money never meant shit, in fact it's my biggest stresser
Despite the emphasis on money, it only brings me anxiety and pressure.
Wish i never grew up, wish i woulda stayed a kid
I wish I could go back to the simplicity and joy of childhood, avoiding the complications of adulthood.
Wish i didn't have regrets of all the shit that i did
I wish I could live without the burden of regret for past mistakes and actions.
All the people i hurt, the opportunities i missed
I carry the weight of causing pain to others and missing out on chances in my life.
All the time that passed while i sat and reminisced
I spent so much time dwelling on the past instead of moving forward.
I wish i could go back, wish i never took a drink
I wish I could turn back time and avoid the self-destructive path I took with alcohol.
Used to chase around dreams that got washed down the sink
I pursued dreams and aspirations that ended up vanishing or being unattainable.
Drinking suicidal thoughts I never wanted a shrink
Instead of seeking help, I drowned my dark thoughts with alcohol, avoiding therapy.
I hope my parents’ll be proud of what they made
I desire for my parents to be proud of the person they raised me to be.
Hoping that they won't look at my life as a mistake
I wish for my parents to see value in my life choices and not view my existence as a misstep.
Every single day i'm tryna make a fucking change
Each day, I strive to institute positive changes in my life and mindset.
Lay me down to sleep I pray to God my soul to take (take)
Before sleeping, I express a prayer to God, entrusting my soul to divine care.
Lyrics © O/B/O APRA AMCOS
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